Fathers Provide

“Thank you, Dad, for providing for me”

I was one of the lucky ones—I had a father who fulfilled his role as a provider quite well. As a child I didn’t even know what this role was, I just trusted each day would be as happy as the last. Little did I know, it was his consistent work as a provider to the family that brought on those feelings of trust. As a teenager, I got angry at him for not understanding my every mood, and yet he continued to be the provider. As an adult I looked for a good man to call my husband and found one—a provider, like my own father had been.

Is it a coincidence that the role model of a great provider is what I sought to have in my life? No. From before our earthly existence, we were the recipients of perfect fatherly nurturing from the Supreme Provider to us all. That being is God the Eternal Father.

A child’s view of dad.

I remember my father’s schedule—he left for work early and came home by 5 p.m. He exercised in his room, finishing with a head stand against the wall. He took an evening shower, then we all sat down to dinner together where he led in family prayer. He didn’t interact much with us afterwards—he spent his time reading. But when he did, he was warm and sweet with me, fun and rambunctious with my brothers and the dog. I caught him hugging my mother in the kitchen a lot—that made me feel safe for some reason. On Sundays he always drove the family to church—we never missed a single Sunday.

My father had a routine that never wavered. This routine meant stability for me, a foundation of security and safety. I could explore the world—from my backyard to the local park and all my neighbor’s houses in between. I could do so in safety because my father provided stability. Who knew he was struggling at work each day to make ends meet? Who knew he was putting himself through school at night for his PhD? Who knew he had personal struggles with his family and friends overseas, whom he tried to help as best he could? I didn’t. All I knew was what I saw—a father who came home to our house, a house full of food, clothing, furniture, toys, and love—everything that mattered to me. I didn’t even realize he was providing it.

A teenager’s view of dad.

As a teen, I struggled with my dad. He didn’t understand my every mood; he didn’t jump every time I had a drama-moment. He didn’t love the things that I loved or hate the things I hated. He didn’t listen—but then again, neither did I. All he did was follow his routine. It seemed so boring, so predictable, and yet so steady.

The familiarity was enough to drive me crazy. But through it all, there were music lessons, band rehearsals, play practices, and athletic events for my brothers. Someone had to provide for the instruments and equipment. Someone had to work the long hours so my mom could be the chauffeur. Someone had to give us driving lessons. Someone had to be the consistent, faithful, provider. That someone was my father.

An adult’s view of dad.

As an adult I grew to understand my father’s routine steadily, with the wisdom of seasoned eyes. His was a habit of constant faith—faith in his role to provide. He was the provider first and foremost—his own desires became secondary. He gave all that he had for his family. I didn’t see it as a child and I didn’t appreciate it as a teenager, but I craved it as an adult. I married a man who was a paradigm of this quality. My husband is a wonderful provider.

What if your dad was not the best provider?

Perhaps you never understood your father’s challenges in providing for the family or for you. He may have been struggling with personal trials like pain, abuse, or lack of self-worth. Maybe his circumstances made it appear he had fallen short of his role. Or maybe you were just too hard on him. The role of a provider is a heavy burden that when unappreciated can crush a man even when he is doing his best. Forgive your father for his mistakes. He’s spent a lifetime forgiving you.

Perhaps your father was absent from the family. You may even dismiss the idea of the importance of a father because he wasn’t around. If so, it must hurt so badly, thinking you missed out on something wonderful. It hurts because you long for something that is good and right—a father figure who won’t let you down.

I don’t know why some fathers are good providers while others are not. I do know that no matter what our situation is on Earth, we all have a Father who will not let us down—our Heavenly Father.

Heavenly Father—our first provider

As I’ve come to understand the importance of a good provider, I’ve realized where the model began—in heaven. Our own Father in heaven is the father of our spirits. We learned as spirit children at His knee, but we also learned by watching His routine. He had been providing for us all along while we waited to be born. He sustained us, taught by example how we should live our lives, then provided a place for us to be born and cared for by parents on Earth. He also provided a way back home by giving us a Savior, Jesus Christ, to overcome sin and death. Heavenly Father was not just our first provider, but our most exemplary one.

Think about it. Before we were born, our Father in Heaven and Jesus Christ created the Plan of Salvation—the plan for us to come to Earth, live here and be tested, then return home clean from sin and death through the grace of our Savior. This was the first great example of a father providing for his children—a Heavenly Father and his spirit children. What a grand concept, and yet similar to a child’s perspective, we could not possibly understand it all. But we loved Him, trusted Him, and so, followed Him.

Once we were born, we began to learn and grow. Our relationship to our Heavenly Father also began to grow. If you’ve ever wrestled with Him in prayer, you can relate to a teenager struggling with her biological father. How is that really different from us struggling to understand God’s will? It isn’t. We try to make Him see our way, when in reality, his constant unwavering way of providing us with eternal blessings is truly what saves us. We struggle a lifetime to understand Him, and He never stops providing what we need.

Once we leave this earth life, our eyes are opened a little more to His methods. We have a more complete picture—that of a loving Father who knew what was best all along. If we learned our lessons well, we too would have the desire to provide our posterity the same divinity, patterned after His eternal plan. We would desire to be in His presence—to surround ourselves with the family that declares Him as the head.

Fatherhood is patterned after a Heavenly Father

Fatherhood is to preside over the family and to provide for their needs—this is the pattern God set up from before we were born. When fathers on Earth do their best to be good fathers, they follow this plan. When they fall short, they are only human—forgive them so they can try again, and again. If we lose faith in fatherhood, we turn away from the pattern that provides eternal life. We lose our relationship with fathers, all fathers, on Earth as well as in heaven. To all fathers who read this—thank you. Thank you for providing for your family and for following the pattern set forth by our Heavenly Father.