Today we received notification of Alvin’s transplant surgery. From the moment he was diagnosed with end-stage renal failure seven years ago we have pushed forward with faith, diligence and an astounding amount of courage and strength. My husband has remained unfailingly cheerful and optimistic even when the greatest of trials weighed him down. Me, there were times I shut myself in the bathroom where no one could hear and cried. Nonetheless, the moment is finally here. A chance for my husband to live a life free of dialysis and the innumerable dialysis induced traumas and illnesses.
As I have paused amongst the hustle bustle of trying to get everything organized and in place (you cannot imagine the amount of doctors appointments, paperwork, etc. that have be waded through) I have begun to realize the magnitude of the Lord’s hand in this miracle.
Thirteen years ago Alvin and I were married for time and all eternity in the Bountiful Temple. It was an extremely sacred experience which culminated a very long start and stop courtship. We have been very happy since that day, except for the instance of Alvin’s health.
Faith is a very simple thing. There were times when it appeared Alvin would not survive the illness striking him down. At those times I became so confused because I was told to have faith and I did and do, but I also realize that we must be willing to submit ourselves to the Father’s will. That is simply not as easy as it sounds.
President Gordon B. Hinckley, the 15th called prophet in these modern times, said:
We know not all that lies ahead of us. We live in a world of uncertainty. For some, there will be great accomplishment. For others, disappointment. For some, much of rejoicing and gladness, good health, and gracious living. For others, perhaps sickness and a measure of sorrow. We do not know. But one thing we do know. Like the Polar Star in the heavens, regardless of what the future holds, there stands the Redeemer of the world, the Son of God, certain and sure as the anchor of our immortal lives. He is the rock of our salvation, our strength, our comfort, the very focus of our faith.
In sunshine and in shadow we look to Him, and He is there to assure and smile upon us.
He is the central focus of our worship. He is the Son of the living God, the Firstborn of the Father, the Only Begotten in the flesh. He is “risen from the dead, … the firstfruits of them that slept” (1 Corinthians 15:20). He is the Lord who shall come again “to reign on the earth over his people” (D&C 76:63; see also Micah 4:7; Revelation 11:15).
None so great has ever walked the earth. None other has made a comparable sacrifice or granted a comparable blessing. He is the Savior and the Redeemer of the world. I believe in Him. I declare His divinity without equivocation or compromise. I love Him. I speak the name of Jesus Christ in reverence and wonder. He is our King, our Lord, our Master, the living Christ, who stands on the right hand of His Father. He lives! He lives, resplendent and wonderful, the living Son of the living God. (Gordon B. Hinckley, “We Testify of Jesus Christ,” Ensign, Mar 2008, 4–7)
For one, even as I, who might struggle with understanding where faith leaves off and God’s will picks up I have come to a single conclusion:
We must have faith that God’s will is the best way to go.
I do know this, in times of great despair I have felt the comfort and love of my Savior sweep over me. At moments when I feared I was facing Alvin’s death, the peace, despite the overwhelming sorrow, swept over me and calm settled within my soul.
Now is a time of great rejoicing for our family. We are so thrilled Alvin will be receiving a new kidney and a new lease on life. We have faith that whatever the outcome it will be in our best interest. But to be honest, we’re believing the best of everything is going to happen and preparing for the worst. And we will lean on our Rock, our Redeemer . . . for only through Him can we truly find the faith to continue down this path.
