It’s Not Fair!

Based on a talk by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland given in the April, 2012 General Conference.

One of the hallmarks of having a child around is hearing the phrase, “It’s not fair!” If anyone can spot unfairness a mile off, it is a child. As we grow older we are often plagued with bouts of “It’s-not-fair-itis.” If we are complaining about one person’s treatment of another that is one thing. But if we are referring to the Lord when we start laying blame about fairness then we need to step back and take a look at our accusation a little more closely.

The extent of our complaints

We hear people complaining about those who seem to be born into more blessed circumstances than we were. Perhaps they lived during a simpler time, or had more money, or were born into power and prestige. Perhaps they were born with magnificent talents that awed vast audiences or made them world famous for their abilities.

Perhaps the complaint is about spiritual advantages, like those who were born during the three generations among the Nephite people starting about the time of Christ. We may even have felt a twinge of envy about those who will be born in the Millennium who will never lose their way, live in a great society ruled by Christ, and never have to taste of death. Kind of hard not to be just a tiny bit envious of that!

And what about those who got to be born during the days of the great patriarchs, as opposed to those who had to wait almost six thousand years to come to earth to live in the last days when wickedness was worse than at any other time in history. Then again, there are those prophets who wished they could be born in our day because of the greatness of the revelations and the sure footing of the kingdom of God on earth, and that every male was able to hold the priesthood, creating a generation and a kingdom of high priests.

It seems like the grass is always greener somewhere else. If you were born in the days of Adam, when you died you had to wait almost four thousand years before you could be resurrected, but those who were reserved for this day and age had to wait almost six thousand years before being born into mortality. Sometimes is just seems that no matter what the Lord does his children won’t be happy. If you have ever had children of your own, that probably sounds familiar.

Parable of the labourers in Matthew 20

Elder Holland gives a great talk on this parable in the linked Conference talk. Here is a quick paraphrase of the first half of his talk.

Back in the Savior’s day if you didn’t own your own farm or flock or herd, or didn’t have a profession, if someone didn’t hire you for a day’s labor, you and your family went hungry. Their workday went from 6:00 a.m. until 6:00 p.m. All these verses come from Matthew 20.

1 For the kingdom of heaven is like unto a man that is an householder, which went out early in the morning to hire labourers into his vineyard.

2 And when he had agreed with the labourers for a penny a day, he sent them into his vineyard.

Those who were lucky got picked first thing. They spent the whole day working, knowing they were going to be able to feed their family that night. They were happy they were working for someone who had agreed to pay them a completely fair day’s wage. Life was good, despite the work in the hot sun. The heat of the day was to be expected.

But then the householder needed more laborers, so he went out and hired another batch of workers a few hours later.

3 And he went out about the third hour, and saw others standing idle in the marketplace,

4 And said unto them; Go ye also into the vineyard, and whatsoever is right I will give you. And they went their way.

Notice that he did not specify a wage with this group, just that it would be a fair wage. This group had fretted for three hours wondering if they would be able to get work so they could eat that night. They were very grateful for the work.

5 Again he went out about the sixth and ninth hour, and did likewise.

6 And about the eleventh hour he went out, and found others standing idle, and saith unto them, Why stand ye here all the day idle?

7 They say unto him, Because no man hath hired us. He saith unto them, Go ye also into the vineyard; and whatsoever is right, that shall ye receive.

A total of four times during the day the householder went out and hired more men to work. These last men had waited all day long, worrying about not being able to feed their family and wondering what they would do if they couldn’t get something, anything to earn some money for food. When the householder said he would pay them a fair wage, they probably didn’t expect much, but they were so grateful to have anything at all, they quickly embraced the opportunity, and I am guessing they worked hard during that last bit of the day.

Finally it was evening, and time to pay everyone. He told his steward to pay the newest hires first. Each of the men hired at the end of the day received a penny for their labor. Seeing this, even though they had been happy to work a full day for a penny when they got hired, those who were hired first expected to be paid a higher wage.

8 So when even was come, the lord of the vineyard saith unto his steward, Call the labourers, and give them their hire, beginning from the last unto the first.

9 And when they came that were hired about the eleventh hour, they received every man a penny.

10 But when the first came, they supposed that they should have received more; and they likewise received every man a penny.

The question is this: Were all the men justly and fairly treated? Was each paid according to the wage or under the conditions agreed to upon hire? The answer is yes, of course. So why were those hired at the beginning of the day upset? They were jealous. They were afflicted with a case of “It’s-not-fair-itis.”

It’s-not-fair-itis

This disease called It’s-not-fair-itis is an illness born of short sightedness. Most all of us suffer from it at one point or another. The men in the parable were jealous of those who were paid a full wage for only a partial day’s labor because they assumed that there was something inherently unfair about someone agreeing to work for one wage and having to work more than another person who gets the same wage, who also agreed to work for that amount.

Let’s bring it into the gospel realm. Joe was a faithful member of the Church all his life. He was baptized at the age of eight, went on a mission at the right time, married happily in the temple as he was supposed to, raised a mostly righteous family, and lived a good long life, filled with the joys of the gospel.

Sam was not born into the Church. He grew up doing what he wanted, got into trouble as a teenager, pretty much squandered his young adult years experimenting with any worldly practice or philosophy that caught his eye, but found a woman he happily married and spent his life with. In his seventies he became acquainted with a middle-aged LDS family who introduced him to the gospel. It appealed to him. He joined the Church, and a year or so later he and his wife went to the temple. Only one of his several children joined the Church a few years later, but not early enough to be sealed to them before Sam and his wife died.

So what is the wage earned by each of these couples? What covenant did Joe and his wife keep that Sam and his wife did not keep? The answer is there is no difference between the two. Each of them kept their baptismal covenants. Each of them were keeping the commandments when they died, and both couples had been sealed in the temple and were faithful to their covenants.

What were the differences between the two couples? Joe spent his whole life safe and secure in the knowledge that he was surrounded by the truth. He had his whole life filled with the gift of the Holy Ghost, service to others, and the use of the priesthood power of God to bless his family. All of his children were sealed to them upon birth because they had already been sealed in the temple.

Sam and his wife lived life wandering among the philosophies and practices of the world, not knowing there was anything better out there. They knew they would not be married after one of them died, and there was no such thing as a hope of keeping any of their children after death. Though they found great joy in the gospel message, they had missed out on using it to raise their family, and only one of their children joined the Church, but were not members long enough to be sealed to them before they died. But they were faithful in their covenants and in exercising their faith and using his priesthood to bless the lives of others as long as they were able to before death.

It’s all fair

Is there any place in the gospel we study that says that the Lord loves one batch of children over another? Is there any place that says that if you were born at this or that time in history, or if you are of this race or that race that you will receive greater blessings? Is not part of the good news, the gospel of Christ that all people, at any time in the history of the world, if they will embrace the teachings of Christ they will receive the same blessings and honors?

Does not our Father tell us he is no respecter of persons? Aren’t we told, without any kind of caveat or catch, that anyone who obeys a commandment will receive its blessings? Have you ever heard of a time limit placed on any commandment? Has the Lord, at any time, said that if you don’t live a commandment for x number of years you will not receive the blessings? No. He never said that.

Final Thoughts

When we feel a case of It’s-not-fair-itis coming on, we need to remind ourselves that it doesn’t matter when we were born into mortality. It doesn’t matter what nation we are born into or what culture. It doesn’t matter what our gifts are, our social position, our educational level, our intelligence. The only thing that matters to the Lord is that when we learn about the gospel of Christ we accept it and live it. When and where are immaterial. All He cares about is that we accept the covenants that will open the doors to our exaltation. If that opportunity comes in the next life, so be it. If it comes at a ripe old age, so be it. All that really matters is that we are willing to embrace Christ’s gift and live the commandments. The Lord is ultimately fair. He always has been, and always will be.