Sometimes people wonder why God allows bad things to happen. This is sometimes even used as an excuse for not believing in God. Some people will suggest that if there is a God and He loves us, He will make everything pleasant and happy all the time.
This subject will be addressed in more detail in my next post, but for now, it’s important to remember that we didn’t come here on an extended vacation. Our life is more like school. Our job in mortality is to gain experiences and develop faith in God, and the ability to live the gospel even when we aren’t in God’s presence. We’re to be tested and to learn and grow.
Parents know it’s irresponsible to over-protect a child. If we shield our children from every sadness, every trial, every mistake, he will never grow into a well-balanced, confident, self-sufficient person. He will be a terrible adult unless allowed to make mistakes and face hardship during his learning years. Often people who face the hardest challenges become the strongest people.
Heavenly Father is not an irresponsible parent. He is perfect and therefore His parenting is perfect. He knows that if He protects us from everything, we will never learn or grow. We aren’t puppets. We don’t want our earthly parents controlling every aspect of our lives, and we wouldn’t want God to act like a puppeteer entertaining Himself. We want Him to be parental. These are our learning years and life has no purpose if we’re not given agency.
And so, because we have agency, we can choose to do what God wants us to do, or we can choose to disobey. We accept the consequences of our choices, since we can choose our actions, but not the consequences.
In addition, we can’t choose who our decisions affect. Seldom do we make our choices in isolation. They nearly always affect others. This means that sometimes people suffer due to the choices of others. The only way to prevent this from happening would be to take away agency and become puppets. That was how Satan wanted it, but it wasn’t God’s way.
Lehi, the first Book of Mormon prophet, explained it this way to his son Jacob:
11 For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so, my first-born in the wilderness, righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad. Wherefore, all things must needs be a compound in one; wherefore, if it should be one body it must needs remain as dead, having no life neither death, nor corruption nor incorruption, happiness nor misery, neither sense nor insensibility.
12 Wherefore, it must needs have been created for a thing of naught; wherefore there would have been no purpose in the end of its creation. Wherefore, this thing must needs destroy the wisdom of God and his eternal purposes, and also the power, and the mercy, and the justice of God.
13 And if ye shall say there is no law, ye shall also say there is no sin. If ye shall say there is no sin, ye shall also say there is no righteousness. And if there be no righteousness there be no happiness. And if there be no righteousness nor happiness there be no punishment nor misery. And if these things are not there is no God. And if there is no God we are not, neither the earth; for there could have been no creation of things, neither to act nor to be acted upon; wherefore, all things must have vanished away. 2 Nephi 2
Throughout the story of Lehi and his family, we see how the agency of the two oldest brothers brought sorrow to a valient family. They had agency and chose to use it poorly. Those who chose well were blessed for their choices, but still suffered from the bad choices of the two oldest brothers.
It’s often easy to accept that we have to suffer for our own poor choices; it’s less easy to accept that we sometimes also suffer for the poor choices of others. We see the parallels in many aspects of our life, however. The only way we can guarantee the free practice of our religion, for instance, is to guarantee it for everyone else. The only way we can have agency is to allow others to have it, too.
It’s critical to remember that God is always in charge. He doesn’t always step in to stop bad things, since agency must be allowed, but He is very good at “Plan B.” When your agency is altered due to the poor choices of others, God can work with that if you’ll work with Him. Every trial can become a blessing when you pray to find out how God wants you to use the trial.
As pleasant as a trial-free life might seem, we don’t really want one. We would give up far too much for the privilege, and any plan championed by Satan is not one we want to follow.
Here, then, is a great truth. In the pain, the agony, and the heroic endeavors of life, we pass through a refiner’s fire, and the insignificant and the unimportant in our lives can melt away like dross and make our faith bright, intact, and strong. In this way the divine image can be mirrored from the soul. It is part of the purging toll exacted of some to become acquainted with God. In the agonies of life, we seem to listen better to the faint, godly whisperings of the Divine Shepherd.” (James E. Faust, “Refined in Our Trials,” Ensign, Feb 2006, 2–7)
The late Terrie Lynn Bittner—beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend—was the author of two homeschooling books and numerous articles, including several that appeared in Latter-day Saint magazines. She became a member of the Church at the age of 17 and began sharing her faith online in 1992.
