That begs the question: Why pray at all if God’s going to do what’s best, anyway?

Letting God choose isn’t the same as not praying — you don’t get the same results. When you don’t pray at all, you don’t invite God into the process. You do all the research, make all the plans, make all the decisions, and then carry them out alone. You also accept the full responsibility for the results, which may affect others, and may include unintended consequences. Eventually, we have to answer to God for the choices we make. Wouldn’t it be better to run them by Him to begin with?

When faced with a problem that doesn’t involve a decision, such as a serious illness, we can also choose to let nature take its course if we want to, or we can ask God to step in and do what’s best. We have agency, we can choose whether or not to seek and receive help.

Praying allows us to do several things. First, when you have to make a choice, you often consult with an expert. For instance, if you’re having trouble getting your toddler to nap, you go to your favorite message board, the experienced mom next door, or your most dependable parenting book. This might be enough when an experiment or two won’t really hurt anything, but often, the choices we need to make are much larger than that. They can change our entire lives, or the lives of others. In those cases, there is only one possible source of advice.

Sometimes a decision may not seem critical, but in the long run, the choice you make can have unexpected consequences or rewards. For instance, when my husband wanted to move here, closer to his job, I balked. I liked it where I was and didn’t want to go. Finally, I took it to God and was told very clearly to go. Now that I’m here, I know why. I’ve had opportunities here that I’ve needed and couldn’t have gotten if I’d stayed put. There was no possible way to foresee those opportunities, however, on my own. I could have stayed, and maybe nothing awful would have happened, but later on, when a need arose, I wouldn’t be ready for it because I’d lack some skills I needed.

Sometimes our requests involve the agency of others, and God can only plant ideas in their hearts, but can’t take away their agency. It is still worth praying over, because we do want those ideas planted if they’re what’s best and we’ll know we did the best we could, even if praying was all we could do when the problem concerned the choices of others.

Another purpose in prayer is to give us regular feedback on our choices. We need to learn how to make wise choices for our lives. Sometimes the results of our choices are obvious, but often they aren’t. When we make decisions about parenting, for instance, the results may not be known for decades. Parenting fads change often and by the time we find out what would have been best, it’s too late. When we regularly go to God for help with our daily choices, we can watch for patterns in His answers, and after a while, our ability to make decisions He approves of improves.

When we put things into God’s hands, we avoid the randomness of the natural world. We have a feeling of peace and security because we know the best choices are being made, even if we can’t possibly understand why God made the choice He did.

We have agency, the right to choose. God won’t force us to turn our problems over to Him. We can choose to do everything ourselves, hoping for the best and trusting our own wisdom, which is limited and usually self-centered, or we can opt to turn our problems and needs over to God and let Him show us the path. The results of either choice —going it alone or turning it over to God — will be very different in most cases, but the choice is yours.

This article was originally published in February 2009. Minor updates and changes have been made.

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.

This is not always easy, especially for parents. Lehi, the first prophet we read of in the Book of Mormon, had, at the beginning of the book, four sons. The two oldest were not truly converted to the gospel. When they had to leave Jerusalem because God had instructed Lehi to do so, they complained. They tormented their faithful younger brothers, even to the point of attempted murder. Can you imagine the sorrow Lehi and his wife, Sariah, faced as they watched their sons consistently make poor spiritual choices?

These parents never gave up on their children. They taught, counseled, set a good example, and prayed. In the end, however, Laman and Lemuel, the two oldest sons, had to decide for themselves what to believe and how to live. Lehi and Sariah didn’t give up on their children, and God didn’t give up on the parents.

In 1 Nephi 7, we learn that Laman and Lemuel, along with other members of the party, are complaining about the journey in the wilderness to the new homeland chosen for them by God. Nephi chastises them and tries to remind them of God’s teachings. In verses 16-18, we see that the older brothers don’t take correction well, especially from a younger sibling:

16 And it came to pass that when I, Nephi, had spoken these words unto my brethren, they were angry with me. And it came to pass that they did lay their hands upon me, for behold, they were exceedingly wroth, and they did bind me with cords, for they sought to take away my life, that they might leave me in the wilderness to be devoured by wild beasts.

 

17 But it came to pass that I prayed unto the Lord, saying: O Lord, according to my faith which is in thee, wilt thou deliver me from the hands of my brethren; yea, even give me strength that I may burst these bands with which I am bound.

 

18 And it came to pass that when I had said these words, behold, the bands were loosed from off my hands and feet, and I stood before my brethren, and I spake unto them again.

Soon after this traumatic family crisis, Lehi was given a vision from God. While the content might not have been exactly what he’d hoped for, it taught him an important gospel principle concerning his rebellious sons and helped him to understand he was not responsible for their decisions, having done all he could do for them. In this well-known vision, Lehi sees a man in a white robe who summons Lehi to follow him. He is taken to a field:

10 And it came to pass that I beheld a tree, whose fruit was desirable to make one happy.

 

11 And it came to pass that I did go forth and partake of the fruit thereof; and I beheld that it was most sweet, above all that I ever before tasted. Yea, and I beheld that the fruit thereof was white, to exceed all the whiteness that I had ever seen.

 

12 And as I partook of the fruit thereof it filled my soul with exceedingly great joy; wherefore, I began to be desirous that my family should partake of it also; for I knew that it was desirable above all other fruit.

When Lehi looks for his family, he finds his wife, Sariah, and his two valiant sons, Nephi and Sam. He calls them to join him, which they promptly do, and take their share of the fruit. However, Laman and Lemuel refuse to join the rest of the family. They have no desire to enjoy the fruit, which represents the love of God.

When Lehi tells his family of this vision, he shares the sad lesson he has learned. “And behold, because of the thing which I have seen, I have reason to rejoice in the Lord because of Nephi and also of Sam; for I have reason to suppose that they, and also many of their seed, will be saved. But behold, Laman and Lemuel, I fear exceedingly because of you; for behold, methought I saw in my dream, a dark and dreary wilderness.”

He came to understand, through this vision, that accepting God’s love into your life and doing whatever is needed to enjoy the blessings that come from this is a choice. It’s a choice each of us must make for ourselves. We can invite others to partake and we can encourage, plead, and pray, but each person has agency and must choose for herself whether or not to accept the gospel, Heavenly Father, and the Savior as the center of our world. Those who accept will receive blessings beyond measure for eternity. Those who don’t often struggle through life without that guidance, and must cope with the consequences of what comes in the eternities.

We have agency, but it’s our responsibility to use it wisely and with an eye toward eternity.

This post was originally published in May 2008. Minor revisions have been made.

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.

Many years ago, I found myself facing a major change in my life. For three years, life had been unusually peaceful and I was scared of sliding back into a world of changes. I fought the change hard and had to turn to prayer for help. I went weekly during that struggle to the temple, where I took time away from the world to pray in a quiet, Spirit-filled place. As I prayed, the thought came repeatedly to my mind, “If you’re prepared, you don’t need to be afraid.”

I recognized this piece of inspiration as coming from a Latter-day Saint book of scripture called the Doctrine and Covenants (albeit paraphrased), a collection of modern revelations given to Church leaders. This particular section was given to Joseph Smith and delivered at a conference in which the people were told to go to Ohio. I accepted the comfort and set out to prepare myself for the changes that were coming. Then, completely prepared, I sat back and waited for the fear to disappear.

It didn’t.

I kept right on being afraid and fighting against the coming changes. I didn’t understand why I continued to fear when I had done as instructed. Finally, I took it to prayer again, and this time the answer came quickly and clearly — as clearly as if someone were speaking to me. The answer was this: “I said you didn’t need to fear; I didn’t say you couldn’t choose to be afraid.”

God believes in agency. He gives us the right to choose, and we can choose whether to approach life fearfully or faithfully. Fear is a choice and it was what I had chosen. I went to work strengthening my faith and life felt so much better. In time, I understood the purpose of the changes and realized that even though I hadn’t wanted them, I had enjoyed the results of the changes. God knew much better than I did what I needed.

It’s sometimes said that faith is the opposite of fear. When we’re afraid, we aren’t completely putting the situation into God’s hands and trusting Him. What I attempt to keep in mind when I’m trying to overcome fear with faith is remembering that God sees the entire picture, whereas I only see a small bit of it. He is looking at life from an eternal perspective and I am not.

This doesn’t mean that if we have faith we will never have any problems. The story of the world isn’t just about us; it involves everyone who lives on earth at any time. Everything that happens impacts many different lives, all with different needs and plans, and God must juggle all those lives. In addition, people have agency. It is a critical part of God’s plan for us that we’re given the right to make decisions. Those decisions affect our lives and they also affect others who had no control over our decisions. We can choose our actions, but we can’t choose the consequences, nor can we choose who else will be impacted by our decisions. Sometimes our trials are caused by our own decisions and sometimes by the decisions of others; in addition, some things just happen and no one is to blame, as in the case of severe weather or illness. Sometimes God sends trials to help us learn something important. It can help to remember that even Jesus experienced extraordinary levels of suffering despite living a perfect life. Trials are simply a part of every life.

Having trials does not mean God has abandoned us. He is always in charge. While He may not always step in to protect us from our own choices (or even from the choices of others), He has a master plan for all of us, and for each of us individually. The events that occur might not be the ones He would choose if He were micromanaging us, but He will not allow them to derail His overall plan for us. This means God is still in charge, and even when tragedy or trial occurs, we’re still inside the master plan and we will be fine in the eternal scheme of things.

We can’t always control what happens to us but we can choose our reactions to them. This power to choose is why two people can face the same trials and come out with different results. One person who experiences prejudice or poverty will spend his life angry and using this as an excuse. Another will use it to become stronger and overcome the challenges life has given him or go through them with a cheerful attitude. One person with an illness will become demanding and discouraged and another, perhaps after a natural time of grieving, will go on to uplift and strengthen others through her example and courage. One person loses his job and wastes priceless hours blaming his boss, the economy, the government or anyone else who comes to mind; another uses the time to start his own business or upgrade skills.

Having faith in Jesus Christ can help us turn away fear. The more we trust God and Jesus Christ to watch over us and to help us get through our trials, the less frightened we will be by those experiences. We need to prepare ourselves for possible trials physically, mentally, and spiritually. The best time to build a loving relationship with God and to learn to trust Him is before the trial, not during it. In this way, we come into the trials knowing how God interacts in our lives. We have a tradition of obedience that allows us to receive His greatest gifts and we know how to recognize His hand in our lives. We’ve learned how to get answers to our questions and to feel the comfort He sends.

How do we do this? First, we need to set a goal to seek out complete truth and accept it, even if we find it where we don’t expect to. We can do this by believing the promise given in James 1:5, where we are promised that if we need wisdom, we can receive it from God. Then we need to act on that wisdom. We should put aside time each day to read scripture—not just racing through them to meet a goal, but reading them slowly and thoughtfully. If you’ve never read the Bible all the way through, this is a good time to do so. The Book of Mormon testifies of the truthfulness of the Bible and helps strengthen our testimony that Jesus really did live and that He came to earth for everyone, not just those who lived in His small geographical location. Reading this book will bring additional understanding of the Savior’s mission, since it actually discusses this more often than does the Bible.

We need to put time into prayer — not just the ritual repetition of words, but meaningful discussion with God followed by quiet and patience as we wait for answers. If we leap up and go back to everyday life, we may miss the gentle inspiration that follows. In a conversation with another person, when you ask a question, you wait for the answer before leaving the conversation. Prayer requires the same courtesy. Act as though you expect God to answer your question — this is faith.

When we ask God for help, we need to do our share of the effort and we also need to act like we trust Him to come through with the help. For instance, I’m a writer. I’m trying to learn to write fiction and sometimes I get lost. I reach a section of my novel I know I don’t have the skill to carry out. I often turn to God for help with those sections, but then I follow up by going to my bookshelf to read how to do what I need to do. I trust God to help me find the right book, and maybe even to have encouraged me to buy the right book before I knew I needed it. And then I sit at my computer and start typing, even if I don’t yet know what I’m supposed to type. If I’m not at my computer, I can’t write the book and God can’t guide my mind and hands to type the right words. Sitting at my computer is an act of faith that God will come through with the help.

I find it very helpful to try to figure out what God is trying to teach me when I’m facing a frightening trial. When I know what He wants me to learn, I can do my part to learn it, and I also find it easier to have faith. I watch for proof that God is nearby and participating in my trial with me. Knowing He’s nearby and that I can talk the trial over with Him gives me courage to get through the trial. No matter how few people might be in my life at any given moment, I never have to go through a trial alone.

Nervousness or concern is natural, but paralyzing fear can frequently be overcome through faith. The more often we recognize God’s hand in our lives, the easier it will be to trust Him during the next trial. Every trial we handle with faith strengthens our ability to do it even better the next time.

This article was originally published in August 2011. Minor changes have been made.

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.

I read a wonderful talk this morning on the subject of knowing God. Entitled “Knowing God,” It was given in April 1972 by Bernard P. Broadbank at general conference. He shared several Bible scriptures that explain how to know God:

“And hereby we do know that we know him, if we keep his commandments.

“He that saith, I know him, and keepeth not his commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him.

“But whoso keepeth his word, in him verily is the love of God perfected: hereby know we that we are in him.

“He that saith he abideth in him ought himself also so to walk, even as he walked.” (1 John 2:3–6.)

The apostle James said:

“Thou believest that there is one God; thou doest well: the devils also believe, and tremble” (James 2:19).

And what Elder Brockbank said just before sharing these scriptures really caught my attention:

“We can receive eternal life and salvation from knowing the only true God and Jesus Christ, whom he has sent. Many believe that there is a God, many say that they know there is a God, but many do not act like they know God. There is a great difference in believing or knowing that there is a God and in knowing God. When we claim that we know God, it bears great responsibility, and an apostle has given us information to check our knowledge of God.”

I found that to be a very powerful statement to note that many people who say they believe in God don’t act on that belief and that this is because they don’t really know God personally. Knowing God requires work and sacrifice on our part. We can’t just say a few words and move on with our ordinary life. Knowing God is life-changing—eternity-changing, even. We cannot have a loving and personal relationship with God and continue to live the way we did before we knew Him.

This, I believe, is because if we really know God, we know how much He loves us and how intensely He wants us to have a successful “mission” on Earth. We know He knows everything and so we know that if we do what God instructs us to do, everything will go as well as possible. You can’t eliminate all trials, of course—trials help us to grow and to appreciate the good—but we can eliminate the unnecessary ones and we can become a person worthy to stand in God’s presence someday. Elder Brockbank explained:

“Knowing God does not solve life’s problems, but gives purpose and strength to master them. Jesus, with his knowledge of his Heavenly Father, still had his problems to meet and to work out.

 

The answers to knowing God the Eternal Father are found in and through Jesus Christ. Jesus said, ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me’ (John 14:6).”

The Bible lists many commandments and makes it completely clear they must be obeyed. They are, Jesus said, a demonstration of our love for Him. As our relationship with God grows, obedience becomes easier and easier. What once seemed challenging is now seen as a blessing because we have seen the good it did in our lives and we have a stronger desire to honor God’s requests. The more we love someone, the easier it is to serve them — and this is especially true in terms of our love for God.

For an enlightening discussion of how we can learn to know God—really know Him—read the entire talk or watch the video, which is shown at the top of the linked page.

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.

When he was still a teenager, Nephi, the first prophet whose writings we have in the Book of Mormon, was given a vision of the Savior. In 1 Nephi 11:14-21 we read of the birth of the Savior, as seen by young Nephi in the vision:

14 And it came to pass that I saw the heavens open; and an angel came down and stood before me; and he said unto me: Nephi, what beholdest thou?

 

15 And I said unto him: A virgin, most beautiful and fair above all other virgins.

 

16 And he said unto me: Knowest thou the condescension of God?

 

17 And I said unto him: I know that he loveth his children; nevertheless, I do not know the meaning of all things.

 

18 And he said unto me: Behold, the virgin whom thou seest is the mother of the Son of God, after the manner of the flesh.

 

19 And it came to pass that I beheld that she was carried away in the Spirit; and after she had been carried away in the Spirit for the space of a time the angel spake unto me, saying: Look!

 

20 And I looked and beheld the virgin again, bearing a child in her arms.

 

21 And the angel said unto me: Behold the Lamb of God, yea, even the Son of the Eternal Father!

Latter-day Saints know Jesus is the literal son of both Mary and Heavenly Father. His birth was indeed a divine miracle. Elder Bruce R. McConkie taught:

“Just as Jesus is literally the Son of Mary, so he is the personal and literal offspring of God the Eternal Father, who himself is an exalted personage having a tangible body of flesh and bones” (Doctrinal New Testament Commentary, 1:82).

Joseph, a faithful and humble man, was chosen by God to carry out the earthly duties of a father for Jesus: caring for Jesus, teaching Him, and helping Mary to prepare Him for His future mission. He was, essentially, an adoptive father, not the literal, physical father of Jesus.

While there are those who seek to remove the divinity behind the Savior’s birth, we know that to remove the divinity of His birth would also remove the divinity of His life. His mission on earth, to redeem us all, could only be possible if His birth had happened the way the scriptures say they happened—through divine and sacred miracles.

Jesus, like every man who ever lived, must have a father—and that father was God Himself, providing the divinity that made possible the things that Jesus did during His lifetime. While all of us are literal children of God, only Jesus was begotten, with no other father but God. It is because of this, because God was willing to allow His Only Begotten Son to endure the extraordinary trials of the Garden of Gethsemane and the cross, that we can return home and live forever, possibly even in the direct presence of God.

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” – John 3:16

This article was originally published in May 2008. Minor changes (and additions) have been made for timeliness and clarity.

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.

When I hear this, my mind often turns to a scripture found in the Book of Mormon:

And now, my beloved brethren, I perceive that ye ponder still in your hearts; and it grieveth me that I must speak concerning this thing. For if ye would hearken unto the Spirit which teacheth a man to pray ye would know that ye must pray; for the evil spirit teacheth not a man to pray, but teacheth him that he must not pray. (2 Nephi 32:8 in the Book of Mormon)

God knows the truth of everything, and while man might lead you astray, God never will. For this reason, Satan is very afraid of having people pray about truth. Once they receive truth from God, their faith can become so strong he finds it difficult, if not impossible, to reach them. So it’s in his best interests to discourage us from praying—but it’s certainly not in our own best interests. If we’re unwilling to pray about truth, we are forced to trust mere men.

Throughout the Bible, God instructs us to pray. Never does He say to avoid prayer for fear you won’t recognize the answer. The scriptures regularly assure us that if we have faith and learn to know the Father, we will recognize God’s voice.

Have you ever met someone briefly and then, when you met them again, didn’t recognize them? They weren’t recognizable to you because you didn’t know them well. Have you ever developed a close friendship with someone, gotten to know their heart, and then been separated for many years? When you encounter them again, you remember them, even though you haven’t seen them in years. The difference is in how well you know them.

This is how it is in our relationship with God. When we build a relationship with Him as we study the scriptures, ponder in our hearts, and spend time talking to God, His voice becomes more familiar to us. In time, we know Him so well there is no doubt who is speaking to us.

God has given us the ability to recognize His voice through the Light of Christ. When we pray, sincerely seeking truth for all the right reasons and committed to doing whatever God tells us, the Light of Christ will whisper in our hearts that it’s true. Satan can’t bring true peace, so when we feel peace, joy, or contentment, we know the answer is from God.

God wants you to ask Him what is true and He’s prepared to give you an answer you will recognize as His. I know this because I know God can do anything at all, including this, and I’ve tried it.

This article was originally published in July 2008. 

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.

11 For all have not every gift given unto them; for there are many gifts, and to every man is given a gift by the Spirit of God.

 

12 To some is given one, and to some is given another, that all may be profited thereby. (See Doctrine and Covenants 46: 11-12.)

Everyone, male and female, can receive spiritual gifts. The scriptures list many of these gifts and it can be interesting, as we read, to highlight each gift mentioned. The gifts bless the holder of the gifts if he uses them wisely, but they can also be used to bless others. A person who has the gift of faith can use it to find the truth among conflicting and confusing choices. This gift can be used to help that person become a member of the Savior’s Church. It comes to her through the Spirit of Christ. After receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost, her faith grows even more. She might then choose to use that gift to pray for others or to share her faith with those who were not given as strong a gift as she received.

We’re taught that it is appropriate to pray for certain gifts if we are prepared to use them wisely in the service of others rather than to glorify ourselves. A person who is invited to teach a class but lacks the gift to teach can begin to pray for it. In addition to praying, of course, she must do what she can to improve her teaching skills, but God will step in and honor righteous requests if they are part of His plan for us. A prayer to become the greatest teacher in the world is not likely to be honored because this is a prideful request, but a prayer to have the ability to teach the class one has agreed to teach will likely be honored.

The diversity of the human race is one of God’s best ideas! If we all had the same talents, gifts, and assignments, most things wouldn’t get done. The world needs writers, but it doesn’t need everyone to be a writer. It needs gardeners, but everyone doesn’t need a talent for gardening. Because each of us has different talents and passions, everything that needs doing gets done. If we each had all the talents possible in equal proportion, we might find ourselves spread too thin and most things wouldn’t get accomplished. We’d all be doing whatever was easiest or created the most wealth, given human nature.

In the same way, God divided up certain tasks and assigned them to specific genders. Only women were given the ability to give birth. This doesn’t mean God loves men less; it only means that doesn’t happen to be one of the tasks assigned to them. Only men hold the priesthood, but that does not say women aren’t worthy or capable of holding it. Priesthood is an office, not a gender, but assigning it to men keeps it focused, just as assigning childbirth only to women keeps that aspect of life focused.

Within The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, there are a great many tasks to be completed because we have a lay religion and very complex programs. Everyone is asked to take on his or her share of the work. Tasks are assigned in various ways that make the Church run more smoothly. Some are assigned by age: only an eleven, twelve, or thirteen-year-old old girl may serve as a youth leader in the Beehive Program. (Beehives are girls of that age in the Young Women’s program for teenagers.)

Other callings and responsibilities are assigned by gender. For example, only women can serve as Primary or Relief Society presidents. (These are, respectively, the organizations for children and women.) Some tasks are open to anyone who is an adult: anyone may teach the children or the literacy classes, even though only women can lead those programs. Some tasks are assigned by office: only a person who holds the office of a high priest can serve as a bishop (the leader of a congregation). It might appear that the rule is that only men can be bishops, but actually, the rule is that only high priests can be bishops. A good and worthy man who does not hold the office of high priest in the priesthood cannot be a bishop, no matter how qualified he is otherwise.

While it’s true that only men are to hold the priesthood (as we see from even a casual study of the Bible), this does not limit a woman from serving God anymore than not being able to be the Primary president limits a man’s ability to serve God. There are many ways to serve and God does not love the priesthood holders more than the Primary president—or the door greeter. We don’t get bonus points for serving in certain kinds of positions. God asks us to serve wherever He needs us, and, if we do this well, we are blessed for our attitude and willingness to serve, not for the specific task accomplished.

Men holding the priesthood receive no special blessings over the women. It isn’t about power, blessings, or God’s love. Rather, it is about our trust in God and His plan. If we have a testimony that the Savior is at the head of the Church and that He sees with a vision greater than our own, we won’t waste valuable hours of our mortality fretting over what gifts or offices we don’t have. Instead, we’ll work hard to develop those gifts and talents that God has asked us to take on.

As with every other aspect of the gospel, it really comes down to a testimony. How much do you trust God?

When I was first investigating the Church, the priesthood concerned me. As a teenager raised in the 1970s, I thought women’s liberation was what I was supposed to be living (even though I was known for my love of taking care of children). In other words, my nature was fairly traditional—if you leave out housework. The missionaries teaching me, when asked about priesthood during the first lesson, told me they’d be happy to discuss it with me but that I needed more background and training in prayer first.

They asked me to learn to pray and to continue to study, and then we’d discuss it. By the time I was able to understand the answers, I no longer needed to ask the question. I had learned to get my own answers through prayer and I had come to see how much God valued the woman’s place in His kingdom. I understood that being told I had to turn into a man was degrading to women and insulting to God, who created gender. It was no longer a problem for me. I had become proud of the person God created in me.

Over the years, I’ve longed for certain gifts. Some I’ve been able to receive, such as an improved ability to teach, while others were not my calling, such as a desire to sing. Over the years, as I’ve grown and matured, I’ve stopped wasting time fretting over what I don’t have and have begun to be thankful for what I do have. God gave me a most interesting gift box of traits, talents, and experiences. I would be ungrateful and unworthy of those gifts if I wasted my life whining that they weren’t good enough.

This article was originally published in October 2009. Minor changes have been made.

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.

Errol Bennett’s story has often been told among the Saints. He was a top soccer player in Tahiti in the 1970s, one of the best Tahiti has ever known. However, when he began to consider the possibility of becoming a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, soccer became the unexpected challenge in his conversion. Tahiti’s soccer program was not professional, and so players held outside jobs and games were played on Sunday afternoons. This was a long-standing tradition, a natural part of the lives of soccer players and fans.

Whatever feelings the people of Tahiti might have had about Latter-day Saints were eclipsed by their feelings about soccer. Bennett made it clear that if he became a member, he would not play soccer on Sundays.

The scriptures teach that God created the world in six days and then rested on the seventh. Likewise, Latter-day Saints also rest from worldly pursuits on the Sabbath. The Sabbath day—not just the two hours of church attendance, but all day—is spent honoring and serving God. It is a time to draw closer to Him, to worship, to fill the spiritual needs of others. It is not a time for shopping, parties, or working (if it can be avoided). While each person must decide for himself or herself what to do about this commandment, Bennett knew that if he converted, he would not play soccer on Sundays.

His father was angry and upset, even threatening to disown him. On advice from his religious leaders, Bennett went to his father to restore the relationship. The father had already come to the same conclusion and they resolved the problem. However, family and friends continued to pressure Bennett to forego baptism and conversion. The president of the league even contacted the stake president (a leader over a group of congregations) to ask that Bennett be given some kind of special dispensation so it wouldn’t be a sin for Bennett to play on Sundays. Since the Church does not give people permission to disobey the commandments, the stake president politely explained that the choice was entirely Bennett’s. Each person is responsible for his own choices.

Bennett held strong. Having a testimony of the Church, he went ahead with his baptism and resolved to resign from soccer for good. However, the league unexpectedly voted to move all game play to weeknights. This created only a mild uproar, due to Bennett’s popularity. Because Bennett held firm, he was able to end Sabbath gameplay. Even though not all players decided to go to church after this, many commented on how much they appreciated having Sundays for family time.

via lds.org

Several other islands in the area also agreed to end Sunday play as a result of Tahiti’s decision to do so. One player, with the courage to stand his ground, ended one aspect of Sabbath breaking.

It’s true, of course, that most of us would not have been able to get these results. However, we all have areas of influence, and we can make changes. They might not be nationwide, but changing even a small piece of our personal world can have the often-mentioned ripple effect.

Suppose, for instance, you longed for a society in which everyone could read. Some people would have the personality, time, and resources to create a program which would bring literacy to thousands. Most of us would not. Should we do nothing because we can’t help thousands? Of course not!

In our desire to improve the nation’s literacy and with a recognition of our limitations, we could look to the Savior for an example. He did not heal every person in the world while He lived on the earth. He healed those He had access to at the time. He taught only those He had access to. However, those who were healed or who heard and accepted His teachings went out into the world and shared that testimony with a few other people. Those converts also spread the word. Today, a religion that nearly two centuries ago had only a handful of followers has followers in countless numbers worldwide, even though Jesus Himself only taught a few people.

So we might decide to volunteer at a literacy center and teach three people to read. Three might not seem like many when they look at the large numbers of people who cannot read. However, those who are parents will go home and read to their children, which will help their children to become literate, breaking a cycle of illiteracy. Even if those we teach do not influence others, our efforts are not wasted, because we used them to help end illiteracy for three people. Other people will also work on the literacy effort and the combined efforts will lead to a significant reduction in illiteracy.

This principle can be applied to any good thing we wish to do. If we want to end hunger, we feed three people. If we want to improve morality, we train our own children to be moral. If we want the gospel to spread, we share it with our friends, who may go on to share it with their friends. Like the healings Jesus did, our small, individual efforts will unite with the individual efforts of others, and one person at a time, the world can be converted and improved. Whatever our goals, we don’t need to aim for millions alone. We can start with a single person in small, unsung acts of spiritual heroism.

This article was originally published in August 2009. Minor changes have been made. To read more of Terrie’s work, click here.

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.

Brigham Young, the second prophet of the restored Church

Brigham Young had an answer for this question. He’s said to have told people his greatest fear was that people in the Church would start to take what he said as the will of God and not take the time to go to God personally to receive confirmation of it.

Although the Saints are taught to honor their prophets and to follow them, it’s not a blind following. Only God can be completely trusted to always tell you the truth, and only God knows the truth of all things. Latter-day Saints are taught even before they join the Church to pray and ask God if the current prophet really is God’s prophet. Then, afterwards, at any time, they can return to God and ask about specific teachings the prophet has given.

In the case of those hypothetical situations the Saints are always being asked about, a member who reads an article by a Church leader will generally follow this pattern:

Before reading or listening, they pray for the Spirit. This will often tell them what is true while they’re receiving the information. Once they receive the counsel, they place it in context of other teachings they’ve received. For instance, if the prophet said to store food away so you’ll have enough to eat if you lose your job, a member would say, “Oh, I’ve heard that many times before and already know it’s true.” He wouldn’t likely take time to pray about this, since it’s repeated often.

If it’s new counsel, he might compare it to see if it fits in with previous teachings. For instance, prophets often tell us to store wheat. If this were the first time we’d been told to store wheat, we might think to ourselves, “Well, that’s the first time wheat’s been mentioned, but we’ve often been told to store food in general, so I’ll just add that to it.” It fits into previously given counsel.

However, if a member heard entirely new counsel, and just couldn’t quite feel comfortable with it—maybe because it would require him to stop doing something he loved—he could then take it to God in prayer. Following the established pattern for prayer, he would study the problem in his mind, come to a decision (probably based on what he already knows about God and the gospel), and then come to a conclusion. He’d then kneel in prayer and ask God if he’s made the right choice.

Spencer W. Kimball, a past prophet, spoke on the subject of blind faith.

Spencer W. Kimball, the 12th president of the Church

“When men obey commands of a creator, it is not blind obedience….God’s every command is righteous, every directive purposeful, and all for the good of the governed. …

 

Is it blind obedience when one regards the sign “High Voltage-Keep Away” or is it the obedience of faith in the judgment of experts who know the hazard?

 

Is it blind obedience when the air traveler fastens his seat belt as that sign flashes or is it confidence in the experience and wisdom of those who know more of hazards and dangers?

 

Is it blind obedience when the little child gleefully jumps from the table into the strong arms of its smiling father, or is this implicit trust in a loving parent who feels sure of his catch and who loves the child better than life itself? …

 

Is it then blind obedience when we, with our limited vision, elementary knowledge, selfish desires, ulterior motives, and carnal urges, accept and follow the guidance and obey the commands of our loving Father who … created a world for us, loves us, and has planned a constructive program for us, wholly without ulterior motive, whose greatest joy and glory is to “bring to pass the immortality and eternal life” of all his children? [See Moses 1:39.]

 

It is not blind obedience, even without total understanding, to follow a Father who has proved himself.” (”Chapter 13: Obedience Born of Faith in God,” Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Spencer W. Kimball, (2006),135-44

In the case of the hot stove, it’s likely a child touched a hot stove against the advice of a parent at some time in his childhood. Having done so, he learned first that stoves can be hot, and secondly, that parents can be trusted. Over time, as his parents continued to be right about physical danger, it’s likely he stopped feeling the need to touch every stove or try out every dangerous thing. Whereas, as a toddler, he might have heard a parent say the stove was hot, but he had to find out for himself. As an eight-year-old, if his parents told him it was too dangerous to go outside in the current weather conditions, he might obey without first testing, having learned his parents were usually right.

In the same way, Latter-day Saints learn to trust their prophets, and they learn to trust God. A new member is likely to pray about every individual doctrine, but a more seasoned member, having learned that when he prays, God always answers, “Yes, the prophet is right,” no longer needs to do this. He can spend his limited life doing more important things. He saves his confirmation prayers for those situations which leave him uncertain or which require greater sacrifice to carry out.

The current prophet of the Church, President Russell M. Nelson

Being able to turn to God is one way God protects his children from unscrupulous leadership. They need never take anyone’s word for any part of the gospel, but can always go directly to the source. The prophet delivers God’s message and guides the Church, but each member is individually responsible for confirming the truthfulness of what they’re being told.

Someone just learning about the Church through Latter-day Saint missionaries will be taught how to pray almost immediately. Then, after each lesson, he will be asked to pray about it privately to know for himself it’s true, rather than taking the word of the missionaries. This is a critical step in the member’s progression, because someone who does this is far less likely to fall away from the Church in the future. His testimony will be based on a firm foundation—God.

This article was originally published in March 2009. Minor changes have been made for consistency. 

Lead image via Church News. 

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.

Early this spring, we decided to move closer to my husband’s work, since his commute is very long. We wanted to move into our new home before it got cold. Finding a house to rent was my job and I went to work on it. I set a goal to pack everything I wouldn’t need before the move, in order to simplify the whole moving process.

I started out with great enthusiasm. I went through my kitchen and gave some of my supplies to my son, who lived on his own; threw out the ones that weren’t worth giving away; and found new homes for other items. Finally, I packed the remaining items in the room I didn’t foresee needing. I packed a few other things at the same time. However, I soon discovered that finding a house in the price range we had set for ourselves that met all our needs—or even just the critical ones—was not going to be easy. My husband’s office was in a more expensive area. The Holy Ghost vetoed two houses we looked at and liked. I quickly became discouraged and stopped packing.

I faithfully searched for homes several times a day and we visited a number of them. Our patient agent helped me find places to examine and even tried to talk landlords into accepting our rescue cat. I continued to not pack.

Then, about the time I was getting desperate, since summer was coming to an end and yet another perfect house was closed to us due to having a cat, I read an article by LDSBlog’s own Ashley Dewey. Ashley writes on living life as a single adult. This particular article was called “The Power of Goals.”

I started to think about my goal to get much of the house packed early. As I wandered through the house, I saw I hadn’t done a very good job of it. I went to sleep that night thinking about Ashley’s article and my neglected goal.

The next morning I got up and read the article again. Once again, I looked around the house and saw that I was not living up to my commitment to myself.

Why not? We had talked to God about this move, and we and God were in agreement that it was a good thing to do. I had asked Him to help me find the right house and felt that He had agreed to do so. So why, then, was I acting as though I didn’t trust Him to do what He had promised to do? By not packing, I was acting like I thought the move wasn’t going to happen. I remembered a conversation I’d had with a friend a few years ago in which we talked about how important it was to show God we trusted Him. It was time for me to act on that conversation.

Chastened, I got up and found one of the bins we were using for packing. I began gathering decorations, which I certainly didn’t need, and wrapping them. When the bin was full, I returned to my computer. I opened up the website I was using to find a home and found nothing new. I then opened the file of houses I had saved, but had never gone to see. There were four houses in the file and all were in the same town. I wondered if God was trying to tell me that town was where he wanted us. I eliminated two of the houses by reading the ads more carefully, but asked our agent to make appointments to see the other two.

He told us one was only a short-term rental, which we didn’t want, so we reluctantly set out to view the remaining home. The ad didn’t have any interior pictures and had very little information, leading me to presume it was an awful house. However, as we drove through beautiful wooded lands and then farmlands that bordered the neighborhood, we felt at home. After viewing the house from the outside and realizing it was nicer than the picture, we spent the next hour before our appointment checking out the area.

When we returned and met our agent, we walked into the house and I caught my breath. The home was beautiful, with the pale yellow walls I love in homes. It had a large and appealing kitchen, and we loved everything about the house. When the men went outside to examine the shed, I sat on the stairs and did my usual potential home test. I pictured us going through our day in the house. I was able to do it and to feel happy with the vision—something that had been lacking from previous home visits.

We are now getting ready to move into that home. Because I didn’t keep up with my goal, it is a real scramble. I am paying the price for my choices. However, I’m taking with me a valuable reminder: If I trust God—really trust Him—I need to act like it. Ashley wrote, in the article that reminded me to show God I trusted Him, “We may not know what tomorrow will bring, but we need to take control of the things we do have a say in.” I couldn’t make the house or town (or perhaps the church congregation) God wanted me to be in become available sooner, but I could go ahead and get ready so that when it was available, God could show us where it was.

While I don’t usually get such quick results to changing my behavior, I have been reminded that when God and I work together, everything works better. Faith really is an action word.

This article was originally published in August 2014. Minor changes have been made.

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.