Here it is a few weeks away from Christmas and you find yourselves stressed. Your bank account has not magically doubled, you are not suddenly energetic or healthy, your family is not instantly around you, and you did not overnight turn into a Pinterest queen with a flock of elves..stress.
For whatever reason, you find yourself in the midst of the season of joy and hope…but not feeling ANY of the joy or hope.
1-Admit the impossibles…
In my quiet, thoughtful moments I want to have Christmas be a way for each of my children to worship the Savior. I want them to feel closer to Him. I want them to feel joy. I want them to feel His love.
and…
and what? and Legos. Apparently I also want Legos and PJs. AND I want to be at the family Christmas party that is four states away and in many other ways impossible this year. I also want peace-yes for the whole world would be nice, but I’d settle for a family devotional without…crying. I’d also like sleep, but even I recognize that as unrealistic.
While some of these things are possible, I want a few impossible things. What impossible things do you want?
I have frequently found myself unwilling to plan the Christmas I have available to me because I haven’t dealt with the impossibles. I know I can’t go to my family Christmas party, so what have I done about it? I know when we have our Christmas devotionals there will be eye rolling and whining and toddler and baby interruptions. What can we do to either prevent or accept interruptions. Sometimes the distance between our impossibles and our realities are paralyzing. I can’t do what I want, so I do nothing. I don’t plan what I can plan. I don’t enjoy the love around me. I focus on the impossibles. I can’t find creative solutions when I don’t even admit the impossibles exist and are, really not happening.
2-Redefine the impossibles-
Once you’ve identified the impossible, you may need to mourn a little, it is sad. Then, CHOOSE to not stay there. Move on to what you can do. Identify what is important about your impossibles. What is the underlying principle? Can I work on an emotional connection with family who are not physically here? Can we have fun without spending so much money? What is the underlying principle? What do you want really? Can you do something?
3-Make a simple plan-
Do not check Pinterest before making your plan. Do not make a plan that will take over the entire month of December. Do not make a plan that involves exponential bank accounts and a Mary Poppins disposition. Keep in the realm of the possible and decide what YOU can do.
4-Don’t forget your real priorities.
Most of the daily stresses and impossibles come from little things that are ultimately NOT my highest priority. Yet I frequently forget that, and let daily Christmas business distract me. We have shopping lists and calendars and parties, if I don’t consciously plan things to help keep Christ the center of our Christmas, it won’t happen. It can be something as simple and magical as reading a single scripture a day by candle light or serving others. Whatever it is, plan it. Make your highest priority, a daily priority. Removing impossibilities makes more time for Christ.
Now this will not be your ideal Christmas. It will not be a perfect Christmas. It will not be everything you always imagined. Your toddler will still ask to blow out the candle through the entire Christmas devotional, BUT when I step out of the impossibles, I’m in a place to focus on what I really want for me and my children. When I focus on my priorities and take the impossibles out of the way and I do what I can, I am in place to love and feel loved. That’s a beautiful Christmas.
About Britt Kelly
Britt grew up in a family of six brothers and one sister and gained a bonus sister later. She camped in the High Sierras, canoed down the Colorado, and played volleyball at Brigham Young University. She then served a mission to South Africa.
With all of her time in the gym and the mountains and South Africa, she was totally prepared to become the mother of 2 sons and soon to be 9 daughters. By totally prepared she means willing to love them and muddle through everything else in a partially sleepless state. She is mostly successful at figuring out how to keep the baby clothed, or at least diapered, though her current toddler is challenging this skill.
She feels children naturally love to learn and didn’t want to disrupt childhood curiosity with worksheets and school bells. She loves to play in the dirt, read books, go on adventures, watch her children discover new things, and mentor her children. Her oldest child is currently at a community college and her oldest son is going to high school at a public school. She loves to follow her children in their unique paths and interests.
She loves to write because, unlike the laundry and the dishes, writing stays done. Whenever someone asks her how she does it all she wonders what in the world they think she’s doing.
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