Making…AND KEEPING..New Year’s resolutions with ONE simple rule:

Well, not so much keeping them as living with them.

Why am I writing this now? Why write this when many people have already killed their new year’s resolutions by this point?

write-593333_640That is exactly why I’m writing it now. This is the un-New Year’s Resolution/Non-OCD goal setting article.  This is a practical, life happens but I still want to do great things article. This is a I keep telling myself I won’t set goals, but I can’t resist the pull article. This is about how I get things done and why I continue to set goals, even when I know whole weeks of my year will be sick, laundry filled, bleachy kind of weeks.

Perhaps looking back at last year will be helpful: Last year I set two main goals. The first was to read the Old Testament in a year. The second was to read the first six books in the Great Books Series. How’d I do?  I read to Jeremiah in the Old Testament. I read four and a half books in the Great Books series. Success!

Rule number 1- Focus on progress not perfection.

ENJOY THE JOURNEY! Appreciate progress wherever it is found! I don’t grade my goals in some sort of pass/fail, all or nothing, way. Even the goals I set for “every day I will…..” I count the days I DO that thing and consider THAT progress. Focusing on the positive keeps me going. I don’t want to be stopped abruptly by one crazy day!  

Start whenever you darn well think will work for you.  

When we accept the arbitrary January 1 starting point-we may be setting ourselves up for failure. Did you stay up late December 31st so you’ll be tired? yes. yes you did. Are you at your best when you’re tired? Is January 1st a holiday so you’re off schedule? yes. yes it is…again being off schedule can make everything harder. If you are recording progress not perfection, you don’t need to have done something every single day. What you do January 1st is a part of the process and can prepare you for progress. Holidays are seldom perfect. Start when works for you. Accept January 1st as a part of your Black mom and daughter readingjourney not an indicator of how the year will ALL go. If you are all ready to start December 29th…good for you. Change whenever you can! Appreciate that desire and act on it.

See the goal as a part of your LIFE not a part of your year.

I made goals for the year. They were specific with a deadline and all of that, but I will read the scriptures this year too…reading the Old Testament was a part of something I will always value. When our goals are something we will always value, it’s easier to appreciate any progress. See the progress made as a part of that greater value and not just a checklist that will be done and out of your life.

Simplify your goal midstream.

About halfway through last year I had a baby. I do have experience with babies and so I’ve learned every baby has been different. Some slide in so smoothly and sleep like darling little angels…actually I’ve never had that baby. I am eternally optimistic that I will be able to keep doing some things, and every time..life gets scrambled up like it’s some sort of “will it blend” test. Keep your values in mind. Notice the progress and figure out a way to keep moving forward. Appreciate the progress. You may completely change your approach. In my case-before the baby I was reading the Old Testament in a purse sized, darling covered copy of the Bible. I was marking verses and had colored pencils and it was all so pretty.

Then came Lisa. My eyes were too tired to see the smaller size-so I went back to my larger bible. I was tired and thus reading more often when other little people were awake. The colored pencils became communal property and kept disappearing. I bought six sets. One day I remember walking around the house looking for colored pencils or at least ONE red pencil. I spent 15 minutes of my reading time searching until I let it go and kept reading. Don’t be afraid to strip your goal down to make it manageable.

To read all of Britt Kelly's articles, please click here.

To read all of Britt Kelly’s articles, please click here.

Remember-progress NOT perfection.

Life is not all or nothing. I am not going to opt out of what I really value because life made a few things impossible. So set those resolutions, aim for the stars, delay the trip for sick leave, change planes, then catch a booster rocket on the moon, then enjoy the view as you go.

About Britt Kelly
Britt grew up in a family of six brothers and one sister and gained a bonus sister later. She camped in the High Sierras, canoed down the Colorado, and played volleyball at Brigham Young University. She then served a mission to South Africa. With all of her time in the gym and the mountains and South Africa, she was totally prepared to become the mother of 2 sons and soon to be 9 daughters. By totally prepared she means willing to love them and muddle through everything else in a partially sleepless state. She is mostly successful at figuring out how to keep the baby clothed, or at least diapered, though her current toddler is challenging this skill. She feels children naturally love to learn and didn’t want to disrupt childhood curiosity with worksheets and school bells. She loves to play in the dirt, read books, go on adventures, watch her children discover new things, and mentor her children. Her oldest child is currently at a community college and her oldest son is going to high school at a public school. She loves to follow her children in their unique paths and interests. She loves to write because, unlike the laundry and the dishes, writing stays done. Whenever someone asks her how she does it all she wonders what in the world they think she’s doing.

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