Fulfilling the Purpose of Relief Society
Filed under: Discussion of General Relief Society Meetings, Finding Your Place in Relief Society, Service
There is one word used by Julie B. Beck, General Relief Society President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (nicknamed Mormons), in reference to how women of this Church might fulfill their purpose in this worldwide organization: revelation.
“We can do the work of the Lord in His way when we seek, and act on personal revelation. Without personal revelation, we cannot succeed. If we heed personal revelation, we cannot fail.”
In Joel 2:28-29, we are given a prophecy concerning revelation and the women of the latter day:
And it shall come to pass afterward, that I will pour out my spirit upon all flesh; and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, your old men shall dream dreams, your young men shall see visions: And also upon the servants and upon the handmaids in those days will I pour out my spirit.
Personal revelation is attributed to righteous men and women, and must be used with wisdom according to the inspirations of the Holy Spirit.
But what is revelation? How can we know we’re receiving it if we don’t fully understand what it is?
“Revelation is communication from God to His children. This guidance comes through various channels according to the needs and circumstances of individuals, families, and the [Latter-day Saint] Church as a whole…According to our faithfulness, we can receive revelation to help us with our specific personal needs, responsibilities, and questions and to help us strengthen our testimony” (Gospel Topics, Revelation).
Personal revelation does not come easily. Neal A. Maxwell, late latter day apostle, tells us that revelation “requires serious mental effort on our part….Revelation is not a matter of pushing buttons, but of pushing ourselves, often aided by fasting, scripture study, and personal pondering. Most of all, revelaion requires us to have a sufficient degree of personal righteousness, so that on occasion revelation may come to the righteous, unsolicited” (Neal A. Maxwell, “Revelation,” First Worldwide Leadership Training Meeting, Jan. 11, 2003, 5).
How does revelation assist the women of the Mormon Church in making the most of this Relief Society organization? I hope in sharing a rather personal experience I might be able to help you understand.
Several weeks ago I began to feel listless. Certain things hadn’t come together as I’d hoped, and I suddenly found myself with a lot of time on my hands. I’m the sort of person who will knit scarves while watching television, so suddenly finding myself with so much free time felt beyond daunting.
I began to pray and to fast about finding a purpose and good use for all this extra time. I received two answers, both of which I know were revelation.
First, to take care of my children. This seems like an easy thing to do, and I was giving my little ones a lot of my time already. So why the extra emphasis?
Over the past weeks I’ve come to realize these children, and all the precious spirits who have come to earth at this time, need more attention, more teaching, more preparing to deal with the wickedness now present. I was doing a good job, but I needed to do better.
The second revelation came to me as I felt strongly inspired to take some leftover dinner to a sister in our ward (local congregation). This particular woman was in dire circumstances, and my husband as bishop could not do as much as he’d wanted to help.
I went to the sister’s house, gave her the food, and we talked. She was feeling very low at the time, and, as many of us have felt at one time or another, frustrated that even when she was trying to get her life back together things still kept going wrong.
In that moment words came to my mind, words I was supposed to tell her, words she needed to know. This had never happened to me before. Among those words were these, “The Lord sent me to you tonight. He loves you so much He sent me to you.”
As I drove away a truth settled over me, one I believe illustrates what one individual can do in fulfilling the grand and beautiful purpose of Relief Society: we are called upon to minister to sisters in need. We are given revelations on how we might best serve, or comfort, or teach those who are lacking.
Just yesterday this was done for me by Sister Averett in my ward. I’d had a really rough day, and couldn’t understand why. She felt strongly inspired to come to me. We talked, and an answer was given. How grateful I am for loving sisters like herself who are daily working for righteous purposes, so that she was ready to give help when I needed it.
For anyone who reads this I leave you my testimony. I know Heavenly Father put this remarkable organization of women in place because He knows the power of a righteous woman. I also know that if we desire to obtain personal revelations, we must be ever striving to deserve such blessings. We need to keep our lives in sync with the Lord’s ways, and our hearts open. Only then can truth be bestowed upon us.
A Woman’s Responsibility to Increase in Faith and Personal Righteousness
Filed under: Discussion of General Relief Society Meetings, Finding Your Place in Relief Society, Self-Worth
An organization is only as strong as its’ members. When discussing religious organizations, the strength is measured largely in an individual’s faith and personal righteousness.
In the Sept. 2008 Women’s General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (nicknamed the Mormons), Julie B. Beck, Relief Society General President, addressed this very idea when discussing how to better help the women of the Latter-day Saint Church fulfill their purpose within this world-wide organization.
“To do our part under the plan of the Lord, we are to increase our faith and personal righteousness. Membership in the Church requires faith, which we nourish throughout our lives with great ‘diligence, and patience, and long-suffering’ (Alma 32:43)” (Julie B. Beck, “Fulfilling the Purpose of Relief Society”, Women’s General Conference, 2008).
Faith and personal righteousness are principles that must be acted upon before they can increase. They must be tested, or experimented with, before we can gain a true and honest testimony of their power in our personal lives. One of the most well known examples for members of the Mormon Church of how the principle of faith (and subsequently all other principles) can be tested to know of it’s truthfulness can be found in the Book of Mormon, another testament of Jesus Christ. Feel free to read Alma 32:28-43 for the exact scriptural account.
We start with an object lesson, that of comparing the principle we are hoping to gain a testimony to a seed. You plant the seed, water it, give it plenty of sunshine, and wait to see if it will grow. If it grows, it is a good seed.
By the same token we are given principles to live. We must take one and plant it within our hearts, not rejecting it even before it has a chance to grow. We must nurture this idea through scripture study, through pondering, and through prayer. If the ‘seed’ is good, it will “begin to swell within your breasts; and when you feel these swelling motions, ye will begin to say within yourselves—It must needs be that this is a good seed, or that the word is good, for it beginneth to enlarge my soul; yea, it beginneth to enlighten my understanding, yea, it beginneth to be delicious to me” (Alma 32:28).
The gospel of Jesus Christ is filled with many good seeds that can begin to enlarge our souls and enlighten our minds, but it is not enough to simply let them sprout. We must work to allow these little seeds to grow into grand trees with deep roots. It is necessary to continue working through more study, prayer and pondering, but also by living the principles. Now it is time to put them to the test.
Sister Beck brings to mind an extraordinary example of what it means to have our faith put to the test through the trials faced by women at the time of the Restoration of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
“Early pioneer women were driven from homes and persecuted because of their faith. Others survived fires and floods. They crossed oceans and walked thousands of miles, tolerating dirt, illness, and near starvation to help build the Lord’s kingdom on the earth. Many of them buried husbands, children, parents, and siblings along the way. Why did they do this?
“The did it because the fire of their faith burned in their souls. These remarkable women were not seeking fine clothing, greater leisure, large earthly mansions, or more possessions…they had a conviction and a testimony that the restored gospel of Jesus Christ was true and that the Lord needed them to do their part in establishing His kingdom on the earth” (ibid).
We work most passionately towards those things we have a firm conviction of and testimony in. For most women in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, a firm and abiding testimony of the truthfulness not only of the Church, not only of the Relief Society organization within it, but also of the individual and sacred role of each and every person within it is not only sincere, but a power to be reckoned with.
For those who have not yet gained this strong testimony, the path to receive it has been given in Alma. It is only up to the individual person to take the first step.
I have a firm testimony of this Church, and have since I was seventeen years old. I have put the principle of faith to the test and have been blessed to see my faith come out stronger. I am still coming to recognize the extraordinary power behind this organization of women, and of the remarkable things that can be accomplished when we are all working together.
Perhaps that’s because, as Sister Beck indicated:
“Their pursuit of personal righteousness was a daily effort to become more like the Savior through repentance, scripture study, prayer, obedience to commandments, and through seeking after everything ‘virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy’” (ibid).
Understanding the Power of Relief Society
Filed under: Discussion of General Relief Society Meetings, Finding Your Place in Relief Society, Self-Worth, Supporting the Priesthood
The Lord has appointed each sister belonging to Relief Society to help, support, and further the work of the priesthood within the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormons) in building up the kingdom of God. It is a sacred responsibility to be met with soberness and a sincere desire to understand the purpose and power behind this massive organization of women.
In a recent Women’s General Conference of the Latter-day Saint Church, Julie B. Beck (Relief Society General President) spoke on how we might fulfill the purpose of Relief Society. She begins by informing us we must first search to understand why Relief Society was established in the first place.
It is impossible to understand why we have an organization for women in the Church without having an understanding of the Restoration of the gospel of Jesus Christ. The Lord, knowing about the calamities that would come to pass in these latter days, spoke to His servant Joseph Smith Jr, “and gave him commandments;….
“That faith…might increase in the earth;
“That [His] everlasting covenant might be established;
“That the fullness of [His] gospel might be proclaimed by the weak and the simple unto the ends of the world” (D&C 1:17, 21-23).
The work of the Lord is accomplished as His gospel is “preached unto every nation, and kindred, and tongue, and people” (D&C 133:37) and as His everlasting covenant is established through the ordinances of the temple (Julie B. Beck, “Fulfilling the Purpose of Relief Society,” 2008).
Throughout history the Lord has asked the women of His church to help further the work of building up His kingdom, beginning with the first woman who was placed on this earth, even Mother Eve. This remarkable woman was chosen to be a helpmeet to Adam.
“And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him” (Genesis 2:18).
This term ‘helpmeet’ has lost much of the original meaning. If we were to think of a helpmeet in modern terms, we think of someone who is inferior, an assistant, or subordinate. This is not the correct and intended meaning behind the words used to describe Eve.
According to the biblical scholar David Freedman, the Hebrew work translated there into English as “help” is ezer. This word is a combination of two roots, one meaning “to rescue,” “to save,” and the other meaning “to be strong.”…
[Freedman] concluded, “When God creates Eve…, His intent is that she will be – unlike the animals – ‘a power (or strength) equal to him.’”…
Eve came to Adam uniquely prepared to perform her assigned duties, to act as a companion with the first high priest in mortality – to be a partner with him” (Campbell, Beverly, “Eve and the Choice Made in Eden,” Bookcraft, 2003, pp.23-25).
This message, that woman was created to be an equal partner with men, is essential in order to have the faith and confidence necessary for any woman who is ready and willing to build up God’s kingdom.
Christ himself encouraged both Mary and Martha to participate in His work, to listen to His words and teachings, and to act upon them (Luke 10:38-42). This encouragement has not stopped. Women across the world work to bring light, aid, and love to all those in need. This is also true of the women’s organization of the Latter-day Saint Church.
“The organization of Relief Society in 1842 mobilized the collective power of the women and their specific assignments to build the Lord’s kingdom, just as the organization of priesthood quorums gave men specific responsibilities….
“To summarize, the purpose of Relief Society, as established by the Lord, is to organize, teach, and inspire His daughters to prepare them for the blessings of eternal life” (Julie B. Beck, “Fulfilling the Purpose of Relief Society,” 2008).
If we are to come together as a powerful force in building up the kingdom of God, women must come to realize their worth in the eyes of God: not better than, nor lesser than, but equal to our beloved companions here on this earth. When this fact is sealed into the center of our beings, we will prove a force the likes of which cannot be made to stumble.
Testimony in Music
Filed under: Hymns, Music and the Scriptures, Power of Hymns
“To hear this loved song rendered by an assembly of devoted Latter-day Saints is a spiritual baptism” (Stories of Our Mormon Hymns, Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1968, p. 108).
~ J. Spencer Cornwall
Hymns are said to be a prayer offered to the Lord:
“For my soul delighteth in the song of the heart; yea, the song of the righteous is a prayer unto me, and it shall be answered with a blessing upon their heads” (Doctrine & Covenants 25:12).
Certainly this is true. As we read through the words of hymns, no matter what religion or denomination we may claim as our own, they reflect the prayers of our hearts. As we sing with reverence such sacred themes, surely they are counted as among the most hallowed of supplications.
Hymns can serve another purpose. They can help us bear testimony when at times our own words do not seem sufficient.
The above quote was rendered by a man after hearing the song “I Know That My Redeemer Lives.” Far more than a prayer, this song has acted as a fervent testimony of many who love and revere the Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
This beloved hymn gives reference to two scriptures from the Bible. The first can be found in Job. The words are simple, powerful, and straightforward:
“For I know that my redeemer liveth, and that he shall stand at the latter day upon the earth” (Job 19:25).
Job didn’t just believe, he knew his Redeemer was real. In those first seven words he bears testimony of what the Holy Spirit had witnessed to him.
The second scripture can be found in Psalm 104:33-34.
“I will sing unto the LORD as long as I live: I will sing praise to my God while I have my being. My meditation of him shall be sweet: I will be glad in the LORD.”
From these two scriptures we begin to glean what it means to share a testimony through song. Anyone can have a testimony of the Redeemer, if they ask of God with real intent, maintaining a humble heart and a contrite spirit. When this testimony is gained, it can be a powerful tool in helping to bring others back to a remembrance of who they are, that they are infinitely loved, and that through the Atonement there is hope for repentance.
When a testimony is gained, we cannot help but declare the intense and beautiful feelings felt deep within our hearts. If our own words don’t seem to be enough, we can always turn to our sacred hymns to say what we cannot.
“He lives! All glory to his name!
He lives, my Savior, still the same.
Oh, sweet the joy this sentence gives:
‘I know that my Redeemer lives!’”
(Hymns, no. 95)
The Power of Women to Create
Filed under: Discussion of General Relief Society Meetings, Self-Worth, Service
In the recent General Women’s Conference for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (nicknamed the Mormon Church), there seemed to be a specific theme that ran throughout most of the talks.
At first I thought it came to my attention simply because this particular subject is something that’s not only been on my mind a lot lately, but in my heart. It wasn’t until I began to talk with many other women that I began to realize it was a subject truly needed at this time, as it seems to have struck the hearts of them as well.
For me this particular theme was best illustrated in President Dieter F. Uchtdorf’s talk, wherein he told of one particular difference between men and women through the example of making dinner.
His wife, he tells us, puts together a grand meal. The food, something which she will often cook from one of the many countries they’ve visited, is delicious to the taste. She labors over the meal, wanting to make it a pleasant event. Everything down to the dinner presentation is remarkable to behold, enticing to the eye and nose.
Regardless of how wonderful the meal turns out to be, however, no matter how much those who had the pleasure of partaking say how much they enjoyed the meal, this sweet woman could always find a little something she should have done better.
“I really think this dish could have used a bit more curry,” she might say. Or perhaps, “I might try putting in some cinnamon next time.”
Then President Uchtdorf went on to describe how he prepares a meal. According to his wife his best dish is, “fried eggs…sunny side up.” He also told us how he prepares his own particularly favorite dish. He slices a few pieces of french bread, then browns them on both sides.
“It doesn’t matter that the eggs are a bit greasy, or if the toast is a bit burnt,” he claims. He laughingly proclaims he feels himself a hero for having cooked anything at all!
It was at this point so many things clicked for me. All throughout the talks I heard snippets of, “Nothing we do seems to be good enough.” This quickly translated to, “I don’t seem to be good enough.”
I’m thinking in particular of the women of this Church. Often it has seemed to me we place so much pressure on ourselves to be more than perfect, because we have the restored gospel in place. Yet this is typical of women everywhere.
We take so much upon ourselves we’re suffocating, and still we think we should have done more. We create something beautiful and then tell everyone what’s wrong with it. We undermine ourselves when our Heavenly Father is ready and willing to tell us how extraordinary we are.
We find too many things wrong with everything we do right.
Yet this is not God’s view of us and our works. We are God’s children, the same God who created us in the first place. He gave unto us two of His greatest traits: the desire to create, and extraordinary compassion.
This desire and ability to create comes so easily to some. I am one of those, because of the gifts my Heavenly Father has blessed me with. I take to things easily, I can pick up a new hobby as easily as I pick up my babies. I tinker at the piano, I’ve crocheted many an afgan, I can bake a mean cookie, I can draw a little, and take a few pictures.
The funny thing is, the things people most seem to appreciate about me, and that I appreciate about others, can’t be handed over, eaten, or seen. To create something Godly goes far beyond what we can see and hear. It involves more than a beautiful voice or how well someone handles a paintbrush.
I know a woman who can create the sense of safety to anyone who will trust enough to let her in. I know another who can create overwhelming love, no matter who walks through her door.
I know a woman who can create motivation in those who have given up. I know another who can create a smile in every person she meets, even those who will rarely smile for anyone else.
I know so many women who have the power to create magical things, who hold within themselves Godlike traits, though they rarely understand what power they hold.
If you’re not sure what your gifts are, how your greatest creations have blessed the lives of others, pray for understanding. Then, listen for the whisperings of the Holy Spirit.
Remember, the more you trust and rely on the promptings and inspirations of the Holy Spirit, the more your capacity to create will increase. It’s when we trust too much in our weak, mortal selves that we loose sight of the extraordinary beings God has created.
Today my hope for all of you is to find the little things you create. Whether it be happy, healthy, well-loved children, a quilt you’ve been working hard on, answering a need you feel greatly inspired to follow, it doesn’t matter. Just rejoice in the opportunity to create, to be like our Heavenly Father. Never mind everything you might think is wrong with your creation, and focus on every little thing that’s right.
Rejoice in being a woman.
Teens: Find the Spirit in Quiet Moments
Filed under: Life Lessons, Living the Gospel, Peer Pressure
It was a defining moment in our recent Sunday School class. We had been talking about the need and value of repentance, of the happiness it can bring to those who come back to the light and love of Christ, of the need to let go of the things of this world, when a woman raised her hand.
“I have a sister who turned away from the gospel years ago,” she began. “She lives her life in a way she was not taught growing up, and makes choices that go against many of Christ’s teachings.”
I began to wonder precisely where this conversation was going, and could feel the intensity of this woman’s need to be given a firm answer.
“She has more money than I could ever dream of. She’s traveled all over, she has had opportunities opened up for her left and right. I can’t see that she’s not happy.”
This woman paused for a moment, gathering herself. “My husband and I barely get by. We sometimes wonder where money will come from to pay the bills. I hardly see him for all the hours he works, and so much of the time I’m miserable.”
Before I go to the answer our teacher gave, I want you to take a moment to think of your own life. Which of these two women do you relate to more? Do you spend much of your time doing everything, obtaining objects, living life to it’s fullest?
Or do you find yourself spending much of your time watching others have everything, others who do not live up to your same standards, while you stand miserably to the side barely scraping by?
Is there really a way to have less in this life and still be happy?
Our teacher helped bring a very special point home.
“The things of this world are in your face,” she said. “They’re too loud, they’re too bright and shiny, they’re too showy, they’re simply too much.”
Why is this concept important? Because of the second part of the answer.
“Things that bring us true and everlasting happiness, otherwise known as things of the Spirit, those are found in the quiet times of our lives.”
We are taught the voice of the Lord, or the influence of the Holy Spirit, comes to us as a whisper. When we’ve put much of our focus on the things of the world we’ve innundated ourselves with television, with video games, with flashy clothes and jewelry. We’re more concerned with having the best car rather than finding peace.
If you feel unsatisfied in life, if you’ve been growing bitter over not having everything your friends have, search for the quiet moments in your life. Listen for the quiet whisperings of the Holy Spirit. As you do this, you will find peace instead of jealousy, love instead of misery.
Teens: Finding Tender Mercies in Trials
Filed under: For the Strength of the Youth, Life Lessons, Living the Gospel
“But behold, I, Nephi, will show unto you that the tender mercies of the Lord are over all those whom he hath chosen, because of their faith, to make them mighty even unto the power of deliverance” (1 Nephi 1:20).
I’ve been thinking about tender mercies a lot lately. They’ve been thrust up in my face lately. In a good way, that is.
We all have trials. It’s simply a way of life, and one of the most effective ways for us to learn and grow spiritually. Sometimes we bring these trials on ourselves through our own choices. Other times the harsh lessons of life are learned through the choices of others, and the effects of those choices on us.
Closely connected to both of these are the lessons we learn through experiences our Heavenly Father asks us to endure.
Recently someone known by my family lost a son-in-law in a plane crash. This son-in-law and his wife had recently had a baby. The crash was tragic, heart-rending, and world shattering for those who loved him. It took the couple’s bishop (lay clergyman) to help this young widow and the extended family search for the tender mercies of the Lord. He told them if they looked they could find little ways in which they were being prepared for this awful event. The bishop encouraged each family member to write these things down, so they might be strengthened in their struggles.
So what are the tender mercies of the Lord? David A. Bednar, latter-day apostle of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (nicknamed the Mormon Church), asks and answers this very question.
“Through personal study, observation, pondering, and prayer, I believe I have come to better understand that the Lord’s tender mercies are the very personal and individualized blessings, strength, protection, assurances, guidance, loving-kindnesses, consolation, support, and spiritual gifts which we receive from and because of and through the Lord Jesus Christ. Truly, the Lord suits ‘his mercies according to the conditions of the children of men’ (D&C 46:15)” (David A. Bednar, “The Tender Mercies of the Lord,” Ensign, May 2005, 99).
As teens in this world today, you are asked to endure, to fight against, to protect yourself from things your parents can barely begin to imagine, just as their parents could not comprehend what being a teen was like all those years ago. You have been saved for this time, because your spirits are vastly strong. If you choose to follow the Lord’s way, Satan will be hard pressed to sway you otherwise. Unfortunately, this will not stop him from trying.
They key word in that paragraph is choose. We always have a choice. If we continually strive to choose the Lord’s way, He will prepare us and strengthen us through His tender mercies, “to make [us] mighty even unto the power of deliverance.” In fact, I know that even when we haven’t been following His path, He will often send us strength through reminders to come back to Him.
My challenge to you is the same of the bishop who counseled the grieving family. If you have been, are now, or will one day face trials that seem unbearable, take time out to actively look for the tender mercies of the Lord. Look for ways you were prepared beforehand. Search for things that are helping you now. Be ready to recognize the little blessings that are to come. It may take time for some of us to find the good things, but with much prayer and practice, looking for tender mercies can become second nature.
Then, perhaps, we can say with firm testimony, “Each of us can have eyes to see clearly and ears to hear distinctly the tender mercies of the Lord as they strengthen and assist us in these latter days. May our hearts always be filled with gratitude for His abundant and tender mercies” (David A. Bednar, “The Tender Mercies of the Lord,” Ensign, May 2005, 99).
Teens: Is Being a Little Off Course Okay?
Filed under: For the Strength of the Youth, Life Lessons, Living the Gospel, Peer Pressure
“It can’t hurt.”
“Try it just this once.”
“It’s not like taking one drink/puff/shot/etc. will make you addicted.”
Heard these phrases before? Odds are you have, or will, at some time of your life. Yet caving into any of the phrases, these pressure-filled persuaders, can cause us to become vastly off course.
My husband, a bishop in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (nicknamed the Mormon Church), was directed to put together a talk (sermon) to give to the ward (local congregation) on many different subjects. All of these subjects came back to one main theme:
Are we doing all that is necessary to keep us in alignment with God’s eternal plan?
In our search for stories and other things to help keep the flow of the talk, my husband came across a perfect example of what happens when we find ourselves even a little off course. This was related through another talk given by a modern day apostle by the name of Dieter F. Uchtdorf.
“In 1979 a large passenger jet with 257 people on board left New Zealand for a sightseeing flight to Antarctica and back. Unknown to the pilots, however, someone had modified the flight coordinates by a mere two degrees. This error placed the aircraft 28 miles (45 km) to the east of where the pilots assumed they were. As they approached Antarctica, the pilots descended to a lower altitude to give the passengers a better look at the landscape. Although both were experienced pilots, neither had made this particular flight before, and they had no way of knowing that the incorrect coordinates had placed them directly in the path of Mount Erebus, an active volcano that rises from the frozen landscape to a height of more than 12,000 feet (3,700 m).
As the pilots flew onward, the white of the snow and ice covering the volcano blended with the white of the clouds above, making it appear as though they were flying over flat ground. By the time the instruments sounded the warning that the ground was rising fast toward them, it was too late. The airplane crashed into the side of the volcano, killing everyone on board.
It was a terrible tragedy brought on by a minor error—a matter of only a few degrees” (Dieter F. Uchtdorf, “A Matter of a Few Degrees,” Ensign, May 2008, 57–60).
Again he relates what getting just a bit off course can truly mean.
“Even small errors over time can make a dramatic difference in our lives.
Let me share with you how I taught the same principle to young pilots.
Suppose you were to take off from an airport at the equator, intending to circumnavigate the globe, but your course was off by just one degree. By the time you returned to the same longitude, how far off course would you be? A few miles? A hundred miles? The answer might surprise you. An error of only one degree would put you almost 500 miles (800 km) off course, or one hour of flight for a jet.
No one wants his life to end in tragedy. But all too often, like the pilots and passengers of the sightseeing flight, we set out on what we hope will be an exciting journey only to realize too late that an error of a few degrees has set us on a course for spiritual disaster” (Dieter F. Uchtdorf, “A Matter of a Few Degrees,” Ensign, May 2008, 57–60).
We could probably take a little sniff, or puff, or drink, and we’d be done with it. It would not have hurt us in a moment. There is, however, another ending to the story, one those who try to pressure us into doing something wrong tend to gloss over. You could take one drink, and feel the need to drink for the rest of your life. You could take one puff, and spend your days using close to a thousand dollars a year or more to keep up the habit. You could take one sniff, and find yourself one day desperately entrenched in a life of crime just to support the very thing that has taken over your existence.
Essentially, you could find yourself vastly off course, with little or no hope of finding your way back.
When others begin chirping in your ear to just give it a try, think about whether or not you really want to take that chance. More often than not you’ll be giving away basic freedoms. Your life will be dominated by the very things those ‘friends’ promised wouldn’t hurt you.
When speaking to my youth girls about standing strong in the face of having to make a choice, we talked about things you can say. This is a vital step in protecting yourself, in staying on course. It’s only when you’ve prepared yourselves ahead of time that you can truly help yourself to say no, and stick to it. Things like, “Can you promise me I won’t become addicted? Can you promise me this won’t hurt me if I try it just once?” You might be surprised to find it’ll stop the person just long enough for you to make an escape.
When we make the right choices, when we stand by those things that God would have us do, we will not find ourselves vastly off course. If we cave in just a little, it’s possible (not to mention easier) to make a course correction early on through repentance. Once we recognize the need to make conscious decisions to stay on God’s path, we will remain in alignment with Him.
Teens: 116 Pages of the Book of Mormon Lost
Back when Joseph Smith, the man who restored Christ‘s Church, first started translating the Book of Mormon, his good friend, Martin Harris, began bugging him to take the first 116 pages to show his wife and a few close friends.
Joseph went to the Lord in prayer and asked this favor. The Lord told him no. Martin wasn’t satisfied, and begged Joseph to ask once again.
The answer came back the same.
Martin still wasn’t satisfied. Joseph wanted to make his friend happy, after all, Martin had freely given much money and time to Joseph because of his faith in the work. And so Joseph went back to the Lord. Finally the answer was yes, but it came at a price.
For three weeks Joseph waited for his friend to bring back the manuscript. As time stretched on and on his worry increased. At last his fears were confirmed when Martin came and told him the pages had been lost, stolen from his home. As described by Joseph’s Mother:
“He [Harris] took up his knife and fork as if he were going to use them, but immediately dropped them. Hyrum, observing this, said ‘Martin, why do you not eat; are you sick?’ Upon which Mr. Harris pressed his hands upon his temples, and cried out in a tone of deep anguish, ‘Oh, I have lost my soul! I have lost my soul.’
“Joseph, who had not expressed his fears till now, sprang from the table, exclaiming, ‘Martin, have you lost that manuscript? Have you broken your oath, and brought down condemnation upon my head as well as your own?’
“‘Yes; it is gone,’ replied Martin, ‘and I know not where.’ …
“‘Then must I,’ said Joseph, ‘return with such a tale as this? I dare not do it. And how shall I appear before the Lord? Of what rebuke am I not worthy from the angel of the Most High?’
“I besought him not to mourn so,…” continues his mother. “But what could I do to comfort him, when he saw all the family in the same situation of mind as himself; for sobs and groans, and the most bitter lamentations filled the house. However, Joseph was more distressed than the rest, as he better understood the consequences of disobedience. And he continued pacing back and forth, meantime weeping and grieving, until about sunset, when, by persuasion, he took a little nourishment.
“The next morning, he set out for home. We parted with heavy hearts, for it now appeared that all which we had so fondly anticipated, and which had been the source of so much secret gratification, had in a moment fled, and fled forever.” (History of Joseph Smith by His Mother, Lucy Mack Smith, ed. Preston Nibley, Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1954, pp. 128–29.)
Joseph lost the power to translate after that. He went for quite some time humbling himself and repenting. It was not an easy time for him, or for Martin.
Because of the choices these two men had made, the first book in the Book of Mormon, another testament of Jesus Christ, the Book of Lehi, was lost. But this was not as dire a situation as we might think.
The Lord in His infinite knowledge knew this might happen, and so He directed Lehi’s son, Nephi, to keep another sort of record of the same years. While we have lost a great account with the missing pages, we still have everything the Lord’s deems necessary in the words of Nephi.
Parent and Leaders – a Scriptural Focus on Guiding Teens
As we traveled in the car one day my 7 year old son asked me, “Mom, are there any guys who used to be bad guys, but then wanted to be good guys, and then became prophets?” Not exactly your average, everyday question.
I frantically searched my brain and came up with one name: Alma.
The Book of Mormon, another testament of Jesus Christ, relates the story of a man named Alma the Younger (his father was also named Alma). In his youth he was wicked, choosing evil over good, and persuaded many to turn their backs on the Lord’s Church. His father prayed night and day for something to happen that would cause a change of heart in his son. His prayers were answered.
An angel appeared before him and his friends, who just happened to be the king’s sons. They were immediately called to repentance, and Alma was a new man (Please read Mosiah 27 for a full account). He became a righteous prophet for the Lord’s Church.
Alma had three grown sons, who had all worked with him in ministering to the people. There comes a point when Alma decides it’s time to counsel with his boys, and so he takes them aside one by one to talk.
First is Helaman. Alma begins by bearing his testimony and sharing with this mighty son his own conversion story. He encourages his son to discover for himself if these things are true, to gain his own testimony. Alma encourages Helaman to keep up with the record of the people, to study the scriptures, and then to act upon those things he’s studied. Last he tells his son to counsel with the Lord, to keep the commandments, and promises that as he does so, his life will be blessed (comprising Alma chapters 36-37).
Alma then takes his second son, Shiblon. Shiblon had been through much in his life because of his work as a missionary. Though we don’t know details, we are told he was persecuted, yet showed great faith and dedicated to the Lord. Alma tells his son he had found great joy in this, his son. He again relates his conversion, and then gently reminds his son to remain on his course of righteousness (Alma chapter 38).
Last, but certainly not least, Alma calls for his son Corianton. In this son he had been given much reason to mourn, for though he started out attempting to accomplish the Lord’s work, he quickly fell into iniquity. Because of this choice an entire people were not given the chance to hear the word of God.
Alma was able to relate to this son in an important way – he could tell his son he knew what would happen if he didn’t change his ways, and he wanted to see his son make a change for good. As he states, “I would not dwell upon your crimes, to harrow up your soul, if it were not for your good. But behold, ye cannot hide your crimes from God; and except ye repent they will stand as a testimony against you at the last day” (Alma 39:7-8).
And so Alma begins to show his son exactly where he needed to start. Though I won’t go into it all now, I will say Corianton did make a change, and he became a very righteous man.
I wanted to post about this today to because as parents and leaders of youth we have been given a very valuable tool in learning how to help, counsel, and encourage our youth.
First, we are to take our children aside one at a time. Often teens, and children, are more likely to talk with an adult if it’s just the two of you. We need to bear our testimony of what we believe and what we know to be true. Those we have been entrusted with to teach in the ways of the Lord rely on our testimony for many years until they are ready to discover their own. When that time comes we need to remind them that finding a testimony comes in many different ways.
Relate your own conversion story to your teen. Let them know where you were, why you were searching for the answers, and how it all happened. Was the confirmation all at once, or did it come over time? Encourage your child to ask others about their own conversion stories.
Remind your teens to study the scriptures, but don’t stop there. Let them know they need to experiment upon the words they read, to see if they are true. Tell them it’s important to pray to the Father for confirmation or dismissal of an idea, so they will not be easily led astray.
Here’s a big one: tell your children when they do something right! I cannot stress this enough. Too often we focus on the things they do wrong. While the wrong choices need to be addressed immediately, we should always offer an extra helping of love right after.
Remember that even the good kid needs to be reminded of the commandments and laws of God.
Don’t forget that with some people you have to be patient, patient, patient, and more patient! They may not get the concept you’re trying to relate the first time. Or the second. Or the fifth. But keep going in your own faith. Let them know you still believe in them and their ability to make the correct choices.
Encourage your teens to pay attention to the clean things in this world. Remind them it’s important to counsel with righteous family members, and to turn to the Lord with all their might, mind and strength when tempted to do something wrong. If they slip up, say it’s okay. They simply need to acknowledge their mistakes, repent, and move on.
Last, but certainly not least, we need to teach them about Christ. The more they know about Him, His ways, and His purposes behind every act, the easier it will become to follow Him.
We have a responsibility to help our children and teens to follow a path that will lead them back to our Heavenly Father, and fortunately that same loving Father has given us some great guides in raising these impressionable, precious spirits.