The first time around, it was not a great experience. Maybe that is because he was recovering from trauma, and I needed to back off. But this time he is two years older, much more balanced and happier, and it’s going better than ever. I want to share with you some of the things that are making homeschool so much more fun this time around in case you are in the same boat!

Homeschool Field Trips

When my son is feeling well, we take field trips — like, every day. We got memberships to the local zoo and aquarium. And we travel to all the little places we have always wanted to go, but never had time to visit. School really does make you a slave to their schedule. And the beauty of homeschool is you can tailor it and learn through experiences and not just out of books.

At first, I tried to tie all our trips to subjects we were studying. But eventually I relaxed, and I’ve let the adventure be the teacher. I have learned so much doing that. I know we take these educational trips to teach my son, but I am learning too. It’s so fun!

Vision Boards for Homeschool

I am learning so much that is helping me accomplish my goals. This last week for family night, we each made a vision board. We followed the youth goals and created four sections on each of our boards. Then we made goals for each section: Spiritual, Social, Physical, and Intellectual. And as we take these trips, I am gathering data to help me accomplish my own goals.

For example, in my physical goals, I want to move more. These adventures have a lot of walking, and the walking gives me even more energy. And in the intellectual section, I have decided I need to learn all I can so my garden will thrive this year. Again, ideas and suggestions seem to appear as we take our trips. So I am easily accomplishing goals as we learn.

LEGOs

Another aspect of homeschool that I have finally figured out is how my son learns best. He seems to learn best when he is fiddling with something or building LEGOs. So I have started assembling small LEGO projects for him, complete with directions. And as he works to complete that project, I read the parts of the lessons that would have bored him before. He will even listen to me read the scriptures. (That’s a victory right there.)

He is asking questions and retaining information in a new way. And I am so grateful that there is something like LEGO out there to help keep his mind focused and his hands busy. I think by the end of the school year, we may have more LEGOs than I care to admit. But they are worth their weight in gold for the peace they bring to our homeschool. I am not fighting him anymore, and I love it.

Connections

I have tried to connect his interests to our lessons. A blog I read suggested that, and their advice was right on the money. He loves animals right now. So we study them, their habitats, what they eat, how they live. And even though every lesson won’t have a direct connection to animals, with a little creativity, I can usually find something.

Go With the Flow

The biggest change I have made this year is to go with the flow. In the past, I thought I had to be regimented and specific in what activities we did and when. But I’ve learned that education is accumulative.

So if on Tuesday all he wants to do is math, and he is in the zone, we do a week’s worth of math lessons and end for the day. He loves it because it seems to fit how his mind works better, and I love it because we are accomplishing something without any contention.

Find Educational Extras

Along with going with the flow, there are days when history or social studies are truly fascinating to him — so we will spend longer on those subjects and indulge his curiosity. I have found books that support the lessons and that seems to bring things to life for him.

Our history unit is currently studying ancient Egypt. That is a tough one for an 11-year-old boy. But I found a book by scholastic called “You wouldn’t want to be Tutankhamen” that is awesome. It compares our day to theirs and the drawings are hilarious.

I also love this clicking multiplication machine we got from the teacher supply store. My son loves anything that clicks, and it is satisfying for him to hear the click as he finds out if his answer is correct. I love whoever created this. They have a whole line of them for all kinds of math.

I also joined Scholastic. They let us join as if our family homeschool were a regular school. Our home library is much better now that I have them on board. My son gets to choose books like he did at school, and I get some of the teacher perks. It’s a win-win!

Working for a Break

My son loves taking breaks. So we have breaks through the day. We have our adventure, come home for lunch, and get to work. I only get about two hours of real attentive learning out of him per day. And I try to make sure he isn’t getting too restless. When he is, we will pull out a snack, or change locations, or take a break.

I also reward him for working hard with a short day on Friday. Our local school district does this to give teachers some prep time. And since I know his friends will be home from school early, and he needs to socialize, I try to be done by the time they are. This keeps him happy and gives him a chance to see those friends he is missing.

Homeschool Curriculum

Homeschool provides us with the flexibility we need. But it is always something that is changing depending on our needs. I am grateful for The Good and The Beautiful course material. When we realized we had to homeschool, it was too late to join anything online.

To read more of Abby’s articles, click here.

But their books are clearly laid out, easy for me to prep, and interesting. They also focus on faith, keeping the Bible in education, which is something we were missing in public school.

If you are like me and need to homeschool but are worried that it won’t work, try The Good and The Beautiful. They have their language arts courses on PDF that you can download for free to see how you like it.

I hope these ideas have helped you as you try to adapt to your child’s learning style! Homeschool is an adventure and is sometimes a lot of work. But I know you can do it! Just keep yourself organized and prayerful, and Heavenly Father will help you. After all, He supports you in your role as parent of this amazing soul — He will also help you as you help them learn.

Abby Christianson

Abby is capable and caring. She is learning more about Autism and parenthood every day. Having completed training to be an RBT (Registered Behavior Technician) for ABA therapy she is beginning to understand her son. And even though she is the first to admit she makes a lot of mistakes, she is so grateful to be on this journey. She comes from a family with many autistic members. She invites us to join her, as she shares her adventures. She wishes to emphasize that Autism is a difference not a defect. If you or a family member have autism, Abby wants you to know that the challenges can be overcome, and there are blessings in autism. You or your loved one are not sick or broken. Together we will teach the world this new language.

Boredom is a large part of the gift I give to my children as a homeschooling mom. Homeschooling does not take as long as public school does—it generally takes as long as I hear other parents spend helping their children with homework. I try to limit television on school days and keep computer use to tool time instead of play time. That leaves a beautiful, open day! Time to pursue their interests. Time to lay on the grass and watch worms. Time to write and write and write. Time to draw. Time to dance. Time to build a life-size spider web out of yarn. Boredom can be a very messy gift.

I first began to understand the gift of boredom about five years ago. My oldest child was complaining bitterly about her complete and utter lack of library books. This was an emergency. This was an injustice. I was failing her as a mother. She needed to go to the library. I don’t even remember why we hadn’t gone that week, and it had only been one week, despite her dramatic protestations to the contrary. She could not possibly be expected to survive one more day. She was bored. I must have had a good reason for not going. (I needed a reason back then.) Maybe another child was sick. Maybe I was sick. Maybe the car was dead. I don’t know. All I know is that we couldn’t go.

Up until that point, my standard reply to “I’m bored” was a long list of chores. Since they seemed incapable of thinking for themselves and making plans, I was perfectly happy to think and plan for them. This particular child was quite vocal in her explanations as to why chores would not satisfy her particular problem. She then started pacing around the couch where I was sitting, hoping I would sprout wings or change magically into something interesting.

The Miracles That Can Happen When a Child Gets Bored

The other children were playing quietly. The baby was asleep. The only thing standing between me and booked bliss was this bored child. Sigh. At the time, I was reading Shakespeare. I can’t remember what play, but I had my big Shakespeare book out with its beautiful green monogrammed cover and full-page pictures.

As I looked back and forth from my pacing daughter to my book, the baby woke up. That was the end of my “relaxing” for the day. The baby’s diaper was particularly exciting and necessitated a bath and laundry and possibly a sanitation crew for her crib. It was more than 45 minutes before I walked back through the living room. I noticed the quiet first. In all of the intervening time, not once had my daughter pestered me. Perhaps she had been afraid to come too close to the disaster area, lest I enlist her aid? I found her sitting on the couch committing a cardinal sin in our family: she had stolen my book.

To read more of Britt’s articles, click here.

Why do we think it’s bad to be bored, anyway? I want my children to be comfortable with themselves. Empty time is a gift. What is time to study the path of an earthworm to a budding biologist? What is time and paper to a writer? What is time to study the feeling of movement to a dancer? What good is an empty sketch book to an artist who is constantly entertained or over-scheduled? I don’t know what the life-size spider web of yarn taught anyone, but it was definitely creative and that child was no longer suffering from boredom. When my children say “I’m bored,” I no longer feel that I am lacking as their private entertainment committee. I don’t wonder if we should have a more scheduled life. I do say, “I can’t wait to see what creative things you are going to think up to do in this gift of time!”

This post was originally published in January 2014. Minor changes have been made.

Britt Kelly

Britt grew up in a family of six brothers and one sister and gained a bonus sister later. She camped in the High Sierras, canoed down the Colorado, and played volleyball at Brigham Young University. She then served a mission to South Africa.

With all of her time in the gym and the mountains and South Africa, she was totally prepared to become the mother of 2 sons and soon to be 9 daughters. By totally prepared she means willing to love them and muddle through everything else in a partially sleepless state. She is mostly successful at figuring out how to keep the baby clothed, or at least diapered, though her current toddler is challenging this skill.

She feels children naturally love to learn and didn’t want to disrupt childhood curiosity with worksheets and school bells. She loves to play in the dirt, read books, go on adventures, watch her children discover new things, and mentor her children. Her oldest child is currently at a community college and her oldest son is going to high school at a public school. She loves to follow her children in their unique paths and interests.

She loves to write because, unlike the laundry and the dishes, writing stays done. Whenever someone asks her how she does it all she wonders what in the world they think she’s doing.

When my son started refusing to go to school, he was very small, so I just put on his shoes and carried him to the car. But as he got older, it became more difficult. The school administrators and teachers made it sound like it was just a matter of being firm about him attending, and that he would go with enough coaxing.

But they had no idea what was happening in our house. Having a diagnosis now gives me the strength to keep fighting—and makes me angry at all those who made me out to be the bad guy all these years! Now that I have answers, I want to share them in the hope that I can help you if our story sounds familiar.

Long History of Trouble

Ever since my son was in preschool, he resisted going to school. As I said before, when he was small, it was easy to just pick him up and put him in the car. Now that he is 9 years old and 100 pounds, it’s not so easy. He would scream, cry, and throw royal tantrums, refusing the whole time to go to school. He would pretend that he was sick and learned to be very convincing. In first grade, I dragged him in one day only to have him fake vomit in the trash can. His teacher immediately sent him home.

At home, he would fake vomit in the trash can, and I had to start smelling it because he could fake it so well. (It was usually a mouth full of water.) By second grade, he had perfected a fake fever and fake flu symptoms. It was always the stuff you couldn’t prove that he excelled at. The headache, stomach ache, and sore throat were his favorite excuses to stay home sick. It would start the night before, and only get more dramatic as the time for school got closer.

Tantrums

There were times he would pound his fists and shout that he was NOT going to school. There was nothing I could do. I tried going to school with him. In first grade, I was a first grader for an entire week. I sat in the room and just my presence helped, but as soon as I was gone, the trouble started again. So I volunteered in the lunch room. I hoped that being at lunch would give my son something to look forward to, and it eased his tension for a time. But it would always come back.

As he got older, his teachers were no longer patient with my presence at school. His second-grade teacher was a very firm woman with clear expectations for her class. I was not allowed to volunteer and had to say goodbye at the door. Things began to get worse.

My son was missing more and more school. I had tried rewards, bargaining, yelling, and even punishments. Nothing worked! To make matters worse, this battle of wills was destroying our relationship. Our family was full of tension and my relationship with my son was at a breaking point.

Breaking Point

At this time, his teacher showed up to a 504 meeting all smiles and light only to send me a page long email of her complaints about my son’s behavior later that afternoon. It was at that point that I was done. I couldn’t take another day of school refusal. So I pulled him out of school. He was halfway through second grade. For the next year and a half, we did homeschool—and the whole house heaved a sigh of relief.

We had varying levels of success. I have great respect for homeschool families; I really admire all they do for their children. For us, the great gift of home school was that it mended our family relationships. My son and I became friends again and the terrible tension that had been in our home 24/7 disappeared. I loved the peace and love that grew in place of the frustration and hurt that was there before. I loved that experience.

Getting Answers

But in time, he outgrew homeschool. He missed having friends to play with. So we started a new school. It was a private school just for kids on the Autism spectrum, with wonderful staff. It was the perfect place for him to be. But he was STILL acting like he was being sent to his death every morning. We are blessed with a wonderful team who took some time to educate me on the clinical diagnosis of School Refusal. I learned that there are four main causes for school refusal.

#1: Fear of Something That is Happening at School

This would be your tests, presentations, giving a speech, concert, etc.

#2: Fear of Someone AT School

Bullies, peer pressure, and even a severe teacher fall into this category.

#3: Desire to Spend Time with Mom or Dad

Let’s be honest—spending time with parents can be fun! Some kids have separation anxiety, and that can make staying home very appealing.

#4: Desire to Stay Home and Do Something Else Besides School

Wanting to stay home and play Xbox, watch TV, or work on a hobby you love.

To read more of Abby’s articles, click here.

After learning about these reasons for school refusal, I was DEEPLY discouraged. My son has ALL of those reasons for refusing to go to school. He is a tough case. But his team at school is ingenious! They have found ways to help him overcome each issue.

It’s a balancing act. But we are a team and we work on the fly sometimes. Each time something new comes up, we are learning to talk it out with my son. Each problem requires a different solution. Often, it is just communicating the concern that will help his anxiety.

Stay tuned for my next article so I can tell you how we came up with some solutions that are really helping—and hopefully you can adapt some of them for your situation.

Abby Christianson

Abby is capable and caring. She is learning more about Autism and parenthood every day. Having completed training to be an RBT (Registered Behavior Technician) for ABA therapy she is beginning to understand her son. And even though she is the first to admit she makes a lot of mistakes, she is so grateful to be on this journey. She comes from a family with many autistic members. She invites us to join her, as she shares her adventures. She wishes to emphasize that Autism is a difference not a defect. If you or a family member have autism, Abby wants you to know that the challenges can be overcome, and there are blessings in autism. You or your loved one are not sick or broken. Together we will teach the world this new language.

Homeschooling is growing in popularity among all religions, and even becoming popular with the non-religious community. Homeschooling for religious purposes is no longer listed as the main reason for homeschooling. The primary reason for homeschooling is to give children a superior education. However, even those LDS parents who homeschool for academic reasons often want to incorporate their religion into their school. This is very easy to do, and will not impede the ability to teach a full academic curriculum. Many of your regular homeschooling activities can also incorporate religious activities.

Reading

Reading the scriptures will give your child a very large reading vocabulary, since they were not written for children. In addition, they will be able to read well when called on to read in Primary. The scriptures should not be the only reading material, of course. Children need to be exposed to a large library of books, so use the scriptures as one part of your reading day. When you read other books, talk about them in terms of LDS beliefs. Have the characters made good choices? What would the prophet advise them to do? When you read books about people who belong to other religions, discuss the similarities and differences in the religions, and how those differences affect the choices people make. Talk about respect for other faiths.

Writing

There are many ways to incorporate your religion into your writing day. I know of one family who is re-writing the Book of Mormon. They aren’t changing anything but the language–simply writing it in more modern terms, or perhaps summarizing.  However, you could also have children write it as a novel, a play or a script. If an entire book of scripture is too ambitious, invite your children to choose their favorite scripture story and put it into another format.  Read the story with the children many times and discuss it. What would the scenery look like? What sort of person was this? While Lehi was preaching, what were Laman and Lemuel doing as they sat in the tent? What was Nephi doing? What were they thinking and how could you show that by their actions and facial expressions? Do, however, expect them to treat the stories and the people with respect. These are scriptures, after all.

Children are often assigned talks in Primary or Sacrament meeting. Writing a talk is a good educational experience, as is, of course, giving the talk. Teach children how to write their own talks and do the writing during school hours. (For help see A Child’s First Talk This method can be adapted to older children. Gradually, they should do more and more on their own.

Have your children study the types of stories that appear in church magazines. (These can be found online at LDS.org in the Gospel Library.) Encourage them to create their own family magazine on a quarterly basis. They should choose gospel principles that they want to teach and then create a story that will teach the principle in a fun way. Remind them that children should solve their own problems in the stories. The Friend also has games, recipes and crafts and they can create those as well, since writing instructions is an important form of writing. They can put the magazine on the computer and create a web page or print it and mail it to family and friends. This also teaches art, history and various other subjects, including computer skills and business management.

Math

Try writing your own story problems based on gospel principles or scripture stories. For example:

“Sariah was cooking for her family in the wilderness. Nephi and Sam had gathered five pounds of vegetables for her. She cooked two pounds of them. How many are left over for the next meal?”

“Noah was gathering animals to go on the ark. He gathered two of each kind. If he gathered ten types of animals in one hour, how many animals did he gather all together that hour?”

Tie these to the story you are currently reading to help children remember the story and to make the people seem more real. The children can also create stories based on the scriptures they are reading.

History

History is a wonderful place to tie in religion. When reading a time period that is covered in the scriptures, read the scriptures simultaneously. It can be quite enlightening to see how history and scripture combine, or even conflict.

What do you do when your history text doesn’t agree with your religious beliefs? Often, history books present Latter-day Saints in a very negative manner and often contain falsehoods. I never use straight textbooks until my children are able to read at a college level, allowing me to select only those books that present the viewpoint I want. When my children are in middle school, I do let them know how outsiders sometimes view us. By then, they are old enough to discuss this problem. Help your children to understand how such stories get spread and what motivations the storytellers might have had in choosing a falsehood.

LDS publishers have begun writing excellent books about Latter-day Saints during various times in history. Use these as supplements, not the entire unit, when teaching history to your children. Older children need to use books that are not written from an LDS perspective as well, because they will encounter other perspectives in college. You do not want them to first hear these ideas from someone who can’t explain them from an LDS point of view.

You might try having your children study the church leaders of modern time periods in history and what was going on in the church during various events. Let them write stories about LDS children who lived during the time.

Science

Science gets a little tricky when you are covering creation and a few Biblical events. As with history challenges, it is best to tell your children what the outside world says and then tell them what you believe. Children generally believe whatever they hear first and learn at a young age. If they go to college and hear of evolution for the first time, they will believe you lied to them or hid things, and they will wonder why. This caused a tremendous crisis in faith for some of my Christian friends in college who had gone to religious schools.

The church does not take a stand on how long it took to create the world. The Hebrew word used, yom, can mean day, time or period. Therefore we don’t really know how long it took and it actually doesn’t matter. God wasn’t writing a how-to manual when he had the account of the creation written. Joseph Smith said: “The word create came from the [Hebrew] word baurau which does not mean to create out of nothing; it means to organize; the same as a man would organize materials and build a ship. Hence, we infer that God had materials to organize the world out of chaos——chaotic matter” (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, sel. Joseph Fielding Smith [1976], 350-51).

To read more of Terrie’s articles, click the picture.

Because we have few details to work with, this can be an interesting and challenging topic to research as a family. Go to LDS.org, the official church site. Click on search and then on search gospel library. Type in the word creation. Many choices come up. Assign children to read the articles in the magazines and manuals they are old enough to understand. Then plan a family home evening on the subject in which everyone presents their findings and decides what they think happened. Remind them that how the creation happened is not actually the important part of the story. What matters is that it did happen and the reason it happened.

The Institute of Religion Manual is a great place to start your research on creation. It has a great deal of information on science and creation.

This approach can be used whenever you find a conflict.

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.

The question ‘Should I home-school my child?’ has crossed many a parents’ mind over the course of most children’s lives.  In the last ten years, many parents have considered homeschooling their children for many reasons, one being financial cuts to school districts. State budget cuts are digging into county school funds and many schools have cut the arts, foreign languages and even core classes causing over crowding in the classroom in order to keep their school districts from going under.

Another reason could be the curriculum used for public or private school. The onslaught of Common Core has parents scrambling to find a better way to educating their children at home.

Nevertheless, there are many reasons parents decide to take on the total responsibility of educating their children as many parents have done before them.  Let’s look at a few:

• From Birth: Some parents know instinctively from the birth of their child that they are going to home-school.  No if, ands or buts; they are converted from the beginning that the home-school lifestyle is for them and they plan from day one to take on the responsibility of teaching their own child.

• Public School Trial: Some parents are happy sending their children to public school during the kindergarten or 1st grade period and then realize that their child’s personality has transformed from the “sweet child” they knew before public school to the “survival child” public school sometimes forces children to become.  It doesn’t always happen that way.  Some children have to learn to defend themselves at school and this amazing transformation takes place which leaves parents baffled at what happened to their children.  When a parent realizes what affect public school has in their families, they immediately withdraw their children.  I have witnessed this many times.

• Temporary Withdrawal:  Some parents feel it necessary to withdraw their children from public school for a short time all the while thinking that they will send their child back.  This type of withdrawal is usually during the junior high school period when children are particularly cruel to each other and life at school is unbearable. In many cases, children are sent back to start high school but if both parties are in agreement, the child will finish out on his/her own at home.

• Education Crisis: There are some cases where parents pull out their children after troubles with a public school teacher, behavioral problems with the child or with the other children and their own child in the classroom.  There could be grade deficiencies, or lack of challenge in a curriculum which causes the child to be bored out of his mind. With Common Core curriculum, children are often frustrated with learning and parents disagree with the appropriateness of what is learned.

The reason to home-school could be because the child feels like a round peg being pushed into a square hole.  With some budget cuts to school districts some classes have suddenly doubled in size because of lack of teachers.  This happened to us when my daughter started her freshman year in public school. The budget had been cut that summer and on the first day of class they rearranged how the class schedule would run for everyone leaving my daughter in a class of 40 students instead of 20 which was originally planned.

To read more of Valerie’s articles, click here.

Whatever the crisis parents find themselves in, home-school invariably finds its way as a solution for many problems. The lifestyle of home-schoolers has helped many children stay grounded and close to their families.  They receive more parental guidance since they are at home more often than public school children and many times retain good study habits. Parental training and attention is a stabilizer in a child’s life and in many instances it’s what children need in these turbulent times.

Valerie Steimle

Valerie Steimle has been writing as a family advocate for over 25 years. As a convert to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, she promotes Christian living in her writings and is the mother of nine children and grandmother to twelve. Mrs. Steimle authored six books and is a contributing writer to several online websites. To her, time is the most precious commodity we have and knows we should spend it wisely.
To read more of Valerie’s work, visit her at her website, The Blessings of Family Life.

Frequently, after a few days of unscheduled, all kid, crazy weather days of spring break, I hear people say they could never handle having their children home all the time. They are sure they could never homeschool. Homeschool is not one big long spring break. I promise. Here are some differences:

1- The schedule — For spring break, bed time is relaxed, alarms are turned off, breakfast is a more concrete event and screen time can become more of a free for all. Chores change to big projects. If your spring break looks like this, it generally starts out relaxing and becomes…grumpy. Homeschool does not require bells and timers, but it does require some structure. What that looks like will vary  by family, but children and parents both function best with regular sleep and limited time with screens used for entertainment. Even that minor adjustment completely alters the environment.

2- The field trip — Perhaps you pack your children up and go to a museum and wonder how home-schoolers do it. We don’t go on spring break. We go when museums are empty. I seldom take all of my children to a museum. I have found that going as a homeschool group or with my whole family doesn’t work. It’s stressful, it’s crowd control, it’s rushing some people and slowing down others. I prefer taking my children to museums one-on-one. It’s fascinating what they talk about and how they spend their time. They tend not to explore the entire museum, they find what they like and spend a bulk of their time there. The conversation to and from the museum is again not crowd control or screen time, but listening to them and learning what’s going on in their minds. One child and one parent in a nearly quiet museum is completely different than the whole family on spring break. I also don’t plan something major every day of the week, or three days a week.

3-The transition — If you did decide to pull your children from public school, there is generally a transition time. Children and parents need to adjust to a new schedule, and a new concept of what learning looks like. There is an adjustment as parents learn what their ideal of homeschool compares with reality. Frequently homeschooling parents  start with doing school at home, which then adjusts to what works best for this particular child and family. Parents develop their own concept of education and goals.

None of that looks like spring break…even if you want to add a little learning into your spring break. Frequently a little learning just looks like homework for your children. It is seldom a shift of philosophy or family structure. You and your child are still relying on school as their major source of education.

4- Parental expectations — spring break means something to adults as well. We have our own expectations.We do not look at it as a return to normal family life with our children all home. Perhaps we ourselves want more excitement or vacations or traveling or entertainment. Homeschool becomes a new normal.

Whether or not you homeschool is mostly a philosophical choice. There are practical considerations, but they are not based on what you have done with your children, but on what you will do. In other major family decisions, I have noticed that a need of a child brings out the amazing in the parents. We get our child to the appointments they need, we change their diets, become experts in that child. We stay up all night with sick children, we suddenly learn to love, appreciate or at least drive to the sport or art or interest they love. If homeschool is right for your child, you will become what they need. You may not become your image of the “perfect homeschool parent”. You will not have 5 perfect homeschool days a week — most school teachers will tell you they don’t have perfect school days every day either.

Britt Kelly

Britt grew up in a family of six brothers and one sister and gained a bonus sister later. She camped in the High Sierras, canoed down the Colorado, and played volleyball at Brigham Young University. She then served a mission to South Africa.

With all of her time in the gym and the mountains and South Africa, she was totally prepared to become the mother of 2 sons and soon to be 9 daughters. By totally prepared she means willing to love them and muddle through everything else in a partially sleepless state. She is mostly successful at figuring out how to keep the baby clothed, or at least diapered, though her current toddler is challenging this skill.

She feels children naturally love to learn and didn’t want to disrupt childhood curiosity with worksheets and school bells. She loves to play in the dirt, read books, go on adventures, watch her children discover new things, and mentor her children. Her oldest child is currently at a community college and her oldest son is going to high school at a public school. She loves to follow her children in their unique paths and interests.

She loves to write because, unlike the laundry and the dishes, writing stays done. Whenever someone asks her how she does it all she wonders what in the world they think she’s doing.

5 AM: wake up to go to seminary. I realize the baby was up at some point during the night and is asleep on the couch. Thank you, husband, for getting her back to sleep. I move her to our bed in hopes that she sleeps through the children getting up, who are as loud and graceful as a herd of high heel wearing elephants.

Drive to seminary. I run out of gas. I immediately knew what the distraction was. The afternoon before on the way home from Shakespeare try outs, my children were talking about who each of the characters in the Tempest would be in the Batman universe. Once you decide Prospero is Ra’s al Ghul, it just falls into place, if you are my children and their friends.

I discover that I have left my phone at home and my 17 year old and I  will be walking to a gas station to buy a gas can and gas. We learn some important things, like a woman five months pregnant can still run, if a car is speeding up to run you down and the honking of the other cars isn’t stopping it. We also learned people can still be wonderful. Someone lent us a gas can and drove us back to our van.

Breakfast: pumpkin muffins and fruit.

I read some books to the three little girls.

After breakfast we have a piano lesson with 13 year old . We are beginning more earnest work on her sight reading.

We hit the sweet spot of the morning. 13 year old keeps practicing piano for 45 minutes. 17 year old is typing on her book. 11 year old is typing on his book. 7 year old is on the couch with me doing phonics. 2 year old is coloring next to us. 4 year old is “doing the dishes”. The 9 year olds are having “twin time”.

I read with one 9 year old, who is still working on reading skills.

I deal with crazy insurance guy and shower while lunch is supposed to be made.

The front room is cleaned, lunch is actually started and I leave to my midwife appointment. I noticed that one of the little people has decided to sort a couple of handfuls of cat food by color. The fish one is, for whatever reason, the most popular. At the appointment, the baby is kicking and happy and healthy and I’m definitely getting bigger.

I come home and wait for their show to end.

Learning at Home
To read more of Britt’s articles, click the picture.

We go outside for a spot of kid school. We are reading The Jungle Book and last night while reading we noticed that Kala Nag, the elephant in one of the later stories, had a stride of 8 feet. We measured that out and compared our strides to Kala Nags. 11-year-old even gets the 2 year old  to walk the 8 feet, she takes 8 steps. We tried to jump 8 feet; by we I mean they. I may be able to run, but I can’t jump 8 feet.

We go back inside and 13 year old starts typing.

A vase of wild flowers for mom. 7 year old asks how big the baby is and how big the baby is going to be.

We relax, read books, have dinner and handle youth activities.

Britt Kelly

Britt grew up in a family of six brothers and one sister and gained a bonus sister later. She camped in the High Sierras, canoed down the Colorado, and played volleyball at Brigham Young University. She then served a mission to South Africa.

With all of her time in the gym and the mountains and South Africa, she was totally prepared to become the mother of 2 sons and soon to be 9 daughters. By totally prepared she means willing to love them and muddle through everything else in a partially sleepless state. She is mostly successful at figuring out how to keep the baby clothed, or at least diapered, though her current toddler is challenging this skill.

She feels children naturally love to learn and didn’t want to disrupt childhood curiosity with worksheets and school bells. She loves to play in the dirt, read books, go on adventures, watch her children discover new things, and mentor her children. Her oldest child is currently at a community college and her oldest son is going to high school at a public school. She loves to follow her children in their unique paths and interests.

She loves to write because, unlike the laundry and the dishes, writing stays done. Whenever someone asks her how she does it all she wonders what in the world they think she’s doing.

I am watching in my son the death of love of learning. Death by paperwork. The sheer volume of “copy and paste” worksheets (find answer in book, insert in blank space) is exhausting him.

I’ve watched him talk about remembering before a test that he needs to choose the correct answer, not the right answer-his version of explaining that he needs to answer what the teacher wants or what the book says, instead of what he really thinks is right.

I’ve watched him, exhausted, as he tries to understand what the teacher wants when they haven’t explained it well (or perhaps explained it better in another class), or it’s unnecessarily complicated. In some cases the work is not meaningful and he assumes it will be so he doesn’t understand it until he recognizes…..oh this is just stupid.

I’ve watched him attempt to cram his interest in a subject into a multiple choice test, and watch his innate love for that subject slowly die.

I’ve watched him try to do every single thing the teachers want.

I’ve watched him become exhausted because he sits all day long, passively listening as the teachers try desperately to cover everything they are supposed to cover to stay on schedule.

I didn’t start this process not liking public school. I’ve never thought it’s the best way to educate–that will always be one-on-one with great books. But I thought public school is necessary and we need a literate, educated populace. We do need that. But is this really how we get there? Is the sheer volume of busy work supposed to be a fit substitute for thinking?

In our homeschool we spend a lot of time reading great books and discussing them. Sometimes we do an activity or craft or go on a field trip related to the book. We do some math. I have found that this…is plenty! I have found that it meets the educational needs of my children. They flourish! The have time for their passions and in delving into them, their learning explodes! They are well prepared for college. They can write and read and do the math they need. They love learning and love reading. This works very well for us. This is what I have used to prepare my son for high school. Doing these basic things, he could slip seamlessly in with students who have spent hours and hours and hours and hours on homework. Why?

Over and over I have found that what we want is an engaged student. It’s an educationese buzzword. Engage all of the students in learning. Use different learning styles, try different modes…although I agree that students have different learning styles and interests, I do not think we understand what an engaged learner looks like.

I have found that the child, even the young child, running around the room, is still listening to the discussion. I have found the child making daisy chains at the edge of the group has great thoughts going on in their head related to what the “engaged” group is doing. Rarely do my children stare at me in rapt attention as I speak (which is what most educator administrators I’ve spoken with assume is engaged). Frequently they doodle, play with Legos or playdough, knit, or in other ways have busy hands. Their minds are engaged and I trust that, because I know from private conversation that even those children who never enter the discussion verbally have entered the discussion in their mind. They didn’t do a book report to prove it. They didn’t overanalyze the symbolism of the author’s every word. They are thinking about friendship, war, why people make the choices they do, how we decide to go to war, what peace really looks like, what love really looks like, what maturity is, how we can relate to people who are different than us, what leadership looks like…they have the ponder time to think those thoughts and they are encouraged by the discussion around them.

Do we really think such thoughts can be encouraged with a multiple choice test and copy and paste worksheets? When a child is having these thoughts, what does it mean when we tell them that what is really important is which of the four themes on the multiple choice test is most correct for this book? How do we teach and examine in bulk?

I know teachers want to teach children to think. I know this. I married a teacher who wants this. But how do you do that and grade them every 6 weeks? Most schools want something gradable almost every day of class. How do you allow for ponder time and provide enough homework to keep parents and administrators off your back? The pressure is real. My husband gave exceptionally minimal homework one year and the pressure from the parents and principal was intense. The children still learned. They were thinking. Most of their homework was to discuss with their parents and family some of what they were learning. They were writing. They did fabulously on the state test. It wasn’t enough. My husband lost his job.

Learning at Home
To read more of Britt’s articles, click the picture.

Now with our son: he may stay in public school. That may be what he needs for…clearly not for learning…so perhaps some other reason. We will attempt to nurture his love of learning out of the classroom, and keep a small twig’s worth alive. Somehow. We will attempt to maintain his relationships with his siblings, though I am watching those change dramatically as well. Seeing the difference is difficult. And sad. He’s turning into a teenager who cares about friends and today and things…instead of the young man I once knew who cared about family and friends, the future, and ideas.

When I spoke with my son he said, “At least my education is going well.” He’s getting all A’s and 1 B he plans on bringing up to an A. That’s what he meant by education. When I ask what he’s learning, he talks about tests and quizzes. I asked about the book he’s reading,“To Kill a Mockingbird.” He talked about interrupting his reading to search for the vocabulary words the teacher identified.

He used to talk about ideas.

Britt Kelly

Britt grew up in a family of six brothers and one sister and gained a bonus sister later. She camped in the High Sierras, canoed down the Colorado, and played volleyball at Brigham Young University. She then served a mission to South Africa.

With all of her time in the gym and the mountains and South Africa, she was totally prepared to become the mother of 2 sons and soon to be 9 daughters. By totally prepared she means willing to love them and muddle through everything else in a partially sleepless state. She is mostly successful at figuring out how to keep the baby clothed, or at least diapered, though her current toddler is challenging this skill.

She feels children naturally love to learn and didn’t want to disrupt childhood curiosity with worksheets and school bells. She loves to play in the dirt, read books, go on adventures, watch her children discover new things, and mentor her children. Her oldest child is currently at a community college and her oldest son is going to high school at a public school. She loves to follow her children in their unique paths and interests.

She loves to write because, unlike the laundry and the dishes, writing stays done. Whenever someone asks her how she does it all she wonders what in the world they think she’s doing.

The first week I homeschooled my two youngest children, who were in second and third grade that year, we gathered up all their dinosaur picture books. We assigned each one a number and wrote the number across the top of the chalkboard. We then turned that into a chart, with the downward spaces as a place to write facts. The facts were written on the left hand side. Then lines created boxes under each source book. The children opened the first book and started to read out loud, taking turns. Each time we encountered a fact, we added it to our chart with a page number.

When we finished the book, we started the second book. If we encountered a new fact, we added it to the chart. If we found the same fact in that book we’d found in the first, we put a checkmark in the square that indicated the correct book and fact. However, if the book contradicted the first book, we’d put a question mark and note the page on which the contradiction occurred. We continued through all ten picture books. (We skipped the chapter books in the interest of time.)

Long before we finished the chart, we noticed one book had question marks in almost every space. After we were done, we went to more adult sources written by qualified experts, and began evaluating the question marked facts. Before long, the children decided, on their own, to throw away the questionable book. Too much of its information was inaccurate. They were on their way to learning to evaluate sources.

As they became older, we added more sophisticated methods of evaluating sources. Following are some of the ways we considered whether or not a source was valid:

1. What are the author’s qualifications?

I am not a person who thinks you need a degree in order to be qualified, but I do at least notice whether or not the author has one. Having one doesn’t mean he is ethical in his writing on a subject, but not having one doesn’t mean he doesn’t know the subject well. It’s just a starting place.

If there is no degree, though, I want to know what did qualify the author to write on the subject. Has he written other books or articles on this topic? How were those received by qualified reviewers? Does he have the respect of the community that specializes in his field? Does he use serious sources that show he has really read the right material? Does he have personal experience with the topic?

2. What are his biases?

This is a great project for your homeschoolers to tackle. To figure it out, they will need to do some serious research on the author. They need to find out something about his life and his other writings. For instance, if someone is writing about Mormonism, you want to know what his connection to Mormonism is. Is he a strong and loyal Mormon? Is he a former Mormon? Has he built a following by attacking the church? Is he a scholar whose writings contain a fair and balanced analysis?

Having a bias doesn’t necessarily mean you can’t use the person as a resource, but your student needs to know it exists. A person who is biased, whether for or against a subject, will naturally select among facts that support his view. This means that if you are looking to write a paper that presents the same view, you are fine. If you are trying to write a balanced article, you’ll also need to find people whose bias goes the other way, as well as people who try not to be biased.

3. Does the source contain loaded language?

Compare the following three sentences:

Joe Martin spent two hours manipulating his gullible audience into believing there was some sort of desperate need for a new museum on mashed potatoes.

And:

Joe Martin’s carefully thought out presentation on the new potato museum was an enlightening look at the history of potatoes and its critical role in our town’s history.

And finally:

Joe Martin gave a speech on the forthcoming potato museum last Tuesday.

Each of these sentences gives the same basic information, but in very different ways. We can see the first writer hated the museum (and its supporters) and wanted to influence his readers to do the same. The second supported the museum and wanted his readers to do the same. The third was a neutral statement of facts.

Give your children several articles on the same topic, written in different ways—for, against, and neutral. Ask them to go through each one and mark manipulative words and sentences. Then discuss how the author has used words and information choices to influence their thinking. After they do this enough times, they will find it impossible to read without noting loaded language. Again, whether or not the bias is good depends on your goal in teaching the topic—but you need to know loaded language exists and what impact it has on the reader.

4. Does the author source his information?

Many writers, particularly on the Internet, write articles, books, and entire websites without telling you where they got their information. “Sixty percent of all Martians live on peanut butter.” Anyone can make up a statistic or fact. Does your source tell you where he got that number? If not, be suspicious.

Be suspicious of anonymous sources, as well. There are rules responsible writers follow when using an anonymous source. This page by the Associated Press is enlightening in helping students learn what a responsible journalist should do. When quoting an anonymous source, there are still certain rules to be followed, in order to help the reader decide how valid the information might be:

The story also must provide attribution that establishes the source’s credibility; simply quoting “a source” is not allowed. We should be as descriptive as possible: “according to top White House aides” or “a senior official in the British Foreign Office.” The description of a source must never be altered without consulting the reporter.

When a source is given, always follow it up. Go to the source and read it. Seeing the quote in context can impact how you feel about it. As often as possible, get your information from the original source, not from someone who is quoting it.

5. Checking the Context of Information

Above, I mentioned seeing the quote or information in context. This is critical, because irresponsible writers often quote a small portion of a quote that means something entirely different from what the writer really said. For instance, one reporter might write:

Children’s author Bob Malarky recently shocked readers by saying, in his new book, “I hate children.”

However, a wise reader will go get the book from the library and look up that quote. They might find only a portion of the sentence was quoted: “I hate children who bully others. I wish we did a better job of teaching children to be kind.”

Another form of emotional manipulation is to leave out the context. One popular discussion that requires context is the Apostle Paul’s comments on marriage. Taken out of context, it seems like Paul is very opposed to marriage. However, this page has some discussion on the topic that, when placed in the context of the time and audience, makes his words seem very different. Scroll down to the second question on the page:

I Have a Question

Teaching your children to do responsible and accurate research is a critical part of education. It will protect them all their lives, particularly as new technology makes it easier and easier for irresponsible people to put out false information. Knowing how to evaluate their sources will help them choose the best sources for the research they are doing. It’s hard work—but it can be a lot of fun. There is a certain amount of satisfaction in uncovering the fact that someone has been trying to trick you!

Terrie Lynn Bittner

The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.

9:15-11am: Hands-on Multidisciplinary Activity

This activity engages youth of multiple ages and is facilitated by the teacher-mentor. This activity emphasizes both fine and gross motor skills and is adapted to the abilities of the individual learner

Math skills and concepts utilized included: understanding the difference between quantity and volume; estimating length; understanding fractions (1/3, 1/2, 1); estimating diameter and circumference.

Science skills and concepts utilized include: (biology) classification based on leaves and woody stems; (physics) spatial reasoning.

Social learning skills practiced during this session include: cooperation; bargaining; taking turns; following directions; problem solving (individual and group); focused time on task; taking satisfaction in completed tasks.

Social studies concepts utilized include: (philosophy) the reasoning behind individual preferences; (government) comparative government forms and their practical applications; (community life) the roles of community workers.

What our homeschool morning was like in everyday language:

9:15-11am yard work

We were eliminating a few bushes that had mistakenly assumed our yard was accepting all comers. Not true. We were also trimming other bushes to make them…pretty. This involved recognizing what we wanted and what we didn’t and only trimming away what we didn’t want. There was some talk about what a random distinction that is. We discuss that this is a kingdom, not a democracy, so even if they have pretty pink flowers…gone because the Queen has declared it so. We also talked about what kind of Queen would be out working with the peasants in the heat and itchy branches. We discussed different governments and how good leaders can function within them.

We were also making bundles to be taken away by the magic bundle removal people. We discussed who exactly comes to take the bundles, what kind of truck they have and how they want the material.

For whatever reason I was asked approximately 34 times whether what they were holding was half a bundle or a third or if they were done. They also wanted to know why some bundles only had 20 sticks and others had 30-40. The bundles needed to be less than 3ft in length and about 1 foot in diameter.

Wrapping and stacking the bundles was hilarious as the precarious attempts to go for height were eventually balanced by the desire to just get the job done.

There was some discussion on why some people like their bushes shaped like…shapes and why some people prefer bush looking bushes. This led to a discussion on why some people take care of their lawns and some don’t and all of the different ways to do so.

I love chore bargaining. No matter how thoughtfully I assign chores, they negotiate help or compromise or cooperate or trade or beg and switch things around. Some children just have natural talents in different areas and the children figure out how to encourage that. Tying the bundles was challenging for some of the younger children. I love watching them figure out how long the twine needed to be and become expert guestimators.

Some branches could be bent or broken into length, while some needed to be cut. Watching them figure out the diameter and strength of branch they could each bend or break was fabulous problem solving.

The behavioral issues. (MOOOOMMM! She’s sweeping for longer than I am, raking isn’t as fun as sweeping, how many bundles do I have to do? She did less than I did. Are we done yet? Why is she done? Why do I have to wear shoes? Can I go play with the kitty? Are we done?) Blessedly I am not in a school environment and I can just remind them that whiny workers clearly need more practice working so they learn to work without whining. And I can make that happen! I have all sorts of ideas.

I don’t normally analyze every day to day task in educationese. It just occurred to me that we talk a lot in education about hands-on, tactile learning, catering to different learning styles, involving the senses, active learning, using manipulatives and practical learning. Yet when you find out this activity is yard work…does it change the real education gained? It doesn’t look as educational as plastic manipulatives and desks and assigned groups.

Learning at Home
To read more of Britt’s articles, click the picture.

I have been chided before for having my children out doing such an educational activity on a school day, during school time. It is about a once a week occurrence, though not always on a school day. Is the education gained less valuable? Do any of us really think…gee I wish children knew less about hard work? Or wouldn’t a worksheet be better than practical application? What is the best balance between application and book learning? I don’t totally know the answer to those questions. I know I can write this out in educationese, but do I or others really value the learning involved in such a mundane activity?

I do value being able to see that the job is done instead of getting a random letter grade. There is a sense of understanding and unity when we can look together on something we have done well together. I know the satisfaction connected to effort is wonderful and enforces the learning in a very distinct way.

Britt Kelly

Britt grew up in a family of six brothers and one sister and gained a bonus sister later. She camped in the High Sierras, canoed down the Colorado, and played volleyball at Brigham Young University. She then served a mission to South Africa.

With all of her time in the gym and the mountains and South Africa, she was totally prepared to become the mother of 2 sons and soon to be 9 daughters. By totally prepared she means willing to love them and muddle through everything else in a partially sleepless state. She is mostly successful at figuring out how to keep the baby clothed, or at least diapered, though her current toddler is challenging this skill.

She feels children naturally love to learn and didn’t want to disrupt childhood curiosity with worksheets and school bells. She loves to play in the dirt, read books, go on adventures, watch her children discover new things, and mentor her children. Her oldest child is currently at a community college and her oldest son is going to high school at a public school. She loves to follow her children in their unique paths and interests.

She loves to write because, unlike the laundry and the dishes, writing stays done. Whenever someone asks her how she does it all she wonders what in the world they think she’s doing.