In recent years, it seems like Church leaders have discussed this topic a lot. How the priesthood applies to women has been spoken about in General Conference, Face to Face discussions, Church magazines, books, podcasts, and more. Maybe it’s seemed like a hot topic because my personal interest in how the priesthood applies to women has been piqued in recent years. Maybe our Church, like other societies, is realizing the suppressing effect patriarchy has had on women, and it’s doing its part to correct false ideas, teachings, and traditions. Maybe the Spirit has been guiding Church leaders to emphasize this topic more (that one’s a yes, not just a maybe!). Maybe it’s all the above and some more.

I am grateful the priesthood is now being taught in a way that includes women, beyond the old “Well, men can’t give themselves a priesthood blessing; therefore, the priesthood applies to women, too.” While that is true, it barely scratches the surface of the priesthood power and privilege of women. I think that is why the priesthood is being taught better—to empower women with truth so they can fulfill their potential. Women are teaching and being taught what our privilege and full divine potential is, and how to live up to it now.

The last few years, President Nelson has been pleading with the women of the Church to live up to their priesthood privilege:

“As a righteous, endowed Latter-day Saint woman, you speak and teach with power and authority from God. Whether by exhortation or conversation, we need your voice teaching the doctrine of Christ. We need your input in family, ward, and stake councils. Your participation is essential and never ornamental!”

This article is a piece of what I have learned from studying about the priesthood. I will not describe everything about the priesthood and women. I simply do not know it all, and it would be a book instead of an article. I will discuss a few truths I learned that have helped me understand my priesthood potential. I hope it will help other women too. 

As I’ve studied the scriptures, speeches from General Authorities and Officers, and the temple ceremonies and ordinances, I have noticed that the priesthood works differently in a family versus in the Church.

Familial and Hierarchical Priesthood Structures

A woman lives up to her priesthood privilege in the family, temple, and Church

We are most familiar discussing how priesthood power, authority, keys, and offices function in the Church. For example, a bishop is the presiding priesthood leader in a ward and holds some priesthood keys, and ward members work with priesthood authority in the ward by virtue of their calling or priesthood office. The Church is structured in a hierarchical way, with Jesus Christ as the head, then the First Presidency and Apostles, all the way down to you and me.

However, the priesthood is administered differently in the family and the temple. There is no single “head” of a family. A wife and husband are equal leaders in their family, and they have equal priesthood authority. In the temple, women and men officiate in priesthood ordinances. The familial (also called the “patriarchal”) order of the priesthood functions in the family and the temple.

President Dallin H. Oaks taught: 

“A most important difference in the functioning of priesthood authority in the family and in the Church results from the fact that the government of the family is patriarchal, whereas the government of the Church is hierarchical.”

Before Christ’s mortal ministry when He established His Church, the priesthood was administered primarily through the familial structure.

Why does this information matter? It means that we cannot always look to the structure of the Church to know how the priesthood functions in a family and the temple. It means that a wife is equal with her husband in their marriage and family decisions—not “the man is the head and the woman is the neck.”

My parents are divorced, and yet I have never felt a lack of priesthood power and authority in my mom’s home. I never understood why this was until I learned about the familial structure of the priesthood. Even though my mom is not ordained to a priesthood office, she has priesthood power and authority because she is a mother who keeps her covenants.

President Nelson taught:

“When you are set apart to serve in a calling under the direction of one who holds priesthood keys—such as your bishop or stake president—you are given priesthood authority to function in that calling.”

President Nelson is describing how the hierarchical priesthood structure applies to women. He goes on to describe how the familial priesthood structure empowers women:

“Similarly, in the holy temple you are authorized to perform and officiate in priesthood ordinances every time you attend. Your temple endowment prepares you to do so.”

Priesthood Power, Keys, Office, and Authority

A woman lives up to her priesthood privilege by acting with priesthood power and authority

In their book, The Melchizedek Priesthood: Understanding the Doctrine, Living the Principles, Elder and Sister Renlund compared the word priesthood to how we use the word “earth.” Earth can refer to the planet or a pile of dirt. Similarly, the priesthood includes the power of God, and the specific functions of priesthood power, authority, keys, and offices.

For example, a man can be ordained to the priesthood office of elder and be given authority to perform some priesthood ordinances. However, when this man is in the temple, he does not automatically have priesthood authority to officiate in the initiatory ordinance.

Similarly, an endowed woman who is a temple worker has authority to officiate in some temple ordinances. She is not ordained to a priesthood office the same way a man is (deacon, teacher, priest, and so on). Her authority to officiate in those ordinances is only in the temple. This is also because of the familial and hierarchical ways the priesthood is administered. 

Anyone can feel the power of God (the priesthood) working in his or her life. In her book The Priesthood Power of Women, Sister Barbara Morgan Gardner says that Joseph Smith translated the Book of Mormon through the power of God (the priesthood) even before he was ordained to a priesthood office. Covenant-keeping members have been blessed with priesthood power as they remain worthy. (Handbook 3.5)

When I was in college, I lived with faithful female friends. I never felt a lack of priesthood power in our apartment. I did not fully understand why until I understood the distinctions between priesthood power, authority, and office. We each had priesthood power because we kept our covenants.

Those with priesthood keys of presidency unlock the authority of the priesthood for those they are stewards over. Relatively few people hold priesthood keys of presidency. (Handbook 3.4.1.1)

People have priesthood authority in the hierarchical structure because of their priesthood office, or a church calling they have been set-apart in. “Priesthood authority is the authorization to represent God and act in His name. In the Church, all priesthood authority is exercised under the direction of those who hold priesthood keys,” according to the Church’s Handbook 3.4.

A woman can feel priesthood power, and this is enhanced as she makes and keeps covenants. A woman who has been set apart in her calling has priesthood authority. She also has priesthood authority in her home, including within her marriage and family. She has priesthood authority by virtue of her worship in the temple. 

While serving in various Church callings, especially as a missionary and as a teacher, I have felt priesthood authority in fulfilling those callings. 

Presiding in the Family

A woman lives up to her priesthood privilege in the family by being an equal partner with her husband — a single woman always presides in her home

“The Family: A Proclamation to the World” states, “Fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness.” Unfortunately, some have misinterpreted “preside” in an unequal way.

Knowing the priesthood works differently in the family and in the Church is crucial to understanding more about fathers presiding in a family. In the hierarchical structure of the priesthood within the Church, the person who presides is the ultimate authority in that setting. However, this is not how a husband or father presides in the family.

When I was younger, my family was on vacation with my grandparents. My grandma got everyone’s attention because she wanted to have a family spiritual devotional. As she began to lead the discussion, she stopped and apologized to my grandpa, her husband, and said that he should lead the discussion because he presides.

I remember feeling bothered by my grandparents’ exchange, because I felt it was completely appropriate for my grandma to lead a spiritual discussion.

Referring back to Sister Gardner’s book (it is an incredible book you all should read!), she says that she points out to her students what the Brethren do not teach about presiding:

“President Nelson, for example, does not mention making the final decision, bossing, or even being in charge, but rather talks of love, service, help, and ensuring sacred family time. It is clear that presiding requires being like and treating others as Christ would” (104).

The Church Handbook supports that presiding is Christlike:

“Presiding in the family is the responsibility to help lead family members back to dwell in God’s presence. This is done by serving and teaching with gentleness, meekness, and pure love, following the example of Jesus Christ” (Handbook 2.1.3).

President M. Russell Ballard said about fathers presiding in their family:

“Fathers perform priesthood ordinances and give priesthood blessings, including father’s blessings to their children.”

Women, including wives and mothers, preside in their home too. It is inappropriate for a priesthood-ordained son to choose someone to pray instead of his mother. It is demeaning for priesthood-holding brethren to direct a meeting within the home of the single sister they are visiting (such as a ministering).

Women are crucial in teaching the gospel to their family. (I will discuss this more in a future post.)

Sister Julie B. Beck, former Relief Society General President, said:

“The priesthood role of fathers is to preside and pass priesthood ordinances to the next generation. The priesthood role of mothers is to influence. These are essential, complementary, and interdependent responsibilities” (Gardner, 108).

I am grateful for the women and men in my life who have been excellent examples of working together in unity to help God’s children on the gospel path. I have seen family members, friends, and church leaders do this well. I am confident the youth today have a better understanding of the priesthood than I did as a kid. Overall, I believe and hope most men in the Church are presiding righteously. However, learning more about what presiding in the family means was important to me as I studied more about the priesthood. 

When I learned more about the familial structure of the priesthood in the family and the temple, it showed me that God really has empowered men and women to work together as equals. I am blessed to be married to the most Christlike person I have ever met, and he and I have always felt equal and complementary. I am grateful to now have the information and language to be able to teach our child and others about what presiding and priesthood authority means in the family.

Increasing Priesthood Power

I am truly grateful for the renewed emphasis on teaching truth about women and the priesthood. I have learned so much, and there is still so much to learn! Learning correct doctrine is crucial because, as President Nelson said, “[G]ood inspiration is based upon good information.” How can God teach you how to live up to your divine potential if you don’t know what it is?

To read more of Kristine’s articles, click here.

While studying the priesthood, I have felt frustrated because a lot of what I learned was personal revelation. (Over time, the truths I received personally were confirmed by Church leaders, which has been exciting.) Receiving personal revelation is a lot of work. While rewarding and invigorating, it would be nice to have everything about the priesthood spelled out easily. Llearning how to increase the power of the priesthood in your life is done primarily through personal revelation.

When inviting women to draw the Savior’s priesthood power more fully into their lives, President Nelson said, “The Holy Ghost will be your personal tutor as you seek to understand what the Lord would have you know and do.”

He also taught that service, sincere prayers, fasting, scripture study, temple worship, family history work, and increased personal purity will increase priesthood power.

“Sisters, you have the right to draw liberally upon the Savior’s power to help your family and others you love.”

How encouraging is that? Our prophet is reminding us women that we can pull down the powers of heaven. It is our right and privilege. What a blessing and comfort! The trials you and I have faced on a personal and societal level have been difficult. I’m sure that you, like me, have seen others you love suffer. I’m sure you want to protect those you love from pain and sorrow as much as you can. Our society and personal trials are not over. It is empowering to know that we as women can work with the men in our lives to invoke priesthood power into our lives. Imagine the spiritual protection and resilience of a family whose mother and father know their priesthood privilege and use it to bless and protect their marriage and children! God wants to bless us, and He wants us all to have His help. Living up to priesthood privilege is all about inviting God’s infinite power into our lives.

Kristine Hoyt

Just as I knew that my dog was dirty, Heavenly Father knows I have some cleaning up to do in my life. I can’t hide my sins any better than Casper can hide his dirty feet. I can tuck them away temporarily, but eventually I will have to deal with them. It would be a lot easier to deal with them now rather than to try to explain them when I leave this earthly existence. Am I ready to be clean?

What is it that makes a person ready to be clean? As I pondered that, I realized the answer is childlike humility—something I am lacking. The process towards becoming clean, for me, begins with humility. I decided to read about humility and how to obtain it. I was surprised to find that I have previously bookmarked nine General Conference talks about humility. Obviously, today was not the first time I realized that I lack humility! The question begs to be answered why I have not conquered the problem.

[T]he greatest act of courage and love in the history of mankind—Christ’s atoning sacrifice—was also the greatest act of humility and submissiveness. Some may wonder if those seeking to become humble must forever defer to the strongly held opinions and positions of others. Certainly the Savior’s life evidences that true humility is anything but subservience, weakness, or servility (Marlin K. Jensen, “To Walk Humbly with Thy God,” Apr. 2001 General Conference).

The quote from Elder Jensen above may very well hold the key to my humility. I am a very independent person, and in some subconscious way I think being humble makes me feel like I’m weak. Yet, the single most humble person ever to walk the earth was anything but weak. Christ is my example. Looking to Jesus Christ for answers is always the best way to learn.

As a woman, I’ve had to harden the exterior in order to survive in a world where men dominate. The drawback is the lack of humility. Being a strong, independent woman is fine as long as I remember the source of that strength. Without my Heavenly Father, I am nothing. Without the Savior, I am nothing. Without the quiet guidance of the Holy Ghost, I am nothing. Yet so often I am puffed up in pride and forget to be humble and grateful for the strength that makes me whole. Without humility, I cannot become clean. I’m not clean and whole because I hide my uncleanliness in pride. The day I am finally able to strip off the pride and become humble, I will be able to clean the hidden places of my life.

What will make me ready to do this? I hope I don’t wait for some great tragedy. I hope after rereading those nine General Conference talks about humility that I’ll develop a plan to develop humility—a plan that I can stick to like glue.

To read more of Tudie’s articles, click here.

Humbly submitting our will to the Father brings us the empowerment of God—the power of humility. It is the power to meet life’s adversities, the power of peace, the power of hope, the power of a heart throbbing with a love for and testimony of the Savior Jesus Christ, even the power of redemption. To this end, the Savior is our supreme example of the power of humility and submissiveness. After all, His submitting His will to the Father brought about the greatest, and even the most powerful, event in all of history. Perhaps some of the most sacred words in all the scriptures are simply, “Not my will, but thine, be done” (Luke 22:42) (Richard C. Edgley, “The Empowerment of Humility,” Oct. 2003 General Conference).

It occurs to me that maybe I’ve been trying to empower myself in the wrong ways as a woman. The empowerment of God, humility, will make me clean. The question, “Am I ready to be clean?” may be replaced by “Am I ready to be humble?”

Tudie Rose

Tudie Rose is a mother of four and grandmother of ten in Sacramento, California. You can find her on Twitter as @TudieRose. She blogs as Tudie Rose at http://potrackrose.wordpress.com. She has written articles for Familius. You will find a Tudie Rose essay in Lessons from My Parents, Michele Robbins, Familius 2013, at http://www.familius.com/lessons-from-my-parents.

These updates have strengthened my testimony of our Heavenly Parents’ love, and of modern-day prophets. I think each of us has a gospel- or Church-related question that we figuratively “put back on the shelf.” We have done all the study, pondering, and praying we can and still have not gotten a full answer or understanding. One of mine is why women seem to have a primarily “support the man” role in society, including Church culture and in some scriptures. For about the last five years, I have prayed about and studied women in the kingdom, and I have been comforted and led to many resources that have helped answer my question.

The recent changes and clarifications regarding women in the Church have confirmed to me what the Spirit has whispered to me the last five years: Heavenly Father loves His daughters and sons equally, and the Church is not immune from the cultural traditions of humanity. In time, things will feel more equal.

If your question on the shelf is bothering you, I implore you to please hold on! If things don’t seem fair, equal, respectful, or make sense now, just hang on — culture and incorrect tradition will be corrected and changed.

Women Participating More Visibly

President Nelson’s time as prophet will definitely be remembered for the many changes he authorized. It seems he (and those he counseled with) have examined traditions and culture and sifted out those which are outdated, exclusive, and whose purposes have faded with time.

Many of these changes better emphasized the equality of women in the kingdom by lifting their voices and giving them more visible opportunities to serve and become involved. A few notable changes include:

• Women and girls can serve as witnesses for live and proxy baptisms and sealings.
•  Temple ceremony wording and presentation changed to eliminate references to a subservient role for women.
• The Young Women theme is new and starts with “I am a beloved daughter of Heavenly Parents,” which reminds young women of their Heavenly Mother.

These changes meant a lot to me because they plainly showed that women were excluded in ordinances and in the temple based on culture, not doctrine. It shows that women and girls are valued in the work of salvation. I also love the inclusion of Heavenly Mother in the Young Women’s theme because teaching more openly about Heavenly Mother shows girls their true divine nature and destiny.

In 2015, before President Nelson became the prophet, the Relief Society General President began serving on the Priesthood and Family Executive Council, the Young Women General President began serving on the Missionary Executive Council, and the Primary General President began serving on the Temple and Family History Executive Council. This is significant because all these Presidents are women, and their input and knowledge is being considered on these councils which make Church policy.

President Bonnie L. Oscarson, the Young Women General President at the time, posted on Facebook about her new assignment:

“What a great time to be a woman in the Church where our voices are needed and valued more than ever. I am grateful for the opportunity to add my perspective and experiences to this council as we work together to spread the message of the restored Gospel.”

I am grateful women are being invited to participate more fully and more visibly in the Church than ever before. I’m grateful for Church councils I have participated in. I learned that even though it seems like the bishop makes key decisions, it really is a counseled effort most times. One of my bishops used many of my ideas for Sacrament meeting speakers and topics. As a missionary, I was a Sister Training Leader which allowed me to serve the sisters better and voice their concerns at Mission Leadership Councils and to my mission president and his wife (who was also very involved in her missionaries’ well-being). I have great hope for our times and the future generations.

Doctrine, Principles, Application, and Culture

For the first two years of our marriage, my husband and I taught the teenagers’ Sunday School class in our congregation. We enjoyed discussing the gospel with these teens. One Sunday, we based our lesson off of Elder Bednar’s teachings about the difference between doctrine, culture, application, and culture. (We added culture.) My husband and I made categories on the chalkboard and listed things for our class to categorize.

Elder David A. Bednar teaches in his book Increase in Learning that doctrine is “a truth of salvation revealed by a loving Heavenly Father,” and that “they are relatively few in number.” Doctrine answers the question why? Examples of doctrine include the nature of the Godhead, the plan of happiness, and Jesus Christ’s Atonement.

A principle is “a doctrinally based guideline for the righteous exercise of moral agency.” Principles provide direction and answer what? Examples include love, unity, and prayer as principles to the doctrine that God is our loving Heavenly Father.

Applications are the “actual behaviors, action steps, practices or procedures by which gospel doctrines and principles are enacted in our lives,” (156). Applications answer how? Studying the scriptures and attending church are applications to the principle of faith in Jesus Christ, which we do because of the doctrine that we are saved through Jesus Christ.

Our teenage class categorized things pretty well. However, the “culture” category stumped our class a few times. For example, they categorized “having lots of kids” as a principle.

This activity with our teenagers reminded me how important it is to understand the difference between doctrine, principles, applications, and even culture. My own personal faith struggles aren’t because of doctrine, but because of culture. I would also venture to say that much of the Church’s critics take issue with things categorized as application or culture, but rarely doctrine.

Culture, or “the incorrect traditions of our fathers” as the Book of Mormon puts it, is not unique to Latter-day Saints. Critics of the Church have long pointed out the backseat that women seem to take. However, that is evidenced in society, not just the Church. The culture of society is embedded deep within each of us, and it can be hard and uncomfortable to change.

In her book The Priesthood Power of Women, Barbara Morgan Gardner said she was told she could not serve in certain Church capacities because she is a woman. She was told she could not become a full-time seminary teacher or institute coordinator because “they don’t hire women” and “you need the priesthood to be a coordinator, especially in the East.” Sister Gardner became both a full-time seminary teacher and the institute director and seminary coordinator in the Boston, Massachusetts area. She also served as the Latter-day Saint chaplain at Harvard and MIT. She says of that appointment:

“I was not shocked that both Church members and those not of our faith tradition were surprised to have a woman serving as a chaplain. Frankly, I was too! There was no change in policy; it just simply hadn’t ever happened before” (134).

Sister Gardner’s last line is cause for reflection — what else do we do just because it has always been done that way? President Nelson and other Church leaders seem to have been asking that question a lot in recent years. I am grateful they have.

Doctrine Will Overcome Incorrect Cultural Practices

If you feel marginalized, ask yourself “is this just culture, or is it doctrine?” My guess is it will likely be culture.

In the Book of Mormon, the prophet Nephi teaches God loves all His children equally:

“He inviteth them all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him, black and white, bond and free, male and female; and he remembereth the heathen; and all are alike unto God, both Jew and Gentile.”

Our Savior Jesus Christ suffered for each one of us. Not just men, not perfect members, not just the person who looks like they have it all together — everyone! Each person is dear to our Savior, and He shed drops of blood for each of us. Jesus Christ’s infinite and eternally-inclusive atoning sacrifice shows how much He and our Heavenly Parents care about all of Their children.

The blessings promised to covenant-keeping Saints are so good and so real. Please hold on to your faith and your covenants. You know that God loves you and all His children equally. God will not let you down.

“Except in the case of His only perfect Begotten Son, imperfect people are all God has ever had to work with,” Elder Holland said in general conference. “That must be terribly frustrating to Him, but He deals with it. So should we. And when you see imperfection, remember that the limitation is not in the divinity of the work.”

It is an exciting time to be a woman in Christ’s Church. We are all needed in God’s kingdom as we are. Our unique experiences, perspectives, backgrounds, voices, and ideas are vital to helping our sisters and brothers receive all the blessings God has for us.

Kristine Hoyt

I have been pondering the idea of “reading” the Book of Mormon vs. actually “studying” the Book of Mormon.  I even looked up the difference between the two terms. Turns out, reading involves “going through a particular topic to gather information from it.” Studying is “a process where complete devotion of time and energy is dedicated to understand a concept within a topic/subject.

Another component I’ve learned about is the importance of having a goal in mind when you are studying rather than just passively perusing the content. So how would I have a “goal” in mind when I study the Book of Mormon? Let me explain how I learned about that this past week.

Just as many of you may be experiencing, our Sunday worship during the shutdown due to the pandemic includes an online Zoom meeting for our little branch. We spend an hour going through the current Come, Follow Me lesson and sharing various insights of what we read/studied. Typically, the teacher or facilitator of that meeting rotates between the members.

Last week I was invited to be the teacher/facilitator. We were in the lesson covering Alma 53-63 which is referred to as part of the “war chapters.” I have noticed that when I’m asked to lead a discussion, I have motivation to study the lesson rather than simply reading it. The first thing that came to my mind when I saw that it was the war chapters was the memory of a talk given years ago by John Bytheway at Education Week called Righteous Warriors: Lessons from the War Chapters. (He has since published a book with the same title.)

I listened to his talk with great interest as he focused on that subject. I found myself pausing the video and jotting down notes. At the end of the talk, he challenged everyone to begin our own study where he left off, specifically Alma 53-62, which was the lesson for this past Sunday.  He challenged us to find other lessons that he didn’t have time to cover in his talk.  That challenge gave me a “goal” to focus on as I studied… “What lesson am I seeing in this portion of the scriptures?” By the time I got through with my studying, I had highlighted portions that spoke to me about various lessons. Then when I finished the reading, I went back and started writing the lesson I saw there and whether it was spiritual or temporal. Seven typewritten pages later, I was amazed at what I had gleaned because I had a specific goal.

We’ve been taught that the Book of Mormon was not written for the Nephites and Lamanites. In fact, it didn’t become available for hundreds of years after the writing occurred.

When my husband and I first moved into our branch over 16 years ago, I was asked to be the Gospel Doctrine teacher, and that calling lasted for 11 years.  (The Lord knew I would need time to focus on studying instead of just reading.)  During that time, something that I had never before put together came into my mind like a lightbulb going off. For many years, Sunday School has had a four-year rotation between studying the Old Testament one year, the New Testament the next, the Book of Mormon the next, and the Doctrine and Covenants and Pearl of Great Price for the fourth year. So what struck me was that every year we are studying the Book of Mormon is the year that in the United States we elect a president.  Every fourth year! I don’t believe that is a coincidence!  My curiosity invited me to take a look at where we are in the lesson plan during the months leading up to the actual election. We are in the “war chapters.” The week of the actual election, we cover the nine chapters in Mormon which is all about the final destruction of the Nephite nation.

We know that Mormon abridged the Book of Mormon from records that had been kept by the Nephites for hundreds of years. We understand that the Lord directed Mormon to put specific things in that abridgment for a specific purpose.

Could it be that these war chapters are our primer for the season we are currently experiencing? (A primer refers to any book that presents the most basic elements of any subject.) They are a key to what we must know and what we must know how to do in order to successfully navigate in the season leading up to the Second Coming of the Savior. More importantly, it is the primer for who we must become in order to be useful instruments in the hands of the Lord in this season. It’s not enough to read these things. We are to allow the Spirit to infuse them into our very being and allow them to inform our every step on the journey ahead of us.

There are spiritual lessons and temporal lessons in these chapters that we are to use to measure our spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical preparation for the events leading up to the return of the Savior to the earth.

In the past few years, the Church has launched the self-reliance initiative where we have the opportunity to go through a 12-week course of study (not reading!) about how we can improve our lives and become self-sufficient in these four areas:

• Personal Finances
• Starting and Growing My business
• Education for Better Work
• Finding a Better Job

Most recently, another area of study is focusing on “Emotional Resilience.” Can you imagine the importance of us strengthening our capacity for emotional resilience in our lives to be able to withstand the confusion that is swirling around us?

Eight months ago, none of us could have predicted the changes that would be happening in our world, our country, our state, our communities, our homes. Added to that, we are having earthquakes in divers places, firestorms, hurricanes, tornados, etc. Many people are in an emotional overload or shutdown because their emotional resources have been depleted.

The Lord needs us to be spot on: ready to minister and serve in our communities, to “lift where we stand” to carry the burdens of those around us as we reach out in humanitarian efforts.

Pondering all these various components of our current reality, I was highly motivated to comb through Alma 53-63 and pray for the Spirit to be with me as I sought to identify the spiritual and temporal lessons available there that would give me a guideline for assessing my readiness to lift where I stand. The words were all familiar to me, yet I had never put them together using the lens of “What was the lifesaving message the Lord instructed Mormon to leave with us?”

Seven typewritten pages later, I am certain that I didn’t find all the lessons. When it is time and we are ready, the Spirit will open the eyes of our understanding as we strive to be prepared to serve in the winding-up scenes of this dispensation. There are spiritual and temporal lessons in last week’s lesson that we are able to use to measure our spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical preparation for the events leading up to the return of the Savior to the earth.

President Nelson has made amazing statements that are important to study. I’m going back this week and studying his conference talk from October 2015, “A Plea to My Sisters.”

Three quotes that come to my mind that he has said recently:

To the sisters of the Church: “We need your strength, your conversion, your conviction, your ability to lead, your wisdom, and your voices.”

To the Church’s general membership: “In coming days it will not be possible to survive spiritually without the … constant influence of the Holy Ghost.”

To the general membership: “Let me be very clear about this. If the world loses the moral rectitude of its women, the world will never recover.”

To read more of Sonja’s articles, click here.

I am discovering that I have spent most of my life scratching at the surface of the value of the Book of Mormon.  This past week has taught me that I need to dig deep, with a goal in mind, to unearth the treasure trove of wisdom and instruction that is to be found there. Now I pray for Spirit to bring to my mind a question that I want to find the answer(s) to as I study so that I might be more intentional and focused in my efforts.

I challenge you listen to John Bytheway’s talk and then go through Alma 53-63 and discover your insights of the lessons that are held there. I will include the ones I found here (click the link to download the PDF): Spiritual and Temporal Lessons from the War Chapters. I am certain there are more that I haven’t yet comprehended!

Sonja Hopkins

Sonja lives with her husband, Dale, on Anderson Island, Washington. She and her husband are Church Service Missionaries serving in the Addiction Recovery Program, focusing on pornography and sex addiction. She is also a certified life coach and teaches “Life Skills for Emotional Self-Mastery” in her stake twice a month. She does not teach you only to process something traumatic done to you in the past; rather, she helps you learn to feel it, heal it, and LET GO of whatever you still do to yourself and to others in order to cope with what was done to you in the past.

As you read the story, what is your takeaway? Does this story apply to you in any way?

It’s the story about how Abigail mediated between two opposing worldviews. Abigail married Nabal “and she was a woman of good understanding, and of a beautiful countenance: but the man was churlish and evil in his doings….”

Nabal was rich. He had 3,000 sheep and 1,000 goats. This event took place during the shearing season on Mount Carmel.

David and his men had protected some of Nabal’s shepherds. And since David’s group’s provisions were running short, he thought he’d send some messengers to Nabal requesting hospitality from Nabal for David and his men.

And David sent out ten young men, and David said unto the young men, Get you up to Carmel, and go to Nabal, and greet him in my name:

 

And thus shall ye say to him that liveth in prosperity, Peace be both to thee, and peace be to thine house, and peace be unto all that thou hast.

 

And now I have heard that thou hast shearers: now thy shepherds which were with us, we hurt them not, neither was there ought missing unto them, all the while they were in Carmel.

 

Ask thy young men, and they will shew thee. Wherefore let the young men find favour in thine eyes: for we come in a good day: give, I pray thee, whatsoever cometh to thine hand unto thy servants, and to thy son David.

 

And when David’s young men came, they spake to Nabal according to all those words in the name of David, and ceased.

 

And Nabal answered David’s servants, and said, Who is David? and who is the son of Jesse? there be many servants now a days that break away every man from his master.

 

Shall I then take my bread, and my water, and my flesh that I have killed for my shearers, and give it unto men, whom I know not whence they be?

 

So David’s young men turned their way, and went again, and came and told him all those sayings.

 

And David said unto his men, Gird ye on every man his sword. And they girded on every man his sword; and David also girded on his sword: and there went up after David about four hundred men; and two hundred abode by the stuff.

One of the young men who experienced David’s protection told Abigail what transpired and how Nabal railed on the visitors sent to salute him. Abigail knew what that meant. She sprung into action.

Then Abigail made haste, and took two hundred loaves, and two bottles of wine, and five sheep ready dressed, and five measures of parched corn, and an hundred clusters of raisins, and two hundred cakes of figs, and laid them on asses.

 

And she said unto her servants, Go on before me; behold, I come after you. But she told not her husband Nabal.

 

And it was so, as she rode on the ass, that she came down by the covert of the hill, and, behold, David and his men came down against her; and she met them.

That list of food made ready astonishes me, but there were a lot of men. When she gets home, Nabal is still feasting like a king and apparently didn’t miss all of the food that Abigail gave to David.

The next verses recorded David’s vengeance again Nabal. He vowed that no one associated with Nabal would be spared.

Abigail Seeks to Make Restitution for Injustice

David accepts Abigail’s plea.

And when Abigail saw David, she hasted, and lighted off the ass, and fell before David on her face, and bowed herself to the ground,

 

And fell at his feet, and said, Upon me, my lord, upon me let this iniquity be: and let thine handmaid, I pray thee, speak in thine audience, and hear the words of thine handmaid.

Abigail acknowledged David’s plans for just retribution and took responsibility for an injustice she did not inflict, but that was inflicted nonetheless.

Let not my lord, I pray thee, regard this man of Belial, even Nabal: for as his name is, so is he; Nabal is his name, and folly is with him: but I thine handmaid saw not the young men of my lord, whom thou didst send.

 

Now therefore, my lord, as the Lord liveth, and as thy soul liveth, seeing the Lord hath withholden thee from coming to shed blood, and from avenging thyself with thine own hand, now let thine enemies, and they that seek evil to my lord, be as Nabal.

 

And now this blessing which thine handmaid hath brought unto my lord, let it even be given unto the young men that follow my lord.

 

I pray thee, forgive the trespass of thine handmaid: for the Lord will certainly make my lord a sure house; because my lord fighteth the battles of the Lord, and evil hath not been found in thee all thy days.

 

Yet a man is risen to pursue thee, and to seek thy soul: but the soul of my lord shall be bound in the bundle of life with the Lord thy God; and the souls of thine enemies, them shall he sling out, as out of the middle of a sling.

 

And it shall come to pass, when the Lord shall have done to my lord according to all the good that he hath spoken concerning thee, and shall have appointed thee ruler over Israel;

 

That this shall be no grief unto thee, nor offence of heart unto my lord, either that thou hast shed blood causeless, or that my lord hath avenged himself: but when the Lord shall have dealt well with my lord, then remember thine handmaid.

Abigail, from her position of prosperity, saw David’s perspective and expectation for fair reward. She acknowledged the Lord’s long-term purposes for David and his men and also the Lord’s divine protection and promises.

David Praised God for Abigail’s Mediation

To read more of Delisa’s articles, click here.

And David said to Abigail, Blessed be the Lord God of Israel, which sent thee this day to meet me:

And blessed be thy advice, and blessed be thou, which hast kept me this day from coming to shed blood, and from avenging myself with mine own hand.

 

For in very deed, as the Lord God of Israel liveth, which hath kept me back from hurting thee, except thou hadst hasted and come to meet me, surely there had not been left unto Nabal by the morning light any that pisseth against the wall.

 

So David received of her hand that which she had brought him, and said unto her, Go up in peace to thine house; see, I have hearkened to thy voice, and have accepted thy person.

This story is so visual to me. I see Abigail with her household rushing to prepare an offering to save their lives. I see her embarking on the trek to David’s group. When she sees David, she immediately acknowledges what was wrong and takes responsibility for it. She became a mediator for Nabal. She provided the sustenance that David needed. David accepted her mediation and left in peace.

I’ve turned to this story countless times over the years when searching for wisdom.  I hope as you read it with me today that the Holy Ghost gave you wisdom that will bless your life.

Delisa Hargrove

I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I have moved 64 times and have not tired of experiencing this beautiful earth! I love the people, languages, histories/anthropologies, & especially religious cultures of the world. My life long passion is the study & searching out of religious symbolism, specifically related to ancient & modern temples. My husband Anthony and I love our bulldog Stig, adventures, traveling, movies, motorcycling, and time with friends and family.

Then a scripture changed all of my imaginings.

But behold, verily, verily, I say unto you that mine eyes are upon you. I am in your midst and ye cannot see me;

I Am in Your Midst and Ye Cannot See Me

I imagine Him beside us, aware of every detail.

He cheers at the successes a newly homeschooling woman feels. He also sees and understands her overwhelm as tasks build on her shoulders.

He hears a woman praying for court cases, put on hold, to finalize the adoption of a foster child. He knows the strain and emotional drain of the journey she’s traveled.

He whispers ideas into the ear of the newlywed navigating compromise and understanding. He’s aware of her eager anticipation and fears as she faces her new life.

He stands by the woman who, while supporting her husband through medical school, now gets to sell their home and move across the country. He’s been there through all the moves and all of the single-handed parenting as they’ve determined to achieve this goal as a family.

He rejoices at victories with the woman who’s potty training a precocious toddler. And gives extra super-strength during the moments of frustration.

He embraces the woman with an active mind trapped in a non-functioning body and he strengthens her angel mother who surrenders comparative “normalcy” to be her daughter’s advocate.

He knows the hopes, dreams and concerns of the woman who has sent her child out into the world during a pandemic. He promises He will fulfill the promises He covenanted with her.

He kneels with the empty-nester woman as she pours out her soul for her children and grandchildren. He shines extra light as she endures extra loneliness.

He sits with the exhausted woman whose baby wakes up multiple times during the night, every night.

He opens the curtains of the woman living in the darkness of sin.

He holds the woman sobbing over unmet expectations and broken promises.

He cherishes the woman struggling with addiction.

He stays with the woman alone at the end of every day.

Despite Difficulty and Weakness, There Is a Plan

His eyes are upon us—all of us.  And in the midst of mortality’s difficulties and our weaknesses,  He has a plan for us! For our eternal reward.

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.

Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you.

And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.

And I will be found of you, saith the Lord…

He says He is there…as near to us as He possibly can be.  He is in our midst, but we cannot see Him.  Can we ever see Him?

Verily, thus saith the Lord: It shall come to pass that every soul who forsaketh his sins and cometh unto me, and calleth on my name, and obeyeth my voice, and keepeth my commandments, shall see my face and know that I am;

I Nothing Lack If I Am His

To read more of Delisa’s articles, click here.

Women of God, we are His and He is ours forever.

The King of love my shepherd is,
whose goodness faileth never.
I nothing lack if I am his,
and he is mine forever.

 

Where streams of living water flow,
my ransomed soul he leadeth;
and where the verdant pastures grow,
with food celestial feedeth.

 

Perverse and foolish, oft I strayed,
but yet in love he sought me;
and on his shoulder gently laid,
and home, rejoicing, brought me.

 

In death’s dark vale I fear no ill,
with thee, dear Lord, beside me;
thy rod and staff my comfort still,
thy cross before to guide me.

 

Thou spreadst a table in my sight;
thy unction grace bestoweth;
and oh, what transport of delight
from thy pure chalice floweth!

 

And so through all the length of days,
thy goodness faileth never;
Good Shepherd, may I sing thy praise
within thy house forever.

Even if we can’t see Him yet, may we always know He is with us, always.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Delisa Hargrove

I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I have moved 64 times and have not tired of experiencing this beautiful earth! I love the people, languages, histories/anthropologies, & especially religious cultures of the world. My life long passion is the study & searching out of religious symbolism, specifically related to ancient & modern temples. My husband Anthony and I love our bulldog Stig, adventures, traveling, movies, motorcycling, and time with friends and family.

After a lot of thought and consideration for the young women in my ward, I decided that the spiritual experience needed to be a surprise element at camp that the YCL’s didn’t plan. I felt that even they needed spiritual experiences to help their faith in our Savior grow. I decided to provide this experience by planning and carrying out a “Faith Walk.” One YCL had mentioned that she had never done a faith walk in the dark before and that she had always wanted to. I had no idea how to plan a faith walk or even where to begin! But one thing I knew for certain was that a faith walk in the dark was important to this young woman and that it was her last year at camp, so I needed to make it happen.

Over the next several weeks, I spent many sleepless nights trying to figure out what to do and how to make this faith walk spiritual. After a lot of pondering and even more praying, I decided that the faith walk needed to be based on our Savior, Jesus Christ. I also knew that I had to make this faith walk safe, especially considering there had been bear sightings in the area the week before. I couldn’t just turn the girls loose on the mountain in the dark! But at the same time, I didn’t want the distraction of flashlights. As I thought about how to make this a meaningful spiritual experience, I felt like I was left completely in the dark. But as I pondered and thought about each girl, thoughts slowly began to form. And little by little, the ideas built on each other and became a guide to creating the faith walk.

I decided to have the girls make a lantern out of a jar shortly after they arrived at camp. Once their lantern was complete, I gave each young woman a battery-operated tea light candle to light their lanterns. What they chose to do with their lantern or their light was up to them. After a couple more activities (and while the young women ate dinner), I set up for our faith walk in the dark. 

I had twelve tall posts that I placed in the ground. Some posts were farther apart than others and not all were placed evenly apart or in a straight line. Each post had a different photo depicting the events leading up to the crucifixion of our Savior, Jesus Christ. With each photo was a quote or a small description of what happened in the picture, along with an analogy of how it applies to our lives today. On each post, below each photo and the description, was a lantern with a tea light candle. The lanterns matched the lanterns that the young women had made earlier in the day. The only difference was that the tea lights that were placed in these lanterns burned slightly brighter than the tea lights that I gave to the young women. But there was a purpose for this. Each lantern lit the posts and the photos of Christ, representing how He stands as our beacon in the dark.

After dinner each young woman grabbed her lantern and turned on her candle. Some candles let off a bright light because the young women carefully tucked their lanterns away in their tents, while other girls had used their lanterns and the candles burned a little dimmer. Each young woman lined up in a single file line anticipating her turn to walk on the path in the dark. One by one the girls began their faith walk, their lanterns lighting their way and each post standing like a beacon in the dark guiding the young women to where they needed to go. When one girl began walking to the second post, another girl began the faith walk, walking the trail alone to the first post where the beacon of light awaited her. The following posts weren’t as easy to see as the first and second posts as the path wasn’t straight and sometimes the posts were further apart making them difficult to see, thus representing the path that we take in this life.

As each of the girls walked the path on the faith walk, a funny thing happened. The young women whose lights were dim because they made foolish choices regarding their light, were unable to see the path. Not because they didn’t have light, but because they were too focused on how little of light that their lantern let off. So when they needed their lanterns they noticed how dim their lanterns were and looked to their feet instead of looking up to the beacon that was guiding their path the entire time. But the young women who made wise choices regarding their lanterns didn’t notice where they stepped. They knew that there was a brighter light guiding them. They knew their lanterns were there when and if they needed it, but these girls looked up to the light on the posts as their guide or their beacon in the night. And while their lanterns were important to staying on the path, their lanterns became insignificant as it was a greater light that they sought after.

Oftentimes we feel alone on our path in life and we’re not sure where to go or where to turn as we face difficulties and challenges. We might feel like our light is dimmed because of our choices, and we might not always see our path clearly as it appears distorted in the dark. We might look down at our feet trying too hard to focus on the steps that we take rather than looking up toward the light, realizing that our path is brighter because there is a beacon in the dark guiding us to where we need to go. Psalm 119:105 reads: 

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.

What would happen if we stopped focusing on our lack of light and where we stand? What if, instead we sought out a different light? A light that always burns bright and stands as a safe harbor like that of a lighthouse?

Our Father in Heaven gave us a Savior who died for us so that we could be forgiven of our sins, and Who by the grace of God will save us so that we can return to live with our Father in Heaven and receive immortality and eternal life someday. But our Heavenly Father didn’t just provide us with any Savior. Our Savior Jesus Christ willingly gave Himself unto us! He willingly suffered and died for us so that He can understand the pains that we will face in our mortal life. And He chooses to stand as a beacon in our darkest nights directing us back to safety.

To read more of Marie’s articles, click here.

Yet before we can be directed back, we need to quit looking down at our feet and worrying about where we stand, but instead look up! Look to the Lord, for He is our beacon in the night! When we look to our Savior and follow His plan, His words and teachings will be like a lamp to our feet, guiding our steps and thus lighting our path, guiding us safely back to our Father in Heaven. Our own lantern will burn brighter, but will still be insignificant when compared to the bright beacon that our Savior provides, as that is the light that we will rely on. Thomas S. Monson, former prophet and president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, taught:

“Anxiously we ask, “Is there a way to safety? Can someone guide us? Is there an escape from threatened destruction?”

 

The answer is a resounding yes! I counsel you: Look to the lighthouse of the Lord. There is no fog so dense, no night so dark, no gale so strong, no mariner so lost but what its beacon light can rescue. It calls, ‘This way to safety; this way to home'” (Thomas S. Monson, “The Lighthouse of the Lord,” New Era, February 2001).

The night of the faith walk, some of the young women were slightly scared to walk alone in the dark on the mountain. But once they began the faith walk and learned about the Atonement of Jesus Christ and of His love for us individually, they realized they were never alone. Not on the mountain and not in this lifetime. While we may feel like we’re lost on a mountainside from time to time, know this: regardless of the mistakes that we make or the hardships we face because of our choices, there is no fog dense enough to block the light provided by the beacon of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. He didn’t die for us so that we can walk this path alone with a dim light, but so that He can stand beside us, side by side and guiding us to safety. Jesus Christ is our Savior, the solid foundation on which we stand. He is our safe harbor, our beacon in the night.

Marie Yvonne

Marie Yvonne is a motivational and devotional speaker for teens and young adults. In her devotionals, she shares her personal testimony and journey of learning to accept herself as God created her. Her journey can also be found on social media and her personal blog and website, TheConfidenceToShine.com.

www.theconfidencetoshine.com

However, I had the thought, so I knew I needed to try to act. It seemed impossible. Social distance and go on a date seem to be two very different directives. How could I make them both work at the same time? Several years previously I had a roommate that drilled into my head “A date is a two-hour opportunity to get to know a child of God.” With that simple definition, I now had the idea to use technology. 

To say I was nervous to make the suggestion would be an understatement. I had no idea how it would be received. Think of it: “Oh hey, nice to meet you! We can’t really get together because many businesses are closed and even parks are off limits right now, plus I don’t allow strangers into my house… Let’s do a video call and see how this goes!”

The response was very positive and suddenly I found myself on video calls with several people. Others invited me to join them in an online board game while we would chat. It was amazing what could be accomplished. Real conversations with excellent questions started to form. I began to see some benefits of getting to know someone during this separation. 

Dallin H. Oaks taught:

“The best way to avoid divorce from an unfaithful, abusive, or unsupportive spouse is to avoid marriage to such a person. If you wish to marry well, inquire well.” (Emphasis added.)

With these new calls, I had the chance to ask questions both silly and deep. I could see their reactions and learn how they felt about things. Those that couldn’t carry on a conversation were easy to eliminate. I began taking time to figure out which questions gave me the most information. I had some excellent opportunity to get to know God’s sons. 

Since dating this way didn’t take a bunch of preparation on either of our parts, it became easy to have simple conversations and moments together on a regular basis. President Oaks further stated:

“Simple and more frequent dates allow both men and women to ‘shop around’ in a way that allows extensive evaluation of the prospects. The old-fashioned date was a wonderful way to get acquainted with a member of the opposite sex. It encouraged conversation.” 

To read more of Ashley’s articles, click here.

Another benefit was the honesty of really seeing people in their true form. I could go on a date while wearing sweats, and I sometimes answered my video calls without wearing make up. We all got the chance to see what we would really be getting ourselves into. The interactions also allowed me to feel like I got to really know someone before I met them in person. The foundation felt more solid. 

Please don’t misunderstand, I’m not saying this is the wave of the future regarding dating. I am saying where the Lord commands, He also provides a way to accomplish all things — even dating. This story is still unfolding. I don’t know the ending yet, but I do know that God is certainly in the details of our lives. He answers our prayers and He gives us gentle nudges as we do our best to follow through on what He is asking us to do. 

Ashley Dewey

Ashley Dewey is extremely talented at being single. Hobbies include awkward conversations with members of the opposite sex, repelling third dates, talking to boys about their girl problems and to girls about their boy problems. In her spare time she also has a very fulfilling school life, work life, and social life.

Besides being a professional single, Ashley is also a BYU graduate with a degree in linguistics (Aka word nerd). She enjoys studying other languages, particularly American Sign Language, and finds most all of them fascinating. She is currently pursuing a masters degree in Teaching English as a Second Language.

Ashley works most of the time and has often been accused of being a workaholic. Currently she works full time as a merchandiser and supervisor in a retail store, and part time doing social media work. On her day off she works (really it doesn’t feel like work) in the Provo LDS temple. The only kind of work she finds difficulty focusing on is house work.

Her favorite activities in her free time are reading, writing, creating social experiments, and spending time with great friends and family. Specific activities with those family and friends include: going to concerts, plays, dance recitals, BYU basketball and football games, and watching sports on television.

To me it’s amazing that these young men had such an impact. Their influence didn’t just change each other, their families, and country—as if that wasn’t enough—but they continue to influence generations untold more than two thousand years later. Remember that. Their influence continues even today.

These young men and their leaders are revered by many, and rightfully so. They are worthy of our respect and admiration. The incredible depiction in Arnold Friberg’s rendition of Helaman’s two thousand stripling warriors is well known by many members of the Church. I grew up thinking of those ripped warriors and drew comfort from the courage on their faces as Helaman led them into battle. I love that picture. I expect we all remember these examples of encouragement when we think of Helaman’s sons (or so they were called).

But now I am an old man and my perspective has changed somewhat when I think of those admirable sons. I expect they were more likely less physically commanding and menacing. Powerful? Absolutely. But it wasn’t their physical presence that made them indomitable. It was their faith in their mothers, their leaders, and in God. Together with these advocates, they were invincible. And that is perhaps the best truth of all from their example: when we are called to serve our Heavenly King, we too become part of an unconquerable force.

Now I could end the article right here, and we could figuratively return to our homes with encouragement and hope moving forward. But we know that times will get tough and stumbling blocks will become more prevalent and hedge up our way. I am writing these words today from my home. There are no typical church meetings this week, and like last week, we have been asked to hold services in our own homes. Tomorrow I am not going into the office. It’s been shut down. Thousands around the world have been affected by COVID-19, and the future of our communities, nation, and the world is unsure. Yet we need not be fearful. It is not our strength and willpower that will get us through this—it is our faith in God and His ability to make something overwhelming not just possible, but exemplary. He’ll provide a way. As we follow Him in faith, we become part of His unconquerable force. I still love the story of the two thousand stripling warriors, but I admire their commitment and faith even more than their physical prowess. That’s why they are worthy of our admiration.

Now, I want to make a seemingly sharp change in direction, but hang with me and you will find that it all works out in the end.

To read more of Walter’s articles, click here.

Often the young men and old men in our church are the ones in the limelight. The stories in the scripture are nearly all about men and boys, the focus of the priesthood (which is held by men) is prevalent in all we do as a church, and our presiding leaders are called from the ranks of boys and men. Yet often hidden in the background, unheralded in worldly terms, are mothers, sisters, daughters, and women of the Church who are faithfully making us stronger and giving our efforts meaning and value despite our many shortcomings. The world glamorizes beauty but fails to see the true magnificence of women. I think personally that it is because in its selfishness, women are used as objects of gratification, yet their value, worth, and exquisiteness far surpasses even that of their physical attractiveness. And maybe that is the best attribute of all in the story of the two thousand stripling warriors. These young men rightfully gave credit to their mothers for enabling them to overcome incredible obstacles:

47 Now they never had fought, yet they did not fear death; and they did think more upon the liberty of their fathers than they did upon their lives; yea, they had been taught by their mothers, that if they did not doubt, God would deliver them.

 

48 And they rehearsed unto me the words of their mothers, saying: We do not doubt our mothers knew it. (Alma 56:47-48)

One final anecdote: when my father was an older gentleman and we let him listen to a new song, he would ask us to print out the lyrics so he could follow along and enjoy all the meaning he didn’t want to miss. My mother too followed that example with a particular favorite piece she listened to daily during the last weeks of her life.

So when I selected the final video for this article, it was a lot more difficult than you might imagine. There are so many good examples of stripling warriors. I chose a video with lyrics I hope you enjoy.

“I Will Go And Do (2020 Youth Theme Song)“

No matter where I go
I know I’m not alone
I feel my Savior there beside me
He leads me through the night
He’s always been my guide
He promised He will never leave me
Though my burdens seem too much to bear
He’ll bless me
So whatever He commands

I will go and do
I will stand for truth
Though the world may back away
I will walk right through
I know if I follow Him
Follow Him in faith
He will ease my burdens
And He’ll provide a way
He’ll provide a way

When I feel overcome
And all my strength is gone
I think of all the ways He’s blessed me
My journey may seem long
But He’ll lift me with His love
A perfect love that’s never ending
He will give me
Give me all the strength I’m needing
So whatever He commands

I will go and do
I will stand for truth
Though the world may back away
I will walk right through
I know if I follow Him
Follow Him in faith
He will ease my burdens
And He’ll provide a way
He’ll provide a way

He’ll provide a way
For me to cross the desert
To sail across the ocean
If that’s where He sends me
I’ll follow His plan
I’ll do whatever He commands me
For I know that He will lead me
To the promised land

I will go and do
I will stand for truth
Though the world may shut Him out
I will make Him room
I know if I follow Him
Follow Him in Faith
He will ease my burdens
And He’ll provide a way
He’ll provide a way, eh
He’ll provide a way, eh

No matter where I go
I know I’m not alone
I feel my Savior there beside me

Walter Penning

In 1989, Walter Penning formed a consultancy based in Salt Lake City and empowered his clients by streamlining processes and building a loyal, lifetime customer base with great customer service. His true passion is found in his family. He says the best decision he ever made was to marry his sweetheart and have children. The wonderful family she has given him and her constant love, support, and patience amid life’s challenges is his panacea.

My first marriage was at the age of 17 and it lasted about three months. Two years later, I remarried the same person. This time, it lasted about nine years, and by then, I had two sons. A year later, I remarried. This marriage lasted about four years. Within the following year, I remarried again. A year later, we were sealed in the temple. This marriage lasted about eight years. Within another year, I again remarried. In due time, we were sealed in the temple after my previous sealing was cancelled. This marriage ended after nine years. At this point, after five failed marriages, I had to admit I wasn’t very good at selecting a husband. I did learn a lot as a result of the merry-go-round of relationships. Many have described me as an eternal optimist in my persistence. (I joke that sometimes it requires an entire courtyard of gentry to prepare a queen!)

Regardless of the serial short marriages, I never considered myself to be a “quitter.” Perhaps the most profound thing I learned was the undeniable importance of establishing a boundary beyond which I was unwilling to go. That boundary? I knew that no one had the right to kill my spirit — not even me. When I felt my heart’s inner light barely flickering and about to be snuffed out, I knew it was time to move on.  

In retrospect, I now understand that I had persistent abandonment issues from years of being in foster homes away from parents and siblings. Consequently, it isn’t too surprising that I didn’t want to be alone. Since I believed it was important to be morally clean, I kept jumping quickly from one marriage to another. I never thought of myself as being an “at risk” person, and in those days, I hadn’t even heard of PTSD.

I am reminded of a beautiful poem written by Carol Lynn Pearson in her book Goodbye, I Love You. Years later, she wrote a Facebook post about this poem:

“Please pass this thought along to someone at risk. Several years ago, a dear young friend of mine attempted suicide and gratefully was spared. I gave her a tiny poem I had written in a deep, dark place of my own—the second stanza two years after the first.

 

My young friend is now doing very well, and for a recent college project on suicide prevention, she created and sent to me an art project using the words of my little poem along with her drawing of a candle:

 

DRAMA IN TWO ACTS

I dim
I dim
I have no doubt
If someone blew
I would go out.

 

I did not.
I must be brighter
Than I thought.

—CLP

Thankfully, I had grown to the point where I was ready to stop the madness and petitioned Heavenly Father for His help. I still didn’t want to be alone, but I realized (finally) that I was not qualified to make a suitable choice. I completely let go of any details of what I thought I wanted in a husband. I only wanted who Heavenly Father wanted for me. I’ve heard many times, “Heavenly Father is preparing someone just for you.” I was completely ready to test that theory.

I spent weeks fervently praying, no idea what to expect — if anything. I was simply filled with the desire to do whatever Heavenly Father wanted me to do… Little did I know how quickly events begin moving into place once you “let go” and “let God.” Heavenly Father apparently knew that I seriously needed divine intervention. Looking back, I can easily see how all the pieces fit together over the next few weeks — but at the time, I had no clue that the confusing, lonely, mind-scrambling, and painful life I had known was about to forever slip away.

In October of 1994, I lived just south of Portland, Oregon. A girlfriend I hadn’t seen for decades was flying in from the Midwest to see me for a few days and I reminded her to be sure to bring her recommend because I wanted to go to the temple on Saturday morning.

As we stepped into the endowment room, I felt strongly the Spirit communicating to me that the companion the Lord had chosen for me was in that room. The feeling was so pronounced; a tangible presence I can only describe as goosebumps. There were only about a half dozen men seated in the room, all but one of them clearly in their 70s or 80s. One man that looked to be in his 40s was sitting by himself just a couple of rows behind the row I was sitting in. I kept turning my head to look at him. He eventually noticed, so then I kept my eyes forward. I thought that I might see him in the celestial room, but he wasn’t there. I started showing my friend the different artwork in the celestial room, and we climbed the stairs to the mezzanine. As we looked down on the room below, I felt the goosebumps again, and I turned around to look down the hall leading to the sealing rooms. The door at the end of the hall opened and there he was with another man. They entered into one of the sealing rooms and closed the door.  

My friend and I started walking down the hall past the sealing rooms and viewing the artwork on the walls. As we got to the door he had entered, the goosebumps started again. I stood there for a few moments just to make sure I wasn’t imagining what I was feeling. There was no doubt in my mind that the Spirit was communicating with me. We turned and went to the dressing rooms, then out into the parking lot. I had a distinct feeling we were supposed to go back into the temple. I remembered I wanted to show my friend the unique baptistry, and we went back into the temple. There was a baptism session in progress, so we decided to get something to eat in the cafeteria near the baptistry.  

We got our food and were sitting along the far wall in the cafeteria. After a few minutes, I started feeling the goosebumps again. I looked up and scanned the room — and at the exit from the food line, there he was. He was coming around the end of the food service area with another gentleman. They sat at a table not far from ours. I could hear them talking. He mentioned where he lived and how many years he’d been a member. He had a deep, resonant voice that did not escape my notice.

When my friend and I finished our meal, we went to put our trays away. There were some friends seated at a table by the dishwashing area and we stopped and spoke to them for a moment. I looked over at his table and he was sitting alone, so I excused myself by saying, “There’s a light over there I need to go check out.”

As I approached his table, he looked up and had that “deer in the headlights” expression on his face. I introduced myself and said I wanted him to know I appreciated the spirit he brought to the temple. I had no way of knowing at that point whether he was single. I just knew the persistent goosebumps definitely grasped my attention. We spoke for just a few moments and then my friend and I left.

That evening, my sister, my friend, and I were having a great time doing “girl things.” All the sudden, I said something about this feeling like a slumber party. Then I said, “I know what girls do at slumber parties! They call the boys!” I’d been a secretary for several years and I knew how to find information. So I called information in the town he mentioned he lived in. (I had his name from when I introduced myself — so what was a girl to do?) 

 I got the phone number and I asked if there was an address listed. There was and the operator gave it to me. I was equipped with the information I needed. I didn’t really think about the fact that I had no way of knowing whether he was single or married; I just dialed the number and waited. I heard a younger voice say “Hello?” (It was definitely not his deep voice.) The next words out of my mouth were, “Is your mother there?” “No, my mom doesn’t live here. She lives in town.” “Is your Dad there?” “Sure.”

The next voice I heard was the deep, resonant voice from the cafeteria. “Is this Brother Hoskins?” “Hoskins? No, this is Brother Hopkins.” “Oh, I’m sorry. Please excuse the call.” And I hung up.

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All right!  Now I knew I had the right person and his son’s mother didn’t live there. I had his mailing address and I wasn’t afraid to use it. I sat down and wrote him a note, telling him once again that I appreciated the spirit he brought to the temple. I also added that I didn’t know if it was appropriate for me to extend my friendship, but if he was looking for a new friend, I would enjoy getting to know him better. 

I addressed the envelope and put on a stamp. The next morning, I dropped it into the mail. (I refrained from spritzing the envelop with perfume!)

I think it was a couple of weeks before I got a response. When it came, it was on a single sheet from a small note pad. Now, I don’t know if I’m the only one that reads the last couple of pages of a novel first to see if I like the ending enough to read the whole story. I employed the same strategy with this note.

I started by reading the last sentence:  “Getting your note was an answer to my prayers.”  

Part two coming soon!

Featured image: The Portland, Oregon Temple of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints via ChurchofJesusChrist.org.

Sonja Hopkins

Sonja lives with her husband, Dale, on Anderson Island, Washington. She and her husband are Church Service Missionaries serving in the Addiction Recovery Program, focusing on pornography and sex addiction. She is also a certified life coach and teaches “Life Skills for Emotional Self-Mastery” in her stake twice a month. She does not teach you only to process something traumatic done to you in the past; rather, she helps you learn to feel it, heal it, and LET GO of whatever you still do to yourself and to others in order to cope with what was done to you in the past.