Those not of the Mormon faith (officially known as The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) may very well feel stymied by the fact that Mormons will not share in detail what goes on inside the temple. Regarding the confidential nature of temple ordinances, Boyd K. Packer wrote the following:

“A careful reading of the scriptures reveals that the Lord did not tell all things to all people. There were some qualifications set that were prerequisite to receiving sacred information. Temple ceremonies fall within this category.

“We do not discuss the temple ordinances outside the temples. It was never intended that knowledge of these temple ceremonies would be limited to a select few who would be obliged to ensure that others never learn of them. It is quite the opposite, in fact. With great effort we urge every soul to qualify and prepare of the temple experience” (The Holy Temple, booklet adaptation [1982], 2).

By way of comparison, I’d like to share a personal experience.

As a college student I had a summer job working at a nationally run research lab. My second summer at the lab I was granted a heightened security clearance, given a new badge, and trained on complicated procedures for closing specialized locking drawers and safes. I was excited about the new distinction and advertised to all my co-workers that I was now available to “work classified,” meaning I could now work on projects requiring this higher security clearance. As it turns out, most of my days working classified that summer were spent proofreading page after dreary page of safety documentation. After a few days at my new post, a co-worker who’d worked classified many years must have read my face because he jokingly commented, “You never knew the government’s secrets were so boring.”

It is easy to fantasize and perhaps sensationalize what goes on behind secured doors. In the case of my summer job, the classified work taking place was certainly important, but it lacked the prestige, romance, or drama that I looked for as a twenty-year-old. Entering the temple for the first time was, in many ways, a similar experience. It felt wonderful to be there, but for the most part the temple wasn’t anything shockingly new or different from what I’d learned in church all my life. It was like one step up in security clearance. I had reached a point in my life when I could accept more responsibility and was eager to do so, but the religious work that took place in the temple, important though it is, felt like a familiar extension to that which I’d already done in my life to that point. And while I’ve come to appreciate the temple more and more with time, at times it still proves to be less than earth shattering when I fail to have “ears to hear” (see Matthew 13:9).

Boyd K. Packer continues:

“The ordinances and ceremonies of the temple are simple. They are beautiful. They are sacred. They are kept confidential lest they be given to those who are unprepared. Curiosity is not a preparation. Deep interest itself is not a preparation. Preparation for the ordinances includes preliminary steps: faith, repentance, baptism, confirmation, worthiness, a maturity and dignity worthy of one who comes invited as a guest into the house of the Lord.”

The temple is a place for members to further commit themselves to carrying out the work of God. It is worth every sacrifice to prepare oneself to enter. While it is true that those who take part in the temple agree not to divulge what takes place inside, those who have yet to attend may be assured, it isn’t to prevent hoards of twenty-something’s from lining up to be in on the excitement.

Our violin teacher listened as my son played a piece at his lesson. He made an error on one passage and as he repeated the piece, he played the same mistake over again. She commented, “We all think practice makes perfect, but really, practice makes permanent.” To undo the mistake he had practiced 20 times, he had to re-learn the section and play it correctly about 50 times until the change started to become natural.

Children are so easy to teach and absorb lessons so willingly. What we do every day in our homes is what is becoming permanent for our children. How we speak to our family members, our reaction to stress, time spent in entertainment or at work, and time spent together or apart is all becoming permanent. The small, seemingly insignificant things that we unconsciously practice each day are becoming permanent for us and for our children.

And how much easier it is to learn it right the first time instead of spending time correcting and re-learning! The well-known quote reads:

“Sow an act and you reap a habit. Sow a habit and you reap a character. Sow a character and you reap a destiny.” Charles Reade

The scriptures teach the same principle:

“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6

Julie Beck, leader of the women's organization in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, had a father that knew practice makes permanent.

“I was raised in a big family. My parents had a lot of children. And that means there were a lot of opinions and a lot of work to care for this family. But they used the tool of family home evening to really teach us. Every week we sang “Love at Home.” That was the opening hymn. And I remember as a teenager thinking it was really tiresome to sing that hymn every week.

It was more a belief than a practice. But every week, Dad would say, “Now we’ll sing our opening hymn, ‘Love at Home.’ ” And when I was about 14 or 15, in that age when you question everything, I asked my father, “Why do we have to sing this hymn every week? There are a lot of good hymns in the hymnbook we could sing.” And he looked at me very sternly, and he said, “When you have learned lesson 1, I will teach you lesson 2.”

And I don’t know what lesson 2 was; we didn’t ever get there, but I have to say that after the passage of many years, I look at my family, and we do love one another. We did, somehow, over the years, learn to love each other because that was lesson 1 my parents wanted to teach. They didn’t try to cover everything. They knew if they started with that, it would work.” Worldwide Leadership Conference, February 2008

If we are making things permanent, whether intentional or not, then what can and what should we make permanent?

Make Love a Permanent Part of Our Families

Julie’s parents wanted love to be permanent in their family. It was their Lesson One. Our children learn to love others mostly by watching how we love them. They watch how we speak and whether we listen. They watch the service and effort we put into caring for them (even though we may think it is completely missed!) They watch how we treat our spouse.

On some days, having love be a permanent part of our families may seem impossible, but it can be done! We can exchange family names for homemade gifts on holidays, attend a performance to show support, listen when someone has a bad day, plan weekly time together, pray together and read the scriptures together. Even simple tasks of service, like bringing someone a glass of water before bed, can make love permanent.

Make Self-Respect Permanent

Insisting on teeth brushing, bathing and basic levels of cleanliness is daily practice that becomes permanent. We can set the standard for modest dress. We can expect good language in our home for our children and their friends. We can require simple chores, all making self-respect more permanent.

Make Integrity Permanent

We can set the standard for honesty in our family, even if the truth means getting in trouble. We can set the example for integrity with fidelity in our marriages and honesty in our work. We can require that our children follow through on promises made, no matter how small. We can discourage gossip in our teenagers. We can have our children return borrowed toys and replace broken items for their rightful owners.

Of course, there are many more good things that parents want made permanent. It is no wonder that the home is the best place for the practice. The good daily choices our children make that seem dull or unimportant are the same simple practices that build permanent and enduring character.

It is best said in the scripture:

“Behold I say unto you, that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass.” Alma 37:6

Practice makes permanent, and permanent is powerful.