Mary Fielding Smith did not let the trials she had already faced, or those she would face in the future as a widowed mother in a church under constant threat of persecution and death slow her down or destroy her faith. She accepted that other people would be able to cause troubles for her she couldn’t control, and she might be among a hated group, but she could could still take control of much of her life. Like so many pioneer women, she showed extraordinary courage and faith through even the most challenging times.

Mary was left not only to take care of her own children, but also to care for several ill or disabled people her husband had been caring for prior to his death. The Mormons were forced out of their city in Illinois. Mary took her family to Winter Quarters and then the move to the Salt Lake Valley was underway. Some of her household had already gone ahead in 1847, but in the spring of 1848, Mary was determined to set out and join them. She had two young sons, but no other real support.

While preparing for the journey, she and her brother, Joseph Fielding, took a fifty mile journey into St. Joseph, Missouri to get supplies for the winter and for the upcoming journey to the Salt Lake Valley in Utah. They took two wagons and two yokes of oxen for each wagon. Her nine-year-old son, Joseph F. Smith, who would later become the president of the Mormons, went with them. It was a very difficult journey, filled with bad roads and worse weather. On the trip home, they stopped to camp beside a spring, where they could oversee the entire prairie. They noted a herd of beef cattle camped nearby, so they decided not to turn their own cattle loose, for fear they’d be rounded up with the beef cattle when that group departed. They kept the animals yokes on, but let them go out to feed. However, in the morning, several of their best oxen were missing. The two Josephs headed out immediately to search for them in the wet prairie. Hours later they returned, nearly exhausted, to find Mary kneeling in prayer. Her young son approached her quietly and heard her pleading with God to return the oxen to them so they could make it safely home. As she stood up, he noted a peaceful smile come on to her face, filling him with hope.

His uncle was not as hopeful. He informed Mary the oxen were gone, probably rounded up with the beef cattle despite their attempts to make them stand out. Mary smiled and simply told them to go get the breakfast she had made them and she’d just take a little walk and see if she could find them. Her brother was astonished. After all, they’d spent hours searching already. How could she find them on a little walk? However, Mary set out. The person in charge of the beef cattle saw her and road over to tell her he’d seen the cattle. He pointed her in the right direction, but to his surprise, she continued on her original path, the opposite direction from which he sent her.

Young John, worried about his mother’s safety, had been monitoring her progress as he ate. Soon he saw her motion for him to join her. He and his uncle hurried to her, John running and arriving first. She pointed out the oxen, who had gotten trapped in a clump of willows at the bottom of a washed out gulch, completely hidden from sight. Mary’s son always remembered this story as one of his first experiences with the power of prayer.

She didn’t have enough teams to pull the wagons she should have taken with her and she hadn’t enough money to buy them, but she persisted in her plan. Without enough oxen, she fastened together two wagons and then hooked them up to cows and even calves. They really weren’t strong enough to pull the load, it would seem, but this is how they set up. There were trials of all sorts, including getting stuck in the mud and coping with broken equipment. Her cows needed breaking and struggled with the hills. All of this came before she even reached Elk Horn, where the Saints, as the Mormons called themselves, were gathering to organize into companies for the trip. She reported herself as ready to go.

Captain Smith, learning she had seven wagons, but only four yokes of oxen, some cows and some calves, told her it was foolish to even attempt the trip under these conditions. He said she would wind up being a burden on the men, who would have to help her and take care of her. However, she firmly told the captain, “I will beat you to the Valley, and ask no help from you either!”

Her first step was to arrange to buy, on credit, more oxen from families who were not going to be able to make the trip that year. She was now much better prepared, but the captain, not having a sense of humor, had not appreciated Mary’s defiance of his advice or her boast that she would beat him to the valley. He seemed determined to make sure her boast didn’t come true by making the journey as unpleasant for her as possible. She responded by praying and ignoring him, refusing to let him get her down.

One extremely hot day, one of her oxen suddenly fell to the ground in spasms. The men who came to see what was wrong decided the ox had been poisoned. The captain promptly pronounced him dead and said in either resignation or triumph that they were going to have to figure out some way to take Mary and her family along. He reminded her he had said all along she’d end up being a burden.

Mary wasn’t giving up so easily though. Mormons teach that members of the priesthood, which is held by all worthy men, can perform healing through the power of Jesus Christ. They do this by having two or more men stand in a circle around the person in need, placing a drop of oil that has been prayed over on the person’s head, and then praying for his recovery or for God’s will to be done, depending on what the person saying the prayer feels inspired by God to say. Mary remembered this and thought that in such desperate circumstances, when she needed the ox to keep God’s commandment to gather to the Valley, that God would also heal her ox. She quickly found the consecrated (prayed over) oil and asked some of the men to give the ox the priesthood blessing or prayer normally given to sick humans. They agreed. The moment the prayer began, the ox stood up and continued on his way, as healthy as ever.

As they crossed over the Big Mountain, they saw the Salt Lake Valley for the first time. They were anxious to arrive quickly so the company traveled until quite late. The oxen were turned loose to graze. However, when they arose in the morning, some of Mary’s oxen were missing. Mary’s son John set out to search for them, since they were essential for the trip. However, the captain, even knowing Mary’s oxen were missing, ordered the company to leave earlier than usual. Perhaps he saw a chance to make sure she wouldn’t be able to keep her promise to beat him to the valley. He and the others left to continue the journey and Mary was left alone with her family to hunt. Eventually, John found the oxen and they set out with little hope of catching up.

However, the captain was not having an easy time of things. A terrible storm arose where he and the others were and frightened the teams, who refused to continue the trip. They were forced to unhitch the cattle and take shelter. The now freed cattle took off in every direction, so when the storm ended, the company was forced to go on their own cattle search. As they were searching, Mary and her family drove up—and kept right on going, not waiting for them. She arrived in the valley a full twenty hours before the obnoxious captain and the rest of the company.

It is helpful to understand a little about the role of the Mormon prophet and how Mormons view him. With this knowledge, it is easier to understand why Mormons are willing to follow a prophet.

Students of the Bible are familiar with the concept of prophets. In Old Testament times, God called men to be prophets to deliver God’s word to the people. While each person is able to pray to God privately and learn His word, it would be very complicated to pray about each possible doctrine individually. God also has messages for us we might not think to pray for. A prophet serves as a channel for all the information a person needs to live according to God’s plan. In a world in which many prominent people are willing to guess at God’s word, and to teach their personal beliefs as scripture, a prophet is a sure source of information. Christians want to be certain they are living as Jesus taught, and not as someone else has decided they should live.

Adam was the first prophet on earth, speaking directly to God to learn truth and to find out what God wanted Him to do. Other prophets soon followed. Of course, there have been times when God withdrew prophecy because the people refused to listen or to honor the prophets, but He has always restored them. Prophets were on the earth to prepare the people for the first coming of Christ, and as we approach the second coming, we naturally need prophets again. For this reason, God restored prophets to the earth in modern times. The second coming requires as much preparation as did the first coming.

But how do the Mormons know their prophet really is the prophet God has chosen for this time? Mormons are taught from early childhood, and, if they are considering becoming Mormon, to ask God who the prophet is. They are instructed not to take the word of anyone on earth—not the Church’s word, not that of their parents, not that of their teachers. All of those sources are a place to be taught the gospel, but no one can give another person a testimony. A testimony can come only from God through confirmation from the Holy Ghost.

“If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him,” taught James, believed by many scholars to be the half-brother of Jesus. (See James 1:5) Each person is entitled to turn to God for wisdom and to find out for Himself, from the only source that is completely trustworthy, that the head of the Mormon church is indeed God’s prophet. Prior to baptism, prospective members are interviewed and asked if they have taken this step.

Once a member has gained a testimony of the prophet, they can trust His teachings. However, should they at any time feel uneasy about something, they can again return to God to pray about it. This is why Mormons who have taken the time to pray about their choices are unshakable. They gained their testimonies directly from God.

Some outsiders will warn their members not to pray about which church to join, or about the prophets, because they claim the petitioner won’t know who is answering. Mormons, however, trust God. Because God promised in the Bible that we could ask Him anything and receive an answer, we trust Him to keep that promise. We know God can do anything, including answering us in a way we can recognize as coming from Him. The better we know God, and the more time we spend talking to Him and “listening” to Him, the more familiar His “voice” will become to us. Of course, prayer answers seldom come through a voice, so this is a symbolic way of speaking. It means we can recognize the ways he communicates with us, and understand how to know what the answer is. Mormons ask God because they believe Him when He makes promises.

Learn how to recognize answers to prayers.

Having an understanding of the process followed by Mormons to learn whether or not God speaks to us through prophets as well as individually, you are ready to understand why Mormons are willing to take direction from this prophet. You may already understand it, if you are a person who always strives to do what God wants you to do.

Mormons are taught the gospel of Jesus Christ as it is revealed in the scriptures. These scriptures include both the Old and New Testaments, as well as scriptures revealed through prophets in modern times, including the Book of Mormon and also as it is revealed to the prophets.

These scriptures teach us both the penalties for ignoring God and the blessings that come from obedience. We’ve seen throughout history that fear of punishment is not enough to make people obey God. Noah relentlessly taught the gospel to the people, and warned them of the upcoming flood. Despite this, they chose to ignore his warnings and continue in their sins. Why did they do this? Some probably didn’t believe Noah. Others thought it couldn’t happen to them. Most disobeyed simply because they did not love God more than they loved their sins.

Although Mormons are taught the consequences of disobedience, they don’t focus on them. Instead, they are taught to obey out of love for God. “If ye love me, keep my commandments,” Jesus taught. (See John 14:15) Love should always be the reason for obedience. Obedience that grows out of love for God is sincere and powerful. It is easier to keep the commandments for One we love, and the greater our love, the greater our obedience. Obedience that comes from fear or from a mere sense of obligation seldom lasts and does not produce all the blessings of obedience done from the heart. Obeying from love enlarges our spirit, increases our testimony, and helps us to become a better person. It allows us to become more like Jesus Christ.

A previous Mormon prophet, Ezra Taft Benson, taught, “When obedience ceases to be an irritant and becomes our quest, in that moment God will endow us with power.” (See Elder Donald L. Staheli Of the Seventy CES Fireside for Young Adults on 2 March 2003.)

At a New Year’s Eve party, the host asked the guests to write on a sheet of paper what they hoped to accomplish in the year to come. Each guest did so and sealed and labeled the envelope. The host took the envelopes to his bank and placed them in a bank vault until the following year.

Elder Packer quotes Heber C. Kimball, who said, “I have said often, “you may write blessings for yourselves, and insert every good thing you can think of, and it will all come to pass on your heads if you do right.”

Elder Packer and his wife had listed six things they hoped for, all for others and all seemingly impossible. However, because they had written those things down, they periodically prayed for them to come to pass. Each time they prayed, they received personal inspiration that allowed them to further their goals. He noted that they would likely have ignored or not received those inspirations if they had not set down a goal. Five were accomplished, and on New Year’s Eve the next year, they learned the final goal had been achieved by the friend they had been praying for. Although he knew nothing of the goal Elder Packer and his wife had set, he happily informed them the serious challenge faced had been resolved (Packer, Boyd K.. “A Host of Goals.” Memorable Stories With a Message. Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co, 2001. 7-8. Print).

Unless we set goals, we risk roaming through life without ever really accomplishing anything meaningful. It can be easy to get caught up in the pace of life and the immediacy of issues and never really plan our lives. Making a goal, writing it down, and setting a deadline can help us accomplish everything God sent us to do, resolve problems, and even bless others. When we add prayer to the plan, we insure that God’s will can be carried out for us.

The first step to planning the coming year is to pray for inspiration. We usually have a good idea of what we want, but sometimes God has another plan and His is always better. We want to be sure our plans are aligned with His.

Next, we should decide what we want to have happen in our lives. I spend time picturing my life one year from now and then write down what has to happen to bring that picture to life. I try to be sure my vision is realistic—I can’t be a best-selling novelist by next year if I’ve not even written a book, or have no idea how to write one. I also work to keep the number of changes I have to make under control. No one is going to keep 100 resolutions, but we are likely to keep five manageable resolutions.

The next step is to write them down. If they aren’t written, they probably won’t happen. Decide where the resolutions will be kept for the coming year.

For many people, this is the end of the process. However, if this is all the planning that occurs, the resolutions will be broken or forgotten in a few weeks. Each resolution needs its own plan.

A goal must be broken down into manageable steps. “Write a book” is a huge goal with many smaller steps involved. Plan each step and create a timetable for accomplishing it. If your goal were to write a book, you might first need to learn how to write a book. Write that down as the first step and then research how to learn. What books will you read? What friend will you meet with for advice? How long do you need to do this?

The next step would be to choose the topic of the book. Will it be fiction or non-fiction? What will it be about? You may not know the entire outline of the book, but you do need to know what type of book you’re writing so you can study the correct preparation materials.

After this, the prospective writer would need to decide how long the book will be and then figure out how many pages he has to write each day to accomplish it in one year. Since writers are usually reminded that they need only write a page a day to finish the first draft in a year, the goal-setter might decide to write two pages a day, to allow for Sabbath breaks, holidays, sick days, and the preparatory learning.

Continue in this fashion until you know what steps are needed to complete your goal and you’ve created a timeline for achievement. You’re now well on your way, but you still aren’t finished.

When are you going to work on this goal? If you’re planning to read the complete works of Shakespeare this year, will you read in the mornings, before bedtime, or during your lunch hour? If you don’t choose a time and clear your calendar, it won’t happen. You’ll get busy and you’ll climb into bed at the end of the day still not having found a free hour to read.

What will you do if you break your resolution or fall behind schedule? It is at this point most people give up. You can help to prevent this by planning in advance how to handle it. If you decided to read the Old Testament this year, will you take on extra reading to catch up, or simply continue reading the planned number of pages each day and redo the schedule, so you finish after the end of the year—but you do finish? Will you re-evaluate your plan to see if it was realistic and rework it to meet the reality?

There are times when it is appropriate to abandon a goal. If you’ve decided to return to college, but a child becomes seriously ill, the child will naturally come first. This is not a failed goal. You have prioritized the conflicting challenges of life and made the proper choice. Sometimes, while praying, we learn we need to put a goal on hold or abandon it all together. When my children were younger, I began a freelance writing career. When things changed and I began homeschooling, I was warned during a prayer that I could not handle both my writing career and homeschooling. Many people do, but I wasn’t one of them. I put the goal, pursued with Heavenly permission, on hold for eight years until prayer revealed it was time to restart. The start I had made many years before made the new developments in my restarted career possible, so it wasn’t a failed goal at all—simply an altered timeline after consultation with God.

When goals are approached prayerfully, and prayer is a regular part of the year’s plans, it is very likely we will achieve our goals, or be aware of what God wants us to do in relationship to them. God wants us to achieve our righteous dreams, and when we live worthy of His help, and we choose goals He approves of for us, we can do and become everything He wants us to become.

Brigham Young had an answer for this question. He’s said to have told people his greatest fear was that people in the church would start to take what he said as the will of God and not take the time to go to God personally to receive confirmation of it.

Although Mormons are taught to honor their prophets and to follow them, it’s not a blind following. Only God can be completely trusted to always tell you the truth, and only God knows the truth of all things. Mormons are taught even before they join the church to pray and ask God if the current prophet really is God’s prophet. Then, afterwards, at any time, th

Thomas S. Monson, current

ey can return to God and ask about specific teachings the prophet has given.

In the case of the hypothetical situations Mormons are always being asked about, a member who reads an article by a church leader will generally follow the following pattern:

Before reading or listening, they pray for the spirit. This will often tell them what is true while they’re receiving the information. Once they received the counsel, they place it in context of other teachings they’ve received. For instance, if the prophet said to store food away so you’ll have enough to eat if you lose your job, a member would say, “Oh, I’ve heard that many times before and already know it’s true.” He wouldn’t likely take time to pray about this, since it’s repeated often.

If it’s new counsel, he might compare it to see if it fits in with previous teachings. For instance, prophets often tell us to store wheat. If this were the first time we’d been told to store wheat, we might think to ourselves, “Well, that’s the first time wheat’s been mentioned, but we’ve often been told to store food in general, so I’ll just add that to it.” It fits into previously given counsel.

However, if a member heard entirely new counsel, and just couldn’t quite feel comfortable with it-maybe because it would require him to stop doing something he loved-he could then take it to God in prayer. Following the established pattern for prayer, he would study the problem in his mind, come to a decision, probably based on what he already knows about God and the gospel, and then come to a conclusion. He’d then kneel in prayer and ask God if he’s made the right choice.

Spencer W. Kimball, a past prophet, spoke on the subject of blind faith. “When men obey commands of a creator, it is not blind obedience….God’s every command is righteous, every directive purposeful, and all for the good of the governed. …

Is it blind obedience when one regards the sign “High Voltage-Keep Away” or is it the obedience of faith in the judgment of experts who know the hazard?

Is it blind obedience when the air traveler fastens his seat belt as that sign flashes or is it confidence in the experience and wisdom of those who know more of hazards and dangers?

Is it blind obedience when the little child gleefully jumps from the table into the strong arms of its smiling father, or is this implicit trust in a loving parent who feels sure of his catch and who loves the child better than life itself? …

Is it then blind obedience when we, with our limited vision, elementary knowledge, selfish desires, ulterior motives, and carnal urges, accept and follow the guidance and obey the commands of our loving Father who … created a world for us, loves us, and has planned a constructive program for us, wholly without ulterior motive, whose greatest joy and glory is to “bring to pass the immortality and eternal life” of all his children? [See Moses 1:39.]

It is not blind obedience, even without total understanding, to follow a Father who has proved himself. (”Chapter 13: Obedience Born of Faith in God,” Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Spencer W. Kimball, (2006),135-44

In the case of the hot stove, it’s likely a child touched a hot stove against the advice of a parent at some time in his childhood. Having done so, he learned first that stoves can be hot, and secondly, that parents can be trusted. Over time, as his parents continued to be right about physical danger, it’s likely he stopped feeling the need to touch every stove or try out every dangerous thing. Whereas, as a toddler, he might have heard a parent say the stove was hot, but he had to find out for himself. As an eight-year-old, if his parents told him it was too dangerous to go outside in the current weather conditions, he might obey without first testing, having learned his parents were usually right.

In the same way, Mormons learn to trust their prophets, and they learn to trust God. A new member is likely to pray about every individual doctrine, but a later member, having learned that when he does so, God always says yes, the prophet is right, no longer needs to do this. He can spend his limited life doing more important things. He saves his confirmation prayers for those situations which leave him uncertain, or which require greater sacrifice to carry out.

Being able to turn to God is one way God protects his children from unscrupulous leadership. They need never take anyone’s word for any part of the gospel, but can always go directly to the source. The prophet delivers God’s message and guides the church, but each member is individually responsible for confirming the truthfulness of what they’re being told.

Someone just learning about the church through Mormon missionaries will be taught how to pray almost immediately. Then, after each lesson, he will be asked to pray about it privately to know for himself it’s true, rather than taking the word of the missionaries. This is a critical step in the member’s progression, because someone who does this is far less likely to fall away from the church in the future. His testimony will be based on a firm foundation-God.

This is followed by an adult verse. The adult shares his testimony of God with the child, reassuring him God is listening, because the child is God’s own child, and is loved. The adult encourages the child to pray and promises he will be heard.

This is a lovely song which addresses an important issue for both adults and children. Sometimes it can be hard to keep our faith strong when times are hard.

When we left God’s presence, He created a way for us to stay in touch with Him through prayer. Prayer allows us to talk to God, but it isn’t a one-way communication. He also arranged for us to be able to “hear” his answers to us. The answers aren’t really a voice, most of the time. Usually, it’s more of a feeling, an impression in our minds, or a strong feeling of good or bad in our hearts. This comes to us through the Spirit of Christ or through the Holy Ghost.

Each person has the Spirit of Christ available to Him. We can also receive visits from the Holy Ghost, which is the only source of truth. Once we’re baptized, we can receive the Gift of the Holy Ghost from a priesthood holder with the proper authority. This gift can be with us around the clock if we live worthily.

However, it takes practice to learn to recognize the promptings of the Holy Ghost. I first felt it when I was ten years old and was listening to a missionary at a Mormon temple visitor’s center talk about the Book of Mormon. I was not Mormon and didn’t attend church regularly, so I had no idea what I was experiencing. Over the next several years, I felt the same feeling, and gradually began to notice it always occurred in religious settings, and most often in situations where Mormons were involved. When I began to visit the local Mormon church, a friend explained to me this was the Holy Ghost.

Even then, it took time to recognize it as an answer to specific prayers. I learned to first study out the issue in my mind, and then to ask God if I had made the right choice. When I’d done my share of the process, God always did His. I learned to recognize the warm, peaceful feelings as being signs of confirmation or approval from God, and the confused, uneasy feelings as God’s way of warning me I was on the wrong track, and needed to think it through more carefully.

Every talent requires practice. No one expects to pick up a paint brush for the first time and paint a masterpiece. The same is true of prayer. If we want to recognize God’s “voice” in our lives, we need to train and to practice. When we live the way God teaches us to live, study the scriptures, and spend time praying, we are training. When we resist the temptation to pray and then leap up and run off without waiting for an answer, we’re improving our ability to receive the answer. When we trust the answers we receive and act on them, we demonstrate our faith in God. The stronger our faith, the better able we are to recognize His presence and understand how He guides us from day to day. As the song says,”Pray. He is there. Speak-He is listening.”

Listen to A Child’s Prayer.

So why pray at all, if God’s going to do what’s best, anyway?

Letting God choose isn’t the same as not praying-you don’t get the same results. When you don’t pray at all, you don’t invite God into the process. You do all the research, make all the plans, make all the decisions, and then carry them out alone. You also accept the full responsibility for the results, which may affect others, and may include unintended consequences. Eventually, we have to answer to God for the choices we make. Wouldn’t it be better to run them by Him to begin with?

When faced with a problem that doesn’t involve a decision, such as a serious illness, we can also choose to let nature take its course if we want to, or we can ask God to step in and do what’s best. We have agency, we can choose whether or not to seek and receive help.

Praying allows us to do several things. First, when you have to make a choice, you often consult with an expert. For instance, if you’re having trouble getting your toddler to nap, you go to your favorite message board, the experienced mom next door, or your most dependable parenting book. This might be enough when an experiment or two won’t really hurt anything, but often, the choices we need to make are much larger than that. They can change our entire lives, or the lives of others. In those cases, there is only one possible source of advice.

Sometimes a decision may not seem critical, but in the long run, the choice you make can have unexpected consequences or rewards. For instance, when my husband wanted to move here, closer to his job, I balked. I liked it where I was and didn’t want to go. Finally, I took it to God and was told very clearly to go. Now that I’m here, I know why. I’ve had opportunities here I’ve needed and couldn’t have gotten if I’d stayed put. There was no possible way to foresee those opportunities, however, on my own. I could have stayed, and maybe nothing awful would have happened, but later on, when a need arose, I wouldn’t be ready for it because I’d lack some skills I needed.

Sometimes our requests involve the agency of others, and God can only plant ideas in their hearts, but can’t take away their agency. It is still worth praying over, because we do want those ideas planted if they’re what’s best and we’ll know we did the best we could, even if praying was all we could do when the problem concerned the choices of others.

Another purpose in prayer is to give us regular feedback on our choices. We need to learn how to make wise choices for our lives. Sometimes the results of our choices are obvious, but often, they aren’t. When we make decisions about parenting, for instance, the results may not be known for decades. Parenting fads change often and by the time we find out what would have been best, it’s too late. When we regularly go to God for help with our daily choices, we can watch for patterns in His answers, and after a while, our ability to make decisions He approves of improves.

When we put things into God’s hands, we avoid the randomness of the natural world. We have a feeling of peace and security because we know the best choices are being made, even if we can’t possibly understand why God made the choice He did.

We have agency, the right to choose. God won’t force us to turn our problems over to Him. We can choose to do everything ourselves, hoping for the best and trusting our own wisdom, which is limited and usually self-centered, or we can opt to turn our problems and needs over to God and let Him show us the path. The results of either choose-going it alone or turning it over to God-will be very different in most cases, but the choice is yours.

In today’s age of modern technology, this might not seem as complicated as it once was. Most of us feel we know many people we’ve never met. However, in general, we get to know God the same way we get to know everyone we have a close, personal relationship with. We spend quality time together, we talk, we listen, and we try to find out as much as we can about the person. We invest a great deal of time in building our relationships with people in our earthly life we care about, and we must devote at least as much time building our relationships with God and Jesus Christ.

A good first step is to gather some factual knowledge. We have access to scriptures that teach us about God, and we can read them slowly and thoughtfully, not rushing through to meet a schedule, but pondering what they say. We can even start a journal of our thoughts as we read, or begin a notebook in which we record everything we learn about God as we read.

On the official church website, LDS.org there are many articles about both God and Jesus Christ. We can read the thoughts of church leaders and ordinary church members on God and Jesus, and learn their experiences with Them. These allow us to find ways to apply those insights to our own lives, and perhaps to better understand our relationship with God.

Of course, information isn’t enough. It creates a knowledgeable person, but it doesn’t create a personal relationship. To have a personal relationship, you must have communication. This communication comes through prayer, the way God created for us to stay in touch with Him while we’re away. Prayer is not a one-way form of communication. We can talk to God, and through the power of the Holy Ghost, He can also communicate with us, a part of the process often neglected when prayer is discussed.

Here’s a brief overview of how to pray: Begin by respectfully and lovingly addressing God. (Dear Heavenly Father, My beloved Father in Heaven, etc.) Then thank Him for everything you have received from Him. Spend some time in advance thinking this through, so you begin to develop an appreciation of the many blessings you have. Even the hardest life comes with blessings, but we have to pay attention to find them sometimes. Next, if you need something, ask for it. This can include a request to help build your relationship with God. Make sure what you’re asking for is righteous and really needed, and that it’s something you can’t give yourself, unless you’re asking Him to help you with the process of obtaining it. You can also spend time just talking to God about any subject that’s on your mind. It’s peaceful to talk to someone who really understands, and He, unlike your earthly friends, never complains you’re talking too long. Then close in the name of the Savior, Jesus Christ, and finish with the word Amen.

Now the harder part begins. Most people get to this point, and jump up, rushing off to the rest of their day. However, before you close the prayer, sit quietly for a while and just listen. How can God answer you if you don’t wait for His answer? The answer can come to you in several ways. One way, the least common, is through a voice. This is more common in extreme emergencies where the Holy Ghost knows you need to hear Him right away. Another way is for thoughts to enter your mind. The third way, and the more common way, is for you to experience peacefulness in your mind when you’ve made the right decision, and a negative feeling when you’ve made the wrong decision.

This, of course, means you can’t just run to God with a question. You need to think the problem through and try to come up with your own solution. Then you take it to God for confirmation. God is a good parent and good parents never do for their children what their children can do for themselves.

The final step to building a relationship to God is, of course, to do His will. If we’re studying and praying, but then doing anything we want, our relationship with Him is empty and meaningless. “If ye love me, keep my commandments,” Jesus told his disciples. Mormon beliefs help guide its members to a close and personal relationship with God.

How many times have we felt as the Old Testament prophet Nehemiah and were found on our knees “beseeching” the Lord in prayer? The word “beseech” means to beg eagerly for or to make an urgent appeal. No one makes it through this life without some degree of sorrow and some seem to have more than others. Sometimes we feel strong as we bear our burdens but other times we feel weak and desperately seek relief. The only true source of relief comes through our loving Heavenly Father.

However, sometimes our pleadings to the Lord seem to go unanswered. Why are some prayers answered to the immense relief and joy of the supplicant while others are left to wade through their trials? Why are some prayers answered immediately and others take time? Why is it that as I struggle to do what is right I see others prospering and living a life of relative ease while ignoring the councils of God? Wouldn’t life be better without trials and tribulations? Why me?

Feeling like I needed more understanding on this matter I looked to the Lord. After my own beseeching I turned to the scriptures. In the Book of Mormon, Another Testament of Jesus Christ, I found a man named Amulek who was teaching a group of people about prayer.  He taught them,

“humble yourselves, and continue in prayer unto him…ye must pour out your souls in your closets, and your secret places, and in your wilderness.

“Yea, and when you do not cry unto the Lord, let your hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him continually for your welfare, and also for the welfare of those who are around you.

“And now behold, my beloved brethren, I say unto you, do not suppose that this is all; for after ye have done all these things, if ye turn away the needy, and the naked, and visit not the sick and afflicted, and impart of your substance, if ye have, to those who stand in need—I say unto you, if ye do not any of these things, behold, your prayer is vain, and availeth you nothing, and ye are as hypocrites who do deny the faith.” (Alma 34:19,26-28)

I realized that I was not doing as much as I could. I assumed prayer would be enough but there is much more the Lord wants us to do as we seek answers. Early members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, known as the Mormons, were suffering great persecutions and were told that “they were slow to hearken unto the voice of the Lord their God; therefore, the Lord their God is slow to hearken unto their prayers, to answer them in the day of their trouble”. (Doctrine and Covenants 101:7)  I realized that if I wanted something from the Lord I needed to be diligent in my efforts to follow His commandments.

I continued my search for understanding. Spencer W. Kimball (1895–1985), the twelfth President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, wrote a book called Faith Precedes the Miracle. In it I found enlightenment.  He said,

“Should all prayers be immediately answered according to our selfish desires and our limited understanding, then there would be little or no suffering, sorrow, disappointment, or even death, and if these were not, there would also be no joy, success, resurrection, nor eternal life and godhood. …

“Being human, we would expel from our lives physical pain and mental anguish and assure ourselves of continual ease and comfort, but if we were to close the doors upon sorrow and distress, we might be excluding our greatest friends and benefactors. Suffering can make saints of people as they learn patience, long-suffering, and self-mastery. …

“If all the sick for whom we pray were healed, if all the righteous were protected and the wicked destroyed, the whole program of the Father would be annulled and the basic principle of the gospel, free agency, would be ended. No man would have to live by faith. …

“If joy and peace and rewards were instantaneously given the doer of good, there could be no evil—all would do good but not because of the rightness of doing good. There would be no test of strength, no development of character, no growth of powers, no free agency, only satanic controls.” (Faith Precedes the Miracle (1972), 97-100)

It was to me as “cold waters to a thirsty soul”. (Proverbs 25:25)  How could we feel joy if we never felt sorrow? We would never know the difference. We were sent to this earth as a test; to gain experience and make wise choices. It is referred to as the Plan of Salvation or Heavenly Father’s Plan of Happiness.

What if everyone was granted every desire just by asking? What if no one ever got sick or died, how would God’s plan work? What if every good deed was immediately rewarded and every wrong choice instantly punished? Everyone would be good I have no doubt but what would be our motivation? It would be a conditioned response without understanding.

I thought back through my life and realized at the times of greatest distress where the times of greatest growth. I could see that the Lord lifted and strengthened me as needed. Sometimes He answered my prayers immediately, sometimes after some time had passed, sometimes in ways I wasn’t expecting. As I stayed close to Him He always answered my prayer and I came out of the experience a better person.

It is still painful to go through sorrow and distress.  Sometimes it is self-inflicted, sometimes others inflict it, and sometimes things just happen. I know now to stay close to the Lord and obey his commandments. I also need to include deep supplication and conversation with Him followed by doing what I can to help others who are suffering. I need to “succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees”. (Doctrine and Covenants 81:5) Then I need to leave it up to God knowing He knows what is best for me and will answer my prayer appropriately.  As I have continued through life with this knowledge I realized I can be happy and at peace even in the midst of trouble. I know Heavenly Father loves me and is watching out for me. I can see His hand in my life guiding me and supporting me and helping me to return to Him.

Imagine for a moment that a child who is kneeling with his family in prayer hears his mother telling Heavenly Father about a trial the family is facing. He then listens as she asks God to give them courage to face the trial and the wisdom to make the proper choices. Finally, he hears her express her faith in God’s presence and love as they go through the trial, and her sure knowledge that God will help them.

What lessons has the child learned from this prayer? He learns that his mother has faith in God. She trusts God to help them. He also learns that she plans to make her decisions for handling the trial by listening to God’s advice. He discovers she is not afraid because she isn’t handling the trial alone. All of these lessons go directly into a child’s heart. Without a parental sermon, the child has received an eternally significant lesson in the power of prayer and in God’s love and guidance. He will be able to draw on these critical lessons when he faces his own trials. Later, the mother can explain that in her private prayers, and in the prayers she and the child’s father have together, they will ask God for guidance and remain on their knees, waiting for an answer. This opens up opportunity for the child to ask how they will know what the answer is, and for the parents to share their testimony that God always answers prayers.

Imagine children listening as their father says the family prayer. They hear their father express his love for his children and for his wife. As he tells God the good things his wife brings to the family, the children learn to respect their mother and her role. When the son grows up, he will search for such a wife, and he will treat his own wife with the love and respect he learns as he listens to his father pray. The daughter will learn what a good wife and mother is and will also seek out a man who respects her as much as her father respects her mother. While they must also see this love and respect in action each day, the prayer puts into words what they may have seen, but not paid attention to or understood.

When parents pray, children can hear and feel their parents’ testimonies of the Savior and learn what parts of the gospel and of their lives their parents cherish and honor. These lessons stay in their heart because they come at a time when the children are feeling the spirit and prepared for eternal truths. These lessons are more effective than mere lectures from parents, which may seem contrived and “good for you.” Prayer is the heart’s conversation with God, and so it is a powerful way to teach the gospel to children.

Ammon and his brothers were the sons of a Nephite King. The Nephites were God’s people who lived in the Americas starting 600 years before Christ was born. The king, Mosiah, knew his time on earth was coming to an end, and asked his sons who should be king. All of these young men declined the offer, wishing instead to go and serve as missionaries to the Lamanites. The Lamanites were those who were either led to hate the Nephites because of the traditions of their fathers, or who had openly rebelled against God’s Church.

Mosiah feared for his sons’ lives, and took his concerns to the Lord in prayer. There he was reassured they would be kept safe as they performed His work.

Ammon separated from his other brothers and came to the land called Ishmael that was ruled by a man called Lamoni. Ammon was bound and brought before the king, who asked why he had come to this land where he was hated. Ammon surprised Lamoni by saying his only wish was to serve. Lamoni, pleased by this, set him up with other servants to guard the flocks.

A local band of Lamanites took immense pleasure in scattering the flocks of the king. The servants were far outnumbered and had no way of keeping this from happening. On the third day of Ammon’s service the flocks were once again scattered. The other servants began to murmur. They knew King Lamoni would have their lives, as it had happened to other servants before them.

Ammon immediately saw where he could use this experience to help open a door to missionary work. He calmed the servants down saying together they would re-gather the flocks. The servants obeyed, and soon enough they’d accomplished this task. Once again the band of Lamanites came to scatter the flocks. Ammon charged the servants to surround the flocks, and stepped up to deal with these awful men.

Try to imagine the sight of one, lone, unknown individual going up against a throng of evildoers. They had no idea the Lord had promised Ammon’s father no harm would come to this son, nor did they realize what power had been granted to Ammon because of his righteous desires.

Ammon began to fling stones with his sling. The Lamanites were astounded as man after man fell, six in all. They rushed at him with their own slings and clubs, but none could touch him. Any one who raised a hand against him had his arm cut off. The only man to die by the sword, however, was the leader of the pack. As he went down the others began to flee from this frightening sight.

Once the Lamanites left, Ammon placed his sword and sling away, continued to water the flocks, and returned to the king’s household. His fellow servants, no doubt shocked and amazed by all they had seen, followed his lead. But upon returning to the household they gathered up many of the arms that had been cut off to use as a witness of the remarkable events.

Needless to say King Lamoni was astonished. He asked where Ammon was, to which the servants told him he was preparing the horses for the king’s journey into his father’s land, which had been commanded of them even before they left to water the flocks.

Lamoni’s words beautifully show his surprise. “Surely there has not been any servant among all my servants that has been so faithful as this man; for even he doth remember all my commandments to execute them” (Alma 18:10). Lamoni sent for Ammon, and then the missionary work began.

What can we learn from Ammon about being a successful missionary? Whether you’re a member of a church, specifically called to be a missionary, or simply feel the importance of sharing the Lord’s gospel, here are a few keys to follow:

First is to study, pray and fast (Alma 17:2-3). You can’t teach what you don’t know. You need to pray about the things you read to know if they are truth, and you should fast to keep yourselves in better tune with the Spirit of the Lord.

Second, you need to love God and others. I think loving God comes first. It was because of their love for God that the sons of Mosiah wanted to go out and preach His word, to turn the hearts of those who didn’t know better towards the light. As you explore and enlarge that love for God, you might be surprised to find your capacity to love those who may hate you growing by leaps and bounds.

Third, we need to give service and develop trust. Why is giving service so important? It is a remarkable teaching tool. Think of the Savior, who led a life of service. Only the most humble willingly set aside their own pride and serve others. Those who voluntarily give of their time, efforts, talents, and means instill in others the desire to trust. Ammon’s first act as a captive of Lamoni was to offer his service. He saved the king’s flocks. He could have gone strutting back in to the king, all full of himself, and demanded that Lamoni now listen to him. He could have caused much fear in the hearts of those who didn’t understand. Instead, he quietly went on with the work he’d been commanded to do.

Fourth, we need to teach from the scriptures. Once King Lamoni trusted Ammon, he allowed this great man to teach the word of God. Doors were opened. Lessons were taught. An entire city was converted to the Lord’s Church. It was truly a miracle.

One last thing. We can be the greatest orator in the world, teaching and preaching whatever may come into our hearts, but it won’t mean a thing unless we have the Holy Spirit with us. If we are not worthy to have his presence with us, if we are teaching things that go against the Lord’s ways, the Holy Spirit cannot reside. It is the Holy Spirit that testifies to our hearts, and then the teaching truly begins.

To be the most effective teachers, or missionaries, we have to have that Spirit with us.
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To read the full story of Ammon, start with Alma 17.