I have always loved the writings of Carol Lynn Pearson until the publication of this book. I was devastated from reading The Ghost of Eternal Polygamy: Haunting the Hearts and Heaven of Women and Men by Carol Lynn Pearson. She has promoted and even encouraged the idea to mainstream members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS Church) that God does not love them, because He wants His daughters to live in a polygamous relationship in Heaven. Bull cocky!! There is so much false doctrine in this book I don’t even know where to begin.
Under the guise of her self proclaimed “wise-woman elder” position, she discusses the doctrine of polygamy in Mormonism from its beginnings to modern day. The writing is excellent, but it has a dark pall about it, as she shows the findings of a survey taken by LDS Church members who have felt heartaches and terror from thinking that the only way to the top of Heaven is through plural wives marrying one man. This is just not so.
Carol Lynn Pearson
There were 8,000 people who participated in her survey for the book. I took this survey as well and I distinctly remember thinking that the wording of this survey was manipulating a certain idea…and that idea was that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints were misleading their members into temple “sealing” marriages unknowingly to “trick” them into polygamy. To tell them that they were required to live in a polygamous relationship in order to get to the highest kingdom of Heaven.
I was one of the few in number who was happy or not bothered by the doctrine of polygamy, because I know that we would never be forced to do something by God we would NOT want to do. That is called agency, and that is what we were given eternally. Somehow, Mrs. Pearson forgot to mention this aspect of our lives in her book.
A quote conveniently omitted from this book as well would give relief to many men and women who she has said are haunted by the idea of required polygamy:
“Do not speculate about whether plural marriage is a requirement for the celestial kingdom. We have no knowledge that plural marriage will be a requirement for exaltation.”
This was a direct quote to Seminary teachers of the LDS Church for their classroom lessons on polygamy.
We have the true gospel of Jesus Christ, and yes, there are the unfortunate cruel Priesthood leaders as were written about in the book, but God is not cruel. According to this book, there are many heartbroken women and men who either have left the Church, or who live in contempt as members, because of perceived doctrines of polygamy and what heaven might be like under those doctrines.
This book is full of false doctrine.
I am a member in good standing with my temple recommend in hand and a sealed spouse waiting for me in Heaven, and I was greatly disturbed by Mrs. Pearson’s writings of this book. The nagging feeling of dread throughout this whole narrative is not at all the feeling of how most of the adult members feel about polygamy, and certainly not how God wants us to feel about the prospect of returning to His presence.
God loves his children.
He loves his daughters and His sons equally.
No one sex is better than the other, and I am astonished that Mrs. Pearson has promoted this idea throughout this book. I know I am loved and have a special place in my Heavenly Father’s heart, but apparently there are over 7,000 people who don’t know or believe this. Even worse, Mrs. Pearson promotes their wallowing and cries of an unloving God who would force or pressure all of his righteous children to live in polygamous relationships in the hereafter.
If you are disturbed by this idea, then you won’t want to read this book. I almost regret reading it myself, but I did so to be open-minded and discuss its principles with a friend. Don’t be duped by what is written. Know that we are God’s children who are greatly loved and would not be forced or pressured to do anything we would not want to do.
Know that we can receive a fulness of joy after we are resurrected. From King Benjamin’s address in the Book of Mormon we read: (Mosiah 2:41)
“And moreover, I would desire that ye should consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. For behold, they are blessed in all things, both temporal and spiritual; and if they hold out faithful to the end they are received into heaven that thereby they may dwell with God in a state of never-ending happiness. O remember, remember that these things are true; for the Lord God hath spoken it.”
Great words of comfort are spoken through King Benjamin:
“O remember, remember that these things are true….”
That never-ending happiness spoken of here is for those who have qualified for Celestial Glory, and therefore are able to abide Celestial Law receiving a fullness of joy. Once they have qualified for that kingdom, then they will receive whatever will make them happiest. That is what the Brethren (LDS Church leadership) mean when they say that righteous men and women who never had the opportunity to wed during mortality will receive every blessing they desire in the Celestial realm. Every blessing we desire.
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Can we not trust in our God that whatever the heavenly arrangement, we will be joyful in what is to come? The only sorrow we will feel will be for those loved ones who suffer because of their unrighteous choices on earth, not because we are forced to live a polygamous arrangement against our will.
We cannot let the whims and winds of the world tell us that we will have no joy in the afterlife. That is preposterous. We can and will have joy in the hereafter by our righteous living and know that we will be cared for by a righteous God.
Valerie Steimle has been writing as a family advocate for over 25 years. As a convert to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, she promotes Christian living in her writings and is the mother of nine children and grandmother to twelve. Mrs. Steimle authored six books and is a contributing writer to several online websites. To her, time is the most precious commodity we have and knows we should spend it wisely.
To read more of Valerie's work, visit her at her website, The Blessings of Family Life.
This feels extremely dismissive to the pain of many members of the church who have been misinformed or misguided or otherwise confused. I wouldn’t be so quick to assume that ‘most adult members’ hold ANY particular views – we are a huge church with many different backgrounds and experiences of and understanding of the doctrines of the church. I know many people who have found great hope and comfort in Ms Pearson’s disputation of the mistaken narrative they received from well-meaning but misinformed leaders and teachers over the years. Let’s try to look for empathy and love for our struggling brothers and sisters, rather than condemning those who feel the pain of questioning because they have not been blessed to understand the same loving Father in Heaven that we enjoy.
I am grateful that you have the gift of discernment, as pertaining to righteous doctrine and living, and the courage to share publicly your view of false teachings, when applicable. Sometimes we are not aware of these teachings until brought to our attention through various means such as this blog. Thank you for sharing your testimony of Heavenly Father’s love for His children, regarding some sensitive issues. Eternal love is God’s gift, and it should not be redefined through misguided authoring of opinion.
Thank you for this well written and carefully thought out review! This book was recommended to me by a friend, but I think now that I will abstain as I want to dwell on the positive uplifting messages from our Father. Any idea that I am somehow less important or less loved than another is, as you said, preposterous!
Thank you for your comments.. I know there is pain of others and I know they can feel the love of a kind, wise Heavenly Father so I am hoping more who are grieved will read these words.
Carol Lynn Pearson has no authority to comment on official LDS doctrine. She is an established left liberal and to me not a source of great wisdom. How things will be organized in the eternities is beyond our present comprehension. It should be obvious that a fair and loving God will not force anyone, women included, into a relationship they do not want. Things will work out, maybe differently than we understand, but they will be good. I know things I will not share here, but things will work out.
I absolutely agree. We published this commentary because there were those who were reading the book and not understanding that it was full of wild speculation. Thank you for your input.